


3KK: Who We Are

by crumbcake



Series: Three Kids Klance [5]
Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Alpha Lance (Voltron), Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alpha/Omega, Alternate Universe - Domestic, Alternate Universe - Parents, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Established Relationship, Happy Ending, Heavy Angst, Lactation, M/M, Omega Keith (Voltron), Other, Parenthood, Whump, dual reproductive system omega
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-26
Updated: 2019-05-30
Packaged: 2019-07-03 00:56:29
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 47,206
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15808050
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/crumbcake/pseuds/crumbcake
Summary: The last thing Keith wanted was to part from Lance knowing that there was a strong possibility that he might not come back. It was a horrible thought to live a life without him and raise Clara and Shiro on his own but Keith knew the stakes. And there was no way Lance was going to stay and be able to live with himself. Keith wouldn’t be able to live with himself.[In chapter one of my 3KK series, I wrote that Keith and Lance lived on an alliance planet and that Lance was gone for seven months because his sharpshooting skills were needed. This story goes through that time period. The whole series concentrates on family life, domesticity, and unabashed wild and enthusiastic sex between an old established couple. :)]WARNING: Immediate dive into sex.





	1. Goodbye (Prologue)

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for everyone that has encouraged me to keep writing!!! Ages in chapter 1: K26 L25 C9 Sh6m  
> Warnings on lactation (not really a big part of it but its there) and sex (big part of the whole series, lol).

“You belong on my cock.”

“Yes.” Keith gasped, feeling so hotly aroused that he thought he might pass out.

He was pushed down to the floor, his body curled in a shoulder stand with his head and shoulders cushioned on the pillows that Lance kicked into position. Fucking  _ finally _ Lance was treating him rougher than he had in months.

Lance stood over him, one steadying hand on Keith’s thigh as he stroked his imposing alpha sized hard-on. His gaze on Keith was a controlled fire, wholly possessive like he wanted to eat him alive. Keith struggled for a moment, the visual badly affecting his balance. 

“Where do you belong?” asked Lance easily; naturally self-assured and forceful as he’s grown older.

“On your fucking cock.” Keith whimpered. He wanted to rip Lance to shreds as he was fucked into oblivion.

Lance smiled crookedly, turning his gaze to Keith’s upturned ass, casually guiding his cock over top of his exposed ass and slit then teasing his asshole with quick soft smacks of his cock.  He smirked as Keith squirmed restlessly, unable to stop himself from clenching his muscles sporadically and leaking while Lance watched. Lance planted his feet further apart and leaned over Keith slightly, guiding his cock down to breach his twitching asshole. More slick seeped out, displaced by Lance as he sunk in.

“Where the fuck does that wet ass belong?”

Keith shook, fingers scrabbling the floor. “On your cock.” 

“That’s right” Even as prepared and relaxed as he was, Lance was a lot to bear. His dynamic related growth kicked in a few years ago and sex hadn’t been the same since. There was no such thing as spontaneous penetrative sex.

Keith flushed hot as he watched Lance’s body move and felt his cock push into his pussy. It was big, stretched him widely but all he wanted was more. More of Lance. More of his alpha bondmate. He met his eyes, catching the briefly exposed apprehension in them that was unrelated to the sex and sobered. 

Keith smiled softly. “I’m gonna be fine.”

Lance faltered, thrusting shakily then stopped, “I don’t want to go. You just had Shiro.”

“You need to go. I would go.”

Keith could smell the distress on his scent. Lance sighed, closing his eyes and wrestling with his inner torment before meeting Keith’s gaze again. The thinly veiled unhappiness settled, lurking behind the fog of lust as he slowly raked his eyes over Keith’s asshole, spread birthing slit and cock. His gaze was almost a physical touch as it travelled down Keith’s torso to his dripping too tight boobs to his face. Lance visibly shivered as he straightened, murmuring, “Gimme.” 

Keith sucked in a deep breath, Lance’s cock still partly inside him as he spread his thighs wider; feet far apart and flexing in the air.  He gave Lance more of him; would give him all of him if he could and panted as Lance fucked him. The thrusts were hard on him but he tried not to show his discomfort in taking so much of his alpha since he wanted every single fleeting second of it. He wasn’t gonna get fucked by his bondmate again for 6 months and he wanted to feel it inside for as long as he could. Six months. He felt his own fear rising and choked it down before Lance would pick up on it. 

Lance must’ve caught something in his scent because he pulled out abruptly much to Keith’s disappointment and moved away guiding Keith’s body gently to the floor using his grip on his hips. Keith sat up to glare at him but cheered up when he realized Lance was just changing positions and not stopping all together. Lance sat on a sturdy accent chair, hand on his cock and laughed at Keith’s gleeful smirk as he sprang off the floor to join him. 

“What are you even going to do with no dick for six months?”

Keith straddled his lap, feet braced on the ground and hands on Lance’s shoulders. “Fuck your brains out when you’re back.”

He took hold of Lance’s cock and aimed for his entrance when Lance hugged him tightly and nibbled at his neck.

“Anal. I want your ass too.”

Keith groaned, swaying in his arms and dropped his forehead on Lance’s shoulder to gather himself. He then ran a shaky hand down to his ass and stood up some to try and stretch the smaller secondary path inside.  Lance wriggled his finger alongside his as he said possessively directly in Keith’s ear, “You’re mine. all of you.” Keith whined, knocking his head back as he panted and began to hump the fingers inside. His chest was right in front of Lance who immediately latched on to a nipple and sucked; shamelessly swallowing and enjoying the milk Keith’s body produced. 

The first time around Keith didn’t let Lance anywhere near his boobs but he was in a better state of mind now and comfortable with himself so he let Lance mess around.  It was bizarre to have his bondmate e _ nthusiastically nurse  _ off his boobs but he quickly discovered that it felt good, relieved the uncomfortable pressure and Lance really was very obviously pleased by it so he let go of his hang up and enjoyed it. He stopped him anyway and locked lips with him for entirely different reasons. 

The cultures on the planet shared a communal mentality towards child rearing and resourcing - the Kingdom Sector where they lived provided free diaper and breastmilk services. Because of his Galra genes, his milk turned out to be compatible and beneficial for several desperate families whose babies could not breastfeed and could not drink synthesized alternatives. He tried to help where he could. 

Keith whimpered as he pulled his fingers out and shakily gripped his ass to spread himself wider, accidentally disturbing one of the thin scent collecting membranes Lance had placed on his skin. Lance quickly re-adjusted it, peeling it off and re-sticking before nudging his cock teasingly on Keith’s asshole. 

“Fuck. Fuck me.” Keith panted as he pulled away from the kiss.

“Sit on it, Kitten.” Lance rumbled, “Take your time.”

Keith carefully began to sink down and swivelled his hips, adjusting until he felt Lance’s cock stretching his anal tract. He whined as he bore down, more slick leaking from his inner pussy entrance as Lance kissed him. He felt ready to burst and there was no way he was getting all of Lance inside his ass. His body shook as he started a shallow rhythm, getting even wetter as he watched Lance watch his body bounce. 

Lance’s scent was overpowering. He felt lost in it, shaky and almost wheezing. His scent gland itched underneath the membrane patch covering it. 

“Lance.”

He was so full yet his pussy was clenching down on nothing and he couldn’t bear all the way down.

Lance ran his hands down his sides and dug his fingers in on his trembling waist, stopping him and pulling out. He swiped Keith’s slick, sanitizing his cock with the stuff so he can get back into his pussy.

“You’re so fucking horny, I can smell it on your scent.”

Keith was beyond talking in coherent sentences, just shaking in Lance’s arms, anxiously licking his lips and begging, “Please, please, please.” 

“Please what?”

“Fuck m- Ah! AH!” Lance pushed into the inner entrance of his pussy, scooping his arms underneath Keith’s thighs, spearing him on his cock as he grabbed onto his hips. Now a fully grown alpha, Lance was bigger everywhere, enveloping Keith making him feel small as Lance was strong enough to stand up while banging him. 

Keith held on shakily, crying out at being tethered only by Lance’s hands and his grip on Lance’s neck. He could feel the way Lance’s body strained from where his thighs rubbed against his torso. Each hard thrust felt like it was rearranging his insides.

“I’m coming.” Lance warned as he partly propped Keith on their bedroom wall. Keith swallowed roughly, as he wrapped his hand around his cock and fingered his clit. He watched Lance lose it, feeling his uncoordinated jerking thrusts inside. The flushed look of his alpha and that full up feeling triggered his own orgasm. His body felt like it dispersed around him in frenzied pieces, each constricting squeeze around Lance’s cock so deeply satisfying that he wished he could freeze the moment in time and milk him forever.  

Keith melted at last, unsure if he had any bones left in his body. He felt Lance prop him heavily on the wall as if his knees had buckled. He was worried for a second that he was about to be dropped but Lance seemed to worry too as he suddenly wrapped his arms tightly around Keith’s hips and braced better.

“Whew!” Lance said and stood up properly, carefully maneuvering back down to the chair. They were both drenched in sweat as they grinned at each other. 

Keith stretched out his legs and wiggled his toes as he caught his breath. “Finally a proper fuck.” 

Lance made a face. “Fuck off, you didn’t even want me to touch you during post-partum heat.” 

Keith opened his mouth and stopped because Lance had immediately lunged for a boob before he could get a word out and was mouthing him as if he was trying to get the whole thing in his mouth.

“Get off.”  Keith firmly shoved him back and laughed at the wistful forlorn look that Lance gave his chest. 

Lance sighed and slumped back, eyeing him cheerfully before the happiness seemed to dampen. A knot was forming in Keith’s throat because Lance was looking at him as if he was trying to memorize him because he might not see him again.

It was entirely possible. There were no guarantees in battles.

He began to run a finger over Lance’s chest to distract himself. Ran it slowly down from his chest to his shoulder and down to his arm. Lance flipped his hand palm up when Keith reached his wrist and stretched out his fingers so Keith spread his hand flat on top of his. Lance’s fingers were longer than his.

Keith noticed the stress pick up in his scent and looked up in time to see Lance’s face getting emotional.

“Your tiny fucking hand.” He croaked.

It probably didn’t help that Keith still looked soft from the pregnancy with muscles less defined and that he was lactating. The trauma of childbirth on his omega was still fresh on Lance’s mind and with a new baby his hormones had kicked into overprotective overdrive. He visibly struggled when he handed over Shiro to his namesake even though he’s the one that asked him to babysit.

Keith smiled in some amusement at his skewed perception, Yes, he was somewhat smaller than fellow male omegas but not by much, not tiny.  And Lance was a perfectly average male alpha, not enormous. He grabbed Lance’s pinky finger suddenly, forcibly pushing it in the wrong direction just enough to hurt but not far enough to actually dislocate or break though Lance was at his mercy. 

“Ow...why?! ...ow!”

Keith continued to look at him with amusement. “My hand’s big enough and strong enough to take care of myself and our kids.” 

“Ow..okay, okay let go!”

He gave one last threatening press then let go. “We’ll be fine. Six months is nothing.” Keith said much more confidently then he felt. Since having kids, he had never been without Lance for very long. “Just come back in one piece. Don’t make me fucking find you and kill you.”

“Got it.” The way Lance said that gave Keith deja vu; it echoed the times he was his right hand man in Voltron. He smiled to himself as he wrapped his arms loosely over Lance’s shoulders,

Lance shook his hand out in relief but was still looking at Keith in a way that made his heart ache.

“You’ve got toys for heat?” He asked. His first proper heat post-child was a ways off but Lance wasn’t going to be there for it. Him leaving was becoming all too real.

“Yeah” Keith ran his eyes over the multiple membrane patches he’d slapped on Lance which he would collect later and store to tie him over.

“‘kay.” said Lance, dispirited like he was hoping he didn’t so he could use it as an excuse to stay home. He sighed heavily “I can’t take anything that could broadcast other than the weapons.”

Keith already knew that. They were going to be out of communication the whole time.

“Okay?” He prompted.

“I don’t have any physical photos.”

“We’ll get smart paper tomorrow and transfer some photos on it.” 

He nodded unhappily. 

Keith swallowed, “They need help.” 

Lance nodded again, unmoved and perhaps even gloomier. 

“It’s what we do.”

Lance sighed. “Yeah. I mean of course I’m going but. Fuck.”

“Yeah.” 

Lance frowned unhappily and looked unsure as he said, “Maybe... I don’t know...”

The last thing Keith wanted was to part from Lance knowing that there was a strong possibility that he might not come back. It was a horrible thought to live a life without him and raise Clara and Shiro on his own but Keith knew the stakes. And there was no way Lance was going to stay and be able to live with himself. Keith wouldn’t be able to live with himself. 

Keith sighed and cupped the back of Lance’s neck with his hands.  He needed Lance to be unwavering in his resolve. 

He felt his way through his thoughts slowly.

“There are problems in our universe that are not our own. It’s easy to talk about the problems, tell people what they should or shouldn’t do about the problems then ultimately look away at the next shining issue. But these problems don’t go away - they grow and they become weapons for the powerful and corrupt.” 

Lance was looking at him, riveted, like there was nothing else in the world.

“They grow until there is no safe space left for anyone - just darkness.”

Keith looked down, gathering his thoughts to fully express them.

“We’ve done enough and have sacrificed enough.” He acknowledged and looked up, meeting Lance’s eyes fiercely. “But we’re powerful when others aren’t and all I give a shit about is a good future for our kids and their kids. The last thing I want is to help pave the path to darkness. Even as ex-Paladins, we defend the universe. They asked for help. We help.”

Lance didn’t move a muscle. He simply looked at him, unable to speak for a moment. They understood each other perfectly, expressions unyielding. 

“Yeah.” 

Lance said at last then ran his eyes down his torso and back. He smiled mischievously.

“Those are some big fancy words for someone with a dick halfway up his ass.”

Keith smirked, “Helps me think.”

Lance cracked up and squeezed him tightly, pulling out all the way. He stood up, taking Keith with him towards their bed.

“Did I tell you your fearless leader shit is a huge fucking turn on?” 

Keith exhaled and chuckled as he drew him into a kiss.


	2. I’ll Rise Up / Feel Like Dying

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: Explicit sex, adversity, graphic content, and struggle. You ready?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [Brackets mean spoken in Spanish] Also, please excuse roughness. I'll clean up later. :) (fyi - the chapter titles of chapter 2 - 4 are/will be lyrics from Andra Day's 'Rise Up')

Maybe it was divine grace that Shiro started sleeping through the night three days prior to Lance’s departure. They snuck in one last goodbye on their terms instead of settling for stolen kisses or meaningful double talk while tending to their kids.

Keith and Lance had moved from the apartments reserved for immigrating aliens to the more typical homecoves of the planet once they decided for sure to stay. Their homecove was standard for the planet, the rooms inside looked like hollowed out gourds, the fibrous walls naturally tinted in muted hues. They varied from yellow ochre to ivory in shades that shifted depending on the sunlight that shined through the material. The cove chemically reacted to the distance and heat of the sun; constricting or expanding depending on season and letting off a light fragrance that reminded Keith of rosemary and pine.

The scent was in the air as their bed swayed silently, spurred by their unhurried rhythmic motions. All beds were in form of hammocks that hung on four posts. The main part of the hammock was rectangular in shape and made of many layers of finely weaved cotton sewn into the netting of the bed. It bent slightly to the contours of their bodies but was firm enough to allow for leverage which Lance took full advantage of.

Keith worried his lip as he dug his fingers in on Lance’s back and pressed him closer still. He couldn’t look away from his besotted gaze. Three and a half vargas before Lance left him behind. He already missed how he was always looking at him and how his eyes softened especially for him. His touch and his dumb humor and the loving patience he had for their kids even when Keith was ready to scream was all going away. Keith sucked in Lance’s scent and spread his legs wider despite the discomfort of his size at that angle.

Lance smiled ruefully in response, running his hand over Keith’s thigh and easing his leg closer than the other so Keith’s thighs hugged his waist. He wasn’t keen on his final impression being a painful one.  He was already buried to the hilt, barely pulling out with each slow thrust, savoring every last tick he had with his omega. 

“I’m not gonna break.” argued Keith, cutting into the weighty silence that had befallen them.

“I know.” Lance replied meaningfully and ran his hand up to cradle the back of Keith’s neck, burying his fingers in the nape of his hair as his gaze flickered down to his lips then back to his eyes again.

Keith fought down a blush. 

They were bonded for nearly four years now yet sometimes he reverted to the little boy inside whose closest bond, before Shiro, was the detached care of the state. Only his dad had truly loved him and he only had a vague recollection of him. At times, it was jarring that so much love was directed at him. Nothing prior to his time with Voltron had prepared him for Lance.

Keith felt his body tremble and a fresh wave of his slick drench his alpha’s cock. 

Lance groaned, pressing his face on Keith’s shoulder, caught up in arousal as he babbled, nonsensically, “Fucking  _ wet _ . Made for me. You smell like the best baked bread.” He pulled back enough to meet his eyes, gaze searing. “You wet for me, Kitten?”

Keith swallowed, trying to shake the thought that this was really the last time with his alpha for a long time coming. Or possibly the last time... full stop. He croaked, “Yeah. For you.”

Lance shuddered and stilled inside him as he laid soft kisses on his scent gland. “My omega.”

Keith tried to memorize the moment. He was engulfed by Lance’s bigger body over top of him. It had been three years since his bondmate had fully grown into his dynamic. Keith loved it a lot.  He ran his hands over Lance’s broad shoulders before linking his hands together over the small of Lance’s back. Ran a warm foot over Lance’s calf. “Alpha.” He said appreciatively in between the moans drawn out from him. 

Lance propped his upper body up on his elbows and ran his fingers through Keith’s bangs, combing his hair away from his face to see him clearly. Keith felt the knot in his throat grow as Lance cupped his cheeks with his palms and laid tender kisses on his lips. Lance’s brow wrinkled and scent shifted as his anxiety for his omega got the best of him. 

“You promise to reach out to our friends?“ Lance asked.

“Reach out?” He didn’t have to look so worried.

“If you need help.”

Keith hesitated. “Help with what?”

“With anything Kitten. Just.. You’re not alone. You don’t have to shut people out. If the kids stress you out, our friends can help. The Wellspring too.”

Keith smiled as he ran his hands down to Lance’s ass. “Stop worrying about me. Or us. We’ll be fine. Focus on the mission.”

His bondmate was reluctant to be pulled from his concerns but smiled anyway, quietly teasing as he said, “What mission? Fucking you good?”

Keith laughed, “Yeah, the fucking me good mission.”

His laugh morphed into a whimper when Lance rocked into him. Lance tucked Keith’s bent legs under his arms as he nestled in close, nearly folding Keith in half as he worked his hips. Keith could hear the solid  _ slap   slap slap  _ of his balls hitting his ass as his alpha asked, “Like this?” 

“Yes. Yeah. Fuck.” Keith’s gaze grew hazy and heavy lidded with each thrust, the aching heat in his center spreading through his body. He squeezed reflexively and his eyes rolled up a little at the physical reminder that his thickened channel was impossibly stretched.  He wrapped his arms around Lance’s shoulders and hung on as his whole body coiled and burned hot.

Lance kept snapping his hips causing Keith’s world to narrow down to his alpha fucking him, bringing him to the brink. His mouth hung open as the next thrusts catapulted him to orgasm. He clung to Lance, stifling his whimpering groan as his body spasmed. Lance kept moving, rearranging his arms, tucking them under Keith and sliding them down his back to pull him closer still. 

Keith buried his face on Lance’s shoulder, desperately trying to clear his head so he could remember everything about the moment - the scent, touch, and sound of his bondmate bringing him pleasure and chasing his own climax. It was almost sorrowful when Lance’s body jerked and stilled, spilling ejaculate inside him. 

Keith breathed, frowning. He felt overly spent yet he didn’t want it to be over. Neither did Lance. 

Before Keith could breathe right again or think too hard, Lance gently pulled out and surprised him by filling him with his fingers, rocking them as he crushed their lips together to stifle Keith’s shout. Lance hiked his leg higher as he ruthlessly working his g-spot area. Keith blushed as his body welled up with slick, sobbing into the kiss as he came, squirting on Lance and the mattress weave underneath him.

He felt him slow to a stop and gently pull out as they kissed; felt him slide his fingers through the wetness, running his hand slowly over Keith’s birth slit and cock, coating him with his own slick.

Keith sighed, shivering when their lips parted. The next jostling movement had him hissing in alarm, “ _ Lance _ !” 

Lance had scooted down his body, fully exposing him by pushing his legs back. “Keep them there, Kitten. Stay spread for me.” 

Keith hooked his arms under his knees and pressed his lips together tight, desperate to stay quiet as his alpha’s tongue thrust into his overstimulated hole. Wet, spongy muscle pushed into his loose secondary entrance, tasting the fluids inside as Lance wiggled a finger into his tight anal tract. Keith’s body twisted feverishly overwhelmed by the tongue and finger until he was humping back. 

Lance peeled one of Keith’s hands from under his knee so he could move his leg onto his shoulder as he pulled out, leaving Keith achingly hollow. Keith shoved a pillow over his face, crying out hoarsely as Lance licked a wet path into the heated core of his sealed birth slit. He felt Lance tilt his head sideways as he pressed Keith’s folds together with one hand so that he trapped his squirming tongue in Keith’s labia.  

The finger in Keith’s ass hooked perfectly and the dexterous tongue slogged through his pinched folds, reaching his clit and deftly tickling. Keith squeaked as his alpha had his way with him.  His fingers dug into Lance’s hair. The orgasm this time was dual, his untouched cock spilling slick-like ejaculate as he dribbled hotly further below.

Lance carried right on, swirling his tongue over his mound, taking his time as he made his way up Keith’s body. He licked away the slick and lapped every drop of come, sucking Keith’s cock into his mouth, tasting him there too. He moved on to his midriff, kissing and nuzzling the supple muscle there before paying special attention to Keith’s flat chest, tugging and sucking on one stiff nipple then the other and back again. 

Keith’s body wouldn’t stop trembling. His alpha kept taking from him and all Keith wanted was to give him more. “Lance…” He sighed.

“You smell so good.” Lance murmured, his hot puff of breath tickling Keith’s chest. Lance was clearly blitzed out on Keith’s pheromones as he reached his neck and nuzzled him there. “So soo good.”

He eased out his finger from inside Keith just long enough to roll them over, causing the mattress to sway slightly as Keith melted on top of him, his legs dropping apart over the outside of Lance’s thighs. Their eyes locked as Lance spread him and sunk three fingers back inside as Keith whimpered; two into his pussy and one tucked into his anal tract, filling him up. 

_ Mine _ . 

Blistering pleasure that his alpha all but planted a flag on him coursed through Keith. He arched his ass a little higher, wanting to be wholly possessed by Lance.

_ Yours _ .

They breathed. 

First dawn was rising outside which made the curved walls glow faintly as light filtered through the home. The lamp they had turned on began to dim. Keith watched the play of light on his alpha’s face, running his fingers over his cheeks, wanting badly to go with him on the mission.

“You’re mine, right?” Lance wondered out loud. “You smell like you’re mine.”

Keith huffed softly in lazy disbelief. “What do you think?” 

“Say it though.” Lance smiled.

Keith swallowed and wriggled on the fingers fully buried inside. Their locked gaze was too raw, too exposed as he said, “I’m yours. You’re mine too.”

Lance nodded, “Yeah.”

He wrapped Keith up in a slow hug, easing his fingers out gently and running his hand over his back and ass, petting him. “Take a lot of snapshots of the kids. You gotta catch Shiro’s first words- record everything about that. And crawling. His first walk too if I’m not back.”

Fuck. Keith squeezed him, “I will.” He promised.

Lance sighed and sat up taking Keith with him. He eyed him worriedly. “If you need a break contact the Wellspring. That is what they’re there for, they can help.”

Keith smiled, loving his alpha. “Are you my caseworker now? I never listened to caseworkers.”

Lance kissed him and smirked. “Wait til you meet my mom, dad, and sisters. Your shit is not gonna work on them.”

“Looking forward to it.” Keith grinned, enjoying the lift to Lance’s scent, knowing how happy it made his alpha that he seemed content with someday meeting his family. He kissed him again. “Time to get moving.”

Lance nodded, closing his eyes and taking a deep breath. Keith watched the subtle change to his body language as he slowly exhaled and switched mental gears. His gaze was a little cooler when he looked at Keith again; he was fortifying himself as he smiled. Keith recognized the deceptive lightheartedness he used to hide behind as a Paladin. It masked the level of alertness and deep compassion of his character.  The smartass soldier was moving to the fore, leaving the doting (still smartass) father and bondmate behind. 

Keith smirked. “Ready?”

Lance eyed him, determined and calm as he said, “Ready. I’ll go wake Clara.”

“Okay. I’ll get Shiro ready.”  Lance would want to spend as much time as he could with their daughter and son. He had already spent the last few weeks talking on and off about his deployment and reassuring Clara. Keith offered, “I’ll make breakfast, too.”

“Thanks.”

They shared another kiss; both bracing for incoming hardship. Keith stood up pulling Lance along with him and smiled faintly. 

“Get it done, Lance. Don’t let me down.” 

He nodded sharply. “I won’t.”

 

**Departure** .

Apart from Shiro’s mushy baby food, breakfast consisted of a noodle-like starch and seasoned pear-like fruit. Lance lingered at the table, eating slow and enjoying the last bit of quality time together with his family. Keith smiled fondly to himself as Clara chatted, peppering Lance with stray questions over his mission in between regaling him with her latest Wellspring adventures. She had stood up, leaning into Lance’s shoulder as she shared her story.

It was hard to imagine no more Lance at the table; just Keith and the kids. 

Keith supposed it wasn’t going to truly sink in until it actually happened. For now, he got to see Lance casually wiping the mushy mess off their six month old’s face as he teased their daughter into giggles. He kept Shiro entertained as well as he fed him. Fatherhood was just so natural for him; even the most stressful parts of child rearing he handled with aplomb. On the other hand, Keith stumbled his way through everything, bulldozer like. Keith tried to ignore the inner voice telling him that he was woefully unprepared. 

Mostly he took his cues from Lance on how to deal with their kids. What was he supposed to do with him gone?  He wasn’t gonna get it right with Clara and Shiro. 

Keith busied himself with fruit and tried to reason with himself that maybe he was overthinking it. He wasn’t as befuddled or frightened this time around. That meant that he had learned, right? He had the hang of it, he could do it. Shiro gurgled at him from his perch on Lance’s lap. He pursed his lips and blew, spattering his mouthful of grains over himself as he wriggled for Keith’s attention.

“Are you sharing with papi??” Keith cooed, “Did you take care of that one annoying clean spot??” He grabbed the nearest burp cloth which he kept a bunch tucked away everywhere in the house and leaned in, wiping his son with one since his bib was already a soggy mess. Lance briefly looked away from Clara to plant a few loud kisses on Keith’s cheek before turning right back and asking Clara another absurd question making her groan in exasperated amusement. “ _ Papi, noo, ughhh, why would we do that?? _ ”

Keith tried to repress his worries as he flashed a smile at Clara. He wasn’t going to let his scent sour from fear. He was determined to send Lance off with nothing less than strength and encouragement   

But his confidence waned later, seeing Lance in his flight suit while he remained in civilian clothes. The secured sniper gear, recently modified and cleaned was now in the transport. There were no accompanying armor or weapons for Keith. Instead, Keith had his precious kids to hang on to. He held Shiro a little tighter and winked at Clara as the transport accelerated towards the drop off. 

He felt Lance pull him closer by the waist and watched as he pointed out famous mosaics to their daughter who was perched on his lap. The space port, an immense structure made of native cobb came into view. There were hundreds of spacecrafts zooming in and out of the port, many were hovering in place awaiting their landing clearance. It reminded Keith of bees swarming around a hive.  

They left the crowds behind as their home’s transport sped along the travel ramps towards the defense hubs that stood apart from the main air traffic. It came to a smooth stop in front of the dirt path that led to the underground entrance of a landing pad. 

There were people at the mouth of the entrance.

Clara gasped, standing up excitedly, “That is uncle Hunk and uncle Shiro! Aunt Pidge too and Romelle!” She bounced on her feet, impatiently waiting for the safety canopy to release. Once the hull dematerialized she leapt out of the transport and ran straight into Shiro’s waiting arms.  

“Aw, you guys came!” said Lance as he stepped out of the transport with Keith and gear in tow.

“Yeah of course we came.” Hunk replied easily after giving their daughter a big hug, “We gotta send you off right.”

“Allura and Lotor could not leave their duties. They will contact you in flight with their well wishes.” Announced Romelle primly as she eyed their son, “As will Coran,” Her short stint at sereneness was over, 

“Is that what baby human galra look like?” She was suddenly standing by Keith’s shoulder wiggling her finger at his son, “He still doesn’t look anything like Shiro??? Hello, Not Shiro, aren’t you adorable? Yes you are! Yes you are!”

“Why would he look like Shiro?” Asked Keith very dryly. Did Romelle not know what she was implying?

“Why would you name him Shiro if he will not look like Shiro?” She pointed out the flaws, as their son grinned gummily at her, entertained by her antics. “Not one lock of silver hair, no scar, no square chin. Would not  _ Actually Lance _ better suit? We can call him Al for short. Aren’t you the cutest Al?!”

And Keith was done with the discussion, he rolled his eyes and walked away, catching up with the rest of the group as they made their way to the tarmac. 

Each step forward made it more real. Stray thoughts quieted. Lance took his hand and squeezed as two small spacecraft came into view. 

Clara was between Pidge and Hunk, she had hooked her arms in theirs.  She gasped at seeing the spacecrafts, “That’s Olkari tech! Uncle Hunk! Aunt Pidge, look!” She peeled away, managing to grab Pidge’s hand and hauling her along for a few steps before Pidge stopped her so they would stay close to the group. They huddled together as they pointed at the different sections of the spacecraft, talking pros and cons about the Olkari components. 

Shiro pitched his voice high and soft as he asked,“Who’s a cute little baby?!” He patted Keith on his back as a greeting while cheerfully stealing his son from his arms, making Keith feel oddly empty handed. He crossed his arms and watched in amusement as Shiro and Romelle made their way to Lance all the while cooing and making faces at his baby.

Hunk sidled up next to him and gave him a side nudge, “How are you doing, buddy?”

Keith smiled reassuringly, “I’m fine, Hunk.”

He watched his daughter give Lance sidelong glances before she told Pidge she’d be back and headed towards her dad.

“Princesa.” Lance broke away from Shiro and Romelle, sweeping Clara into his arms for one last big hug, saying, “[You gonna miss me?]”

Clara smiled. “[Can I text you, papi]?”

“[I won’t get your texts baby but I would be so happy to have a whole bunch of them to read when I’m on my way back.]”

She nodded weakly, her smile growing shaky and big fat tears welling up in her eyes. It seemed that reality was sinking in. She crumpled in Lance’s arms, sobbing on his shoulder. 

“Princesa!” said both Keith and Lance in concern. Keith heard a few  _ aw’s _ from their friends as Lance smiled softly and hugged his daughter tight. Keith was by their side in an instant.

“You’re okay, baby.” said Lance.

“I don’t want you to go.” She whisper-cried.

Keith was heartbroken to see his little girl hurting. She was old enough to understand things better. Goodbyes had a deeper meaning. He suppressed the urge to grab her up himself.

He huddled in close, brushing her hair back as he whispered, “I know it’s not easy, princesa. It’s okay for you to cry.”

“What if something happens?” She asked anxiously.

God, he didn’t want to offer her fake platitudes or promises he couldn’t keep. Keith swallowed as he glanced at Lance who looked about ready to cry for Clara. He had to give his alpha some time to get it together for their daughter’s sake so he kept the reins and tried to soothe her as he said, “Papi is really good at what he does. He is going to do everything he can to stay safe and protect all of us. I know it’s scary but we’re gonna help each other through this okay?”

She nodded, sniffling.

“I’m gonna miss you so much.” Lance wiped at his eyes surreptitiously and squeezed her tight. “I’m gonna think about you, Shiro, and mami, every single quintant.” He meandered away, talking softly to her, giving her a last bit of quality time together. 

“I’ll visit you at least once a movement.” Shiro promised gently to Keith as he wandered close again with his nephew in his arms who was watching Lance and Clara with wide eyes and ‘ba-ba-ing’ as if talking quietly to himself over the situation.

Keith peeled his eyes away from his bondmate and daughter to raise an eyebrow at his friend, “Don’t go out of your way. You don’t have to worry about me.”

It seemed everyone within earshot turned to frown at Keith as Shiro said, “We’re gonna worry about you. It’s what friends do. Don’t shut us out.”

Hunk crossed his arms, shoving Keith lightly and saying in his disarming, good-natured way, “He can’t shut me out. I’m not shutmeouttable.”

Pidge pulled herself up on a railing by Romelle and met Keith’s eyes as she said, “When you need us to go though, we’ll go but we wanna be there for you.”

Lance was the one leaving yet everyone was worried about him. He felt a little insulted that his friends didn’t think he could make it without Lance but he bit his tongue and tried to just accept the well meaning intent. “...Thanks.”

Shiro squeezed his shoulder. “We’re family Keith, you gotta know that by now.” 

Keith’s smile turned rueful, “I know.”

“Besides.” Shiro said, “Why wouldn’t I want to see my niece and nephew more often??” He added as he laid a flurry of kisses on his nephew’s cheeks. 

“Aww, look at space-dad.” Said Hunk. They watched as Shiro joined Lance who gave Clara one more kiss and set her down. Lance grabbed his son from Shiro, beelining towards Keith as he tickled and nuzzled their son.

Keith swallowed. He made sure to smile at Lance when their eyes met. This was really it. Goodbye. Hunk silently took Shiro from Lance and played with him, turning away from Lance and Keith.

Lance looked really good in his flight suit. Tall and relaxed as he closed in on Keith, and leaned in until their foreheads touched. They simply breathed in each other’s scent, savoring each other’s company.

“I love you.” Lance’s lips were almost touching his when he said it. 

“I love you too.” Keith replied quietly.

Lance pulled back and smiled gently. “Who do you belong to?”

“Myself, you dick.”

The smile transformed into a grin as he landed a hard slap on Keith’s ass. “Right.”

Keith smirked back as Lance began to step backwards towards the spacecraft. 

“I’ll escort you to the rendezvous.” Called out Shiro. 

He clapped Lance’s shoulder while Hunk and Pidge crowded Keith.

Keith picked up his son from Hunk, settling him on his hip as he held a hand out for Clara who ran to him. He squeezed his daughter’s hand tight as he watched Lance and Shiro go past Romelle towards the spacecrafts. 

His stomach grew tight as he watched his bondmate board the spacecraft.

The ceiling hatch unlocked, revealing a bright alien sky as Lance powered up the craft. The whole gang waved and cheered Lance but his eyes remained locked with his omega.

Keith poured all of his steady conviction and confidence into his smile. He knew what Lance was capable of.

_ I’m so proud of you. You can do it. We’ll be here waiting for you. _

Lance winked at him right before materializing his helmet visor. The sunglare made it impossible to see any more of him through the cockpit. Keith held his breath as he watched the small, agile spacecrafts ascend to the skies. They pitched sharply and winked out of sight.

No more Lance.

Keith let out a slow deep breath.

Come what may. 

 

**_Five phoebs to go._ **

Clara was to call Keith every day when she had been secured in the family transport by a Wellspring minder and on her way home. Keith could feel his son’s eyes on him as he spoke to Clara; his baby sought him out even when being schlepped around the kitchen by his favorite uncle. The good news was that he was growing so absorbed in his uncle’s cheerful responses to his gibberish that he was checking in on Keith less and less. 

At the next delighted laugh Keith made his quiet escape. He slipped out of the kitchen and flattened himself against the wall, holding his breath as he waited for the usual meltdown.

None was forthcoming. His baby kept gurgling along happily. A whole dobosh passed by with no panicked crying. 

Keith breathed a sigh of relief and snuck away to his bedroom cove where he promptly dropped onto his bed swing and laid there the way he landed, unmoving and savoring the precious few seconds of alone time. With Lance around he could break away from the overstimulation of everything and recharge in solitude but he wasn’t afforded that anymore. It was hard to not be a people person and be under the constant barrage of being around others non-stop.

If he wasn’t at his communal post in touch with colleagues then he was with the kids or outside running errands and at the mercy of strangers. There was never any downtime from people, just a thousand interactions to match the thousand things to do. Speaking of, there was no time to do the thousand things that needed to be done. How do single parents get everything done? Keith needed to get better. He burrowed further into the pillows.  

“So. More Wellspring leftovers?” Shiro called out from the kitchen. 

Keith groaned quietly. Shiro had a talent for saying things that came across as lightly teasing and a touch disappointed. 

“Yeah, help yourself.” He yelled back, purposely missing Shiro’s point entirely. 

His friend was there at least once a movement like he promised and he was a big help but he was also a very irritating house guest. He had a penchant for  _ nagging _ Keith as if he were his dad; always judging and mildly admonishing him for not living up to his standards.

His shoulders stiffened as he heard Shiro’s narrative to his son getting louder. They were heading his way. So much for alone time. Keith flipped around and flung an arm over his eyes, grinning in amusement at Shiro’s high-pitched sotto, “Mami works really hard to make things right for you and Clara, huh? Isn’t that right? That’s why you’re so cute, isn’t? Isn’t it?!” 

His baby was responding with lip bubbles and bursts of babbling.

Keith heard him sit down in a nearby chair and snuck a peek at him. Shiro was a big, brawny alpha with kindly eyes and an even-keeled disposition. He seemed to adore his role as uncle to Keith’s kids, relishing any time where he could escape the castleship and Lotor in this tentative peace era. Universal stability seemed to be truly solidifying meaning retirement may be possible for Shiro too if he wanted it. 

Keith was growing more and more sure that Shiro remained at the helm only out of a sense of duty.  One day soon, he would be done.

Shiro had his son in his hands, holding him up and surprising him into delighted giggles as he repeatedly dove at his tummy, gently exclaiming, “ah boo!” He looked as thrilled as his namesake.

Keith chuckled. Shiro would definitely be done soon. “You wanna borrow him?”

“Can I?” He asked as he settled his nephew on his lap. Shiro chuckled at Keith’s suddenly nervous expression. “Not sure which one of you is more adorable.”

Keith rolled his eyes. He swung casually on his bed. “Shut up.”

Shiro chuckled, “When is your next grocery pick up?”

Of course, he didn’t drop it. Keith tried not to look too irritated as he said, “Soon.” 

Shiro smiled sympathetically, “I get it. I know it’s hard trying to keep up with everything. I just happen to know the meals here don’t supply the nutrients human or Galra require. You might be starving yourself and Clara and not even know it.”

Keith stuck his arm over his eyes again, grunting, “I know. I’ll stock up soon.” He was also not that great of a cook. Lance usually took care of that. His daughter was going to have to suffer through a bunch of bland or oddly flavored sandwiches if they were going to rely on his cooking skills instead of the communal share.

“You could ask the Wellspring to send certain ingredients instead of prepared meals. I know they accommodate requests, you just have to ask.”

“Yeah.” Keith replied dispassionately. He had to actually figure out what were the nutrients they needed. Then he had to figure out what nutrients were equivalent or came close on the planet and then he would have to look at what was available and out of that, sort out how to prepare them. He knew the kind of baby food they were feeding Shiro but he wished he had paid closer attention to what Lance cooked. He felt terribly guilty that he wasn’t sending Clara in with homemade lunches which was actually necessary for her.

Maybe Shiro could read his mind because he said, “Hunk’s looking into the kinds of food available for you here. He’ll send a list to you. If you inform the Wellspring, they could pick those out for you or make specialized meals that are better suited for you and Clara.”

“Thank you.” He meant it. He was going to tell Lance what a nice break they caught then froze at the ridiculousness of that. Lance wasn’t there. His bed was cold and lonely at night. There wasn’t anyone there to gripe about his day or get some sympathy or comfort from.  Right. 

“You hanging in there?” Asked Shiro quietly. He must’ve caught the change in his scent.

His son started reaching for him, whining plaintively. He smiled at his baby and picked him up, hoping he could entertain him with cuddles and a teething toy. Baby Shiro was prone to sudden mood changes going from belly-laughter one tick to screaming his head off the next. Keith was pretty sure it was his teeth coming in though he was still much fussier than Clara ever was as a baby.

He was so adorable though. Look at him sitting upright all by himself for a few ticks. Keith smiled to himself.

“Yeah, thanks.” He replied. “Clara’s been really… well-behaved.” As in not debating everything. It was odd and it worried him.

“She’s always well behaved. She’s a good girl.”

Keith smirked. Clara was all sweetness and good manners when it came to Shiro. Not so much with her parents or Hunk or Pidge. “Yeah.”

He heard the quiet hiss of the family transport docking at their travel bay and his daughter calling out, “Mami?”

“Hi baby. In here.”

She showed up shortly, greeted her uncle with a hug and climbed onto the bedswing on the other side of Keith who kissed her as she pulled out her tablet to show him her assigned activities. “How was Wellspring? What did you do today?”

“We helped the elders customize their news. It was fun.” She said serenely, “I have a current event puzzle. See?”

Looked like an alien current event story where she had to figure out its origin so she could search the right databases in order to learn the details to complete the interactive story. Completing current events unlocked points that her team could use towards completing their major tech project. She was probably going to need some help.

Shiro swooped in, picking up his nephew as he stood over Clara’s shoulder, looking at her tablet. “That sounds like fun? Mind if I help?”

“Sure!” She stood up and showed him the story puzzle. 

“Oh, I definitely want to help.” said Shiro. “How about you go change while I fix us something to eat and then we can go over it together?”

She glanced at Keith as if she was worried he would be upset that she was favoring her uncle over him. He nodded encouragingly.

“Okay!”

“Alright, let’s go!”

Shiro looked back at Keith once Clara had hurried off to her room.

“I got this, Keith. Take a break.”

He had such a long day dealing with bizarre demands at his post. Home had a bunch of laundry and cleaning he had to do which he hated very much. Both his kids needed medic checks soon and he had to prepare the cove for winter. Not to mention he had maybe three varga worth of sleep because Shiro was waking up screaming at night. And he had to try and spend some time on some sort of activity with the neighborhood elders assigned to him as it was culturally expected for him to do so. He didn’t even remember most of their names.

“Thank you.” Keith said so very grateful. He waited until Shiro shut the door behind him before he slumped back and instantly fell asleep.

 

**_Four phoebs to go_ **

Pidge’s visits were less guilt-ridden for him but a bit agitating. She was more like someone to hang out with than someone that could help him out with stuff which he would absolutely appreciate if there wasn’t so much he had to take care of for himself and his kids. He couldn’t just hang and chat the whole time. 

His baby demanded a lot of attention. He had to bring him to his post every quintant because he was teething again and unconsolable at the Wellspring. His caretakers felt it was best for the baby to be with his mother during the teething period. It was a frustrating thing about the particular civilization, all babysitting was done by the Wellspring so if they refused to babysit, then he had no other options unless his Voltron friends were around. 

They also had some say on all kids that lived on planet though typically they deferred to the parents’ wishes and merely recommended actions or activities. 

It was common to bring children to any kind of post, apart from defense, and all posts would accommodate parents as needed however, Keith was simply losing his mind being attached to the hip with Shiro while trying to do his post duties. His baby was drooling all over him the whole time and was extremely clingy. He would scream if Keith so much as strapped him to his back in a carrier instead of cuddled to his chest.

Shiro had fallen asleep at last while Pidge helped Clara with her assignments. They were both going on engineering tangents that had nothing to do with the work so it was taking all night to get the assignment completed. Clara should go to bed soon.  Keith took a deep breath and went back out towards the kitchen, hoping to grab a bite to eat before joining his daughter and friend at the hearthcove.

At least Pidge didn’t care or chide him over his lack of tidiness. Apart from areas where he would put Shiro down, he had a bit of a cluttered mess in his hands. Hunk and Shiro would help him clean up but Pidge simply didn’t realize that it was something she could help him with. She probably didn’t even noticed it. Keith was afraid of what her helping out with the cove would look like anyway. 

However, she did  keep up with Clara’s cheerful non-stop talking about the guts of some spacecraft or another. Keith mustered as much enthusiasm as he could when the monologue was directed at him but he didn’t care one whit about mechanics or engineering and it was hard to keep up the pretense especially when he was just so tired all the time. He admitted guiltily to himself that his kids didn’t get his best self. 

He sat in front of Pidge and Clara as he choked down a few celery-like stalks so that there was at least something in his stomach. 

“Hey.” Said Pidge.

“Hey. How is that assignment going?”

Clara smiled, waving her tablet victoriously. “We’re done!” Quiznak. Thank god.

The laundry chimed just as he settled in and said, “Good job!”

“I’ll get that mami.”

Keith hesitated. He wasn’t going to discourage her if she felt like doing extra chores. “Thank you, princesa. Just dump the clothes in the guestcove and go get ready for bed.” The unit would automatically sort and launder the next pile of clothes that were in the chute once the cleaned clothes were removed.

“Okay.” She said agreeably and hopped up, giving him a kiss goodnight before heading towards the laundering unit.

“She’s a cute kid.” Pidge said as she picked up their snack bowls and dropped them off in the kitchen sanitizer. 

“Thanks.”

She grabbed her vid when she got back and started scrolling through it. “The Wellspring has a few extracurricular engineering tracks you might want to put her in. I checked them out. I’m sending them to you. I think she would like that.”

That made sense.  “Thanks, Pidge.”

“Sure.” She hesitated, “Hunk asked me to ask you if there is anything I can do for you before I go.” Pidge said grudgingly.

Keith smirked, amused. “You wanna raise my kids?”

Pidge smiled. “No. You’re doing a really good job with them. They’re really cute.”

“Thanks Pidge. I appreciate that.”

She shrugged as she gathered her stuff in her bag and sat next to him. “It’s true, suprisingly. Who knew crank-y shout-y Keith would have it in him.” She was smiling as she said it.

He smiled back though secretly he fretted that sometimes he felt like he was just going through the motions raising them. He did try hard not to scar his kids with his own short-tempered stupidity. 

“You’re doing okay though?” She wondered. “Your scent is always low-key stressed.”

“I’m hanging in there.” To be honest he had not known just how dependent he had been on Lance. It was distressing that he felt so stressed without him and it had only been two phoebs. At night, Keith clung to the scent charms he had collected from Lance, taking what little comfort he could in his alpha’s scent. He missed him. 

He missed co-parenting but he just missed him as his bondmate. Being silly and trading insults and practical jokes. Sharing stories about their kids and just talking. Keith shifted. He also missed taking comfort in the heat of his body and welcoming touch. He was touch starved for his alpha. He wanted him back. 

Keith took a deep breath and let it out slow and quiet.

Pidge patted his knee. “I’ll be back soon. Call me anytime if you need to talk.”

“Will do. You can stay the night if you want.”

She shook her head. “I’ll just borrow your transport for my trip to the spaceport if you don’t mind. I need to get back early.”

“Yeah of course, no problem. Thanks for coming.”

Pidge hugged him tightly. “Any time. I’ll see you soon.”

He nodded and watched her board the transport from the indoor bay. He waved goodbye as the doors shut and the transport sped away.

Keith got up and headed towards the bathroom, planning to tuck his kids in afterwards. He passed by the guestcove and smiled at his daughter who was in the room, diligently folding baby clothes.

_ Wait. What???  _ He backtracked and watched her in stunned silence. Laundry was the most boring chore to her. What was she doing?

Keith tensed as things suddenly clicked into place. 

His daughter was incredibly obedient and helpful ever since Lance left. Clara started waking up early and making them breakfast (a type of cereal). Sometimes he would accidentally nod off while she talked mechanics and she would merely stop talking and not complain at all. She always tried to cheer Shiro up if he started crying after Keith set him down.

Keith could kick himself, he should’ve realized what was happening earlier. His nine year old was trying to cover for his bondmate’s absence. 

_ No _ . 

He wasn’t having it.  Keith thought fast and hurried to his cove where he dug out one of her wrapped birthday presents. 

He came back and rapped quietly on the door, getting her attention. He smiled and offered his hand to her, “Hey. Come here a sec.” 

He led her out of guestcove and back into the hearth. Keith sat down and surprised her by pulling her into his lap. “Hi, princesa.” He said cheerfully.

“Hi mami...” Clara replied a little anxiously.

“So I was thinking of giving you your birthday present early.”

She loved gifts, there wasn’t a quicker way to get unbridled child enthusiasm from her than to shamelessly bribe her with gifts. He smiled as she perked up in excitement. 

“Okay!”

He wrapped her up in a hug before pulling back just enough to smile at her. His poor child. “I want you to promise me something first.”

“What?” She asked worriedly.

“From now on, I want you to be Clara not papi. Just because papi is not here doesn’t mean I want you to try to take his place. Can you do that for me?”

She looked at him pensively. 

He smirked just before tickling at her ribs causing her to clench her arms around her waist protectively. “Mami! No!” She giggled. He jumped to her armpits, ruthlessly tickling as she chortled, “Noooo.”

“Can you promise me?”

“Okay, okay!!” She yelped. 

He gave her a big kiss and settled her next to him, wrapping an arm around her shoulder. She seemed to slump a little in relief, wiping at her laugh tears.

“I mean it okay?” He said kindly to her. “Papi wouldn’t want you to try and be him. I swear I got this, princesa. All I want from you is for you to finish your assignments, do your chores, and laugh at my jokes if I have any.”

She nodded and gave him a watery smile though her eyes twinkled more mischievously then they’ve had in a while. “But you’re not funny, mami.”   
  
“Thanks a lot.”

She huffed in amusement as she sniffled.

Keith handed her his birthday gift. “Open it. Hurry. Hurry.” He coaxed.

She grinned as she tore into the giftwrap. 

“Papi’s spacecraft!” She said. 

“Yup.” 

She inspected the toy model box carefully before diving in.

Clara  immediately began snapping pieces together without bothering with the instructions.  She rested her head on Keith’s side, content to be held as she worked. She pointed out the different components and their functions as she assembled the pieces. All the while she seemed to be letting go of some tension as if through a slow-release valve. Keith breathed a silent sigh of release of his own and squeezed her.

Halfway through, Clara slowed down, burrowing further into Keith’s side. “[I miss papi…]” She said quietly; she hadn’t spoken Spanish in a while since she usually reserved her bilingual rambling for her dad. The wishful plea in her words was obvious. 

Keith felt a pang in his heart that he couldn’t protect her from this. His daughter wanted her dad back. He was an integral part of her life and he was just gone. Lance’s absence was as hard on her as it was on Keith.

“[I miss him too.]” Keith said quietly,  “I’ve got an idea. Why don’t we fix ourselves cups of smoked starnut and queue up another text for papi? You can sleepover with me tonight.”

She smiled, greatly cheered to spend quality time with Keith while doing something for her dad, “Okay!”

He smiled back and held his daughter close, watching her rub at her eyes sleepily as she worked. He answered the stray questions she had about Lance’s mission as well he could and babied her as much as she would allow.

 

**_Three phoebs to go_ **

“ _ Hunk _ .”

Keith sat down in front of his friend and immediately confessed his terrible deeds. Last night, Clara was simply talking about her favorite things and he snapped angrily at her, shouted at her to give it a rest. Thrown a spoon he had in hand down on the table in frustration. Shiro had startled so badly, his little body flailed as he burst into tears.  

At that moment, he had been at wit’s end...

Hunk winced. “Aw, maybe it wasn’t as bad as you thought it was?”

“It was that bad.” He agonized. He squeezed his eyes shut as he relived the guilt-ridden memory. Oh how his daughter had stiffened. How she paled and how her cheerfulness transformed to scared hurt. She had said, “Okay mami.” afraid of provoking any more of his ire and quietly trembled as her eyes grew damp. She had pushed her bowl back and slipped out of the room without another word. 

Keith had picked up Shiro but couldn’t move further. Couldn’t even go after her and apologize.

“Hunk.” He dropped his face into his hands. “I’m a piece of shit.” He wasn’t built for around the clock cuteness. The non stop need for him to be at his best and motherly was draining. Keith was gentle all the time when it wasn’t in his nature. His brain was screaming for adult conversation or wit to parry with and was getting nothing but sugary innocence for him to protect. 

Sometimes on route to his post, when everything was too much, he would let loose a string of curse words and insults just to get it out. Just to make sure that he was still capable and to feel better.  

Keith adored his kids’ innocence and sweetness yet was ready to choke from it all at the same time. 

He was utter trash.

Hunk placed a cup of spiced nut milk in front of him.

“Did you apologize?”

He shook his head. He settled his hands around the cup. “Shiro kept crying. I didn’t want to go to her with him screaming in my arms. By the time I got him settled she was asleep and I was just exhausted..I..” He was just making excuses. “No, I didn’t apologize.” His daughter deserved an apology, he didn’t want to gloss over the whole episode and leave things unsettled.

Hunk smiled kindly at him. “Yeah, so all of that was definitely kind of bad. Sometimes this stuff just happens especially with family. All you can do is keep trying.”

Keith nodded miserably then snorted derisively when Hunk added, “You’re a good mom.” 

“I mean it. Look, why don’t I make her favorite dish and you go pick her up? I’ll keep Shiro. We’ll go somewhere so you can spend some time with Clara.”

Keith bit his lip. “What do I even say.” How does he even face his little girl?

“No matter what, you’re still mom. Just talk to her about it and apologize. Tell her you love her.  It’ll be okay.”

Keith nodded and took a sip of spiced milk.

 

**_Two phoebs to go_ **

Keith eyed the incoming transport notification suspiciously. He wasn’t expecting any visitors. 

He pinged the transport and received an immediate response, the screen revealing two figures wrapped in heavy shawls. He recognized one of them instantly, his eyebrows going up in surprise.

“Lotor?” And a planet native...? Lotor smirked at him, “Greetings, Keith.” The stranger sat on the edge of her seat, grinning excitedly, “Keith, I am so glad to see you!” The stranger’s face morphed into a familiar one. Allura! Keith grinned as she continued, “I hope we’re not intruding. I apologize that we could not notify you of our visit. We had to implement rather extreme cloak and dagger measures to  make our way here.”

Their stature as former leaders of the alliance and now heads of state for the Galra-Altean commonwealth meant they were always in the public eye of the universe. “Not a problem. See you soon.” He waved and ended the connection. 

He then froze when he noted the state of his home. Shit, it was a mess. “Clara! Help, quick!” He yelped as he grabbed a pile of laundry and shoved it down the unit’s chute. He recruited his daughter and scrambled to clean up.

Things looked sort of decent by the time they arrived, Allura coming in for a hug as soon as the bay door opened.

“Keith, you look wonderful!” She said as she let go. “I’ve missed you!”

He smiled, “I missed you too. It’s good to see you.”  

“Clara!” She said and gave her a hug as well. “Look how much you have grown! You’re beautiful!” 

Clara smiled appreciatively, “Hi, Aunt Allura! Thank you!”

“She looks so much like you. Where is Shiro?” Allura asked as she stepped aside and joined Keith in watching Clara head for Lotor. He had stepped out of the transport much more serenely than his wife.  They both smirked in amusement as he eyed Clara warily. 

“Shiro’s taking a nap.” Keith said distractedly and stifled his chuckle. Clara was staring up at Lotor, “Hi, uncle Lotor.”

Nothing made Lotor more uncomfortable than interacting with children. Which was likely why kids seemed to hone in on him. 

“Clara. You look…well.” 

“Thank you.” She said and threw her arms around him. He patted her head awkwardly and stiffened when she took his hand and hauled him towards a kickscooter-like toy she was building for herself and a friend.

Keith traded amused looks with Allura. “Does anyone know you’re here?” He took her and Lotor’s shawls, gesturing for her to sit in the hearthcove.

”No.” Allura said mischievously. “Coran, Romelle and Axca are having a fit. I will ping them back shortly.”

“They probably deserve to sweat some.”

She laughed. “They absolutely deserve to sweat some.”

Keith sat next to her, smirking as he watched Lotor awkwardly begin to assist Clara with her build. He asked Allura, “How are things?”

“Things are progressing nicely. We are closer yet to a framework for interstellar peace.” 

“Your hair is so soft??” They both looked up in time to catch Clara holding a fistful of Lotor’s long, white hair and rubbing it against her cheek. Keith pressed his lips firmly together. He should really tell her not to do that without asking permission but that would mean no more of that priceless expression on Lotor’s face.

“His hair is  _ very _ soft.” Remarked Allura,  “I believe it is due to that silk bonnet he wears at night.”

That’s it, forget it. Keith raised his fist in front of his mouth to hide his stifled laughter. Lotor raised an eyebrow and stared at Allura, expression dry. “Perhaps you have mistaken me for one of the mice you insist on sharing our bed with. I am certain Romelle has tailored a full wardrobe for each of your beloved creatures, bonnet and all.”

“That is true and you are quite indistinguishable from mice, I agree.”

Keith snorted, he forgot how silly Lotor and Allura could be. 

Lotor hit back smoothly, “Your lovely eyes have succumbed to your majestic age.” He said haughtily, “We will have you checked at the earliest convenience.”

Keith laughed, feeling almost wistful. Allura brought out the lighter side of Lotor the way Lance did with him. Their banter ( _ highfalutin banter _ , Lance would call it) made him miss his bondmate badly. He was surprised how much he missed being one half of a couple.

Allura turned to Keith, “Forget him, I will divorce him later.” Her eyes softened sympathetically as she took his hand, “How are things for you?”

Well, his baby had been sick recently. He picked up a bug at the Wellspring that caused big blue rashes all over his body and zapped his energy. Treatment was medicated sponge baths and a daily vaporizer. He was so lethargic, he’d lay docile in Keith’s arms and let him place the vapor mask over his nose and mouth with no fuss. It made Keith’s heart hurt to see his son so listless when he was usually a giggling bundle of energy. 

On the homecove front, the family transport broke down so Keith had to get a repair scheduled (and his daughter  _ away _ ) and queue a week’s worth of public transports which weren’t reliable as he was at the mercy of whoever was was signed up before him. 

And he still hadn’t scheduled dedicated activities with the elders which meant the neighborhood would start subtly shunning him, meaning less help in de-winterizing the cove.  Worse than that, his daughter who finally had friends her age, would be shunned too. He had to at least give each of the elders a call this movement and make sure they were okay.

He also had to figure out how to make time to join family activities with his daughter at the Wellspring,

And on a personal front, he should have had a heat but nothing so far. He would’ve been showing by now if he had conceived with Lance though that should’ve been almost impossible if Lance was on birth control. Keith took a pregnancy test at the Wellspring anyway and confirmed he wasn’t pregnant.

Keith swallowed as he wondered how to answer Allura’s question. He decided to sum it up, simply. “It’s been hectic.”

 

**_One phoeb to go_ ** .

Keith sat cross-legged on the floor of the hearthcove, thrumming with energy. He glanced at the recorder drone again to confirm it was active. Shiro had gotten so close to walking all alone. He was cruising all over the place from furniture to furniture. 

Keith stretched his arms out, grinning at his son who was hanging onto an end table and grinning back. “Shiro! Come here, Shiro!” He enticed.

“Mama!” Shiro said, then seemed to gauge the distance between them and giggled a little nervously. 

“Shiiiiro. You want to come to mami? Come to mami, Shiro!”

Shiro flailed his little fist at him, grinning. Keith beckoned with his hands. “C’mon Shiro! You can do it! Come to mami!”

Shiro surprised him by suddenly throwing caution to the wind and going for it. He stomped forward, arms flailing at his sides as he toddled recklessly towards his mom. His eyes widened in cartoon-like horror as he lost his balance.

Keith laughed gleefully as he caught him, sweeping him up in his arms. “Good job! Papi would be so proud!” 

He blew raspberries on Shiro’s tummy, until his son was letting loose gut-deep peels of laughter. Keith laughed some more as he hugged his son tight. “You’re so good!” He reached back for a projecting picture frame and switched it on. A portrait of Lance smiling materialized in front of them.

“Do you know who that is?” Keith asked his son.

Shiro giggled so Keith had to rain kisses on his cheeks because that was too cute.

“Who is that, Shiro? Do you know?”

“Papa.”

“Yeah, papi!” Keith cheered. “Good job!! Can you say bye-bye to papi?”

Shiro waved at the projection, saying, “Bye bye!”

Keith beamed in pride, squeezed him and waved too. They both grinned at the drone as it hovered over the projection, capturing their waves and smiles. Keith ended the recording, thrilled that he was able to capture that much for Lance.

He was walking on air for the rest of the quintant.

That evening after tucking Clara in, he smiled to himself as went to his bedcove. Shiro was sleeping through the night again. Keith was tired but at least he had a good quintant and might possibly catch a few extra varga of sleep.

He slipped into his bed swing and closed his eyes.

“Mami?” Clara whispered.

“Mm?” Keith asked, disoriented. 

Some hours must’ve past as it felt like deep night. He confirmed it when he rolled over and looked at his clock. He was so tired, but Clara was a sound sleeper and never bothered him at night. “What is it?”

“I don’t feel good.”  She mumbled from the other side of the door.

He sat up, scrubbing the sleep from his eyes. He switched on a night lamp as he said, “Come in, baby.” 

She walked in, sniffling, and hugging her pillow. 

“What’s wrong?” Keith asked in concern.

“My stomach hurts.”

He wiped her tears. The Wellspring reported that she had been somewhat withdrawn lately but she was fine physically. 

“Come here, lie down for a bit.” He helped her climb into his bed and smiled down at her as he bundled her up in blankets. “Lets see if it gets any better.”

He took her hand, rubbing his thumb over her knuckles. 

They laid there in silence for a short while.

“Mami?” Clara whispered, eventually.

He was so tired, he tried to focus. “Mm?”

“What if they kill papi?”

Keith was suddenly wide awake as he focused hard on his daughter, frowning in concern. It was so unfair that his daughter had to suffer for the choices he and Lance made. That she might lose her dad for a greater good when there were so many people out there that have never sacrificed anything at all. She didn’t even have a choice in the matter.

Keith tucked her into his chest and breathed in his child’s scent. He closed his eyes and said with all the firm conviction he felt deep inside, “Papi will move mountains to get back to us, princesa.” 

She nodded.

Clara fell asleep in her mother’s arms.

 

**_Time_ **

He hadn’t told his daughter but Keith knew the exact date he was supposed to hear back from Lance or his handlers.

He felt growing excitement and trepidation as the date neared.

Rationalized and silently worried as the date passed by and more dates passed by.

Lance had not shown up when he was supposed to. Shiro sent Keith a message every day, confirming the radio silence. Fear and worry consumed Keith; it was in his very breath, it clouded his decisions and twisted his thoughts. Every tick that passed enforced an unfathomable reality.

Keith had enough. He got up in the middle of a sleepless night and contacted the castleship. 

Shiro’s gaze was sharp and determined as he answered the call. “Keith.”

“Do you know anything about his mission?”

Shiro hesitated. “Some.”

There was so much Keith needed to say but no words were coming. He needed answers.

Shiro nodded. “We are already searching. I’ll find him, Keith.” 

Keith couldn’t leave his children and go rescue his bondmate. He had to do what was unnatural for him and rely on someone else. The powerlessness, the desperation that he couldn’t articulate threatened to overwhelm. Keith needed answers. He didn’t even know where or who or what or why. He only knew when.

Keith nodded tersely and ended the communication.

 

**_One phoeb overdue_ ** . 

Keith didn’t hear from Shiro for many movements. He busied himself with the needs of his kids. He pushed the fear down deep when he projected a photo of Lance to his son so he wouldn’t forget him. He lied to his daughter and told her Lance wasn’t due to arrive yet. He needed more information.

And one day he got it.

Pidge opened a communication, breaking into his home networking just as Clara arrived from the Wellspring. “Shiro’s got him. Get to the southgate spaceport immediately. Hunk is on route.”

Keith dropped everything, grabbed his children and boarded the family transport. 

The trip to the spaceport was a blur as was the flight off planet.

Keith held his daughter and son as he watched a medical rescue ship come into view. He tried to ignore the acridness of Hunk’s scent.

At the docking bay, they were greeted by Lotor and a tall alien Keith had never met before.

“Clara, come with me.” said Lotor as he took her hand and gently led her away. 

Keith’s heart was beating out of his chest as he and Hunk were led down a crowded hallway by the stranger. There were many eyes on them as they passed by. People made way.

“Lance accomplished his mission” Said the stranger as they hurried. “His deeds have saved us from atrocity _. _ ”

Keith didn’t hear him.

They went through several doors until the stranger ushered them into a private waiting area but did not join them. Allura was already there as was Shiro, both looking grim. The grief in their eyes was obvious as they stood alongside a medic. Keith met the medic’s eyes, stone-faced, refusing to make any assumptions as Shiro took his son, who had at some point begun to cry, and left the waiting area.

The medic did not waste time. She stepped forward and said, “Lance is in critical condition. He suffered catastrophic brain injury during the extraction effort which was compounded by cardiac arrest on route to stasis. Our rescue efforts have temporarily halted further damage. We administered parasitoid biologics and induced circulatory arrest.” 

The medic paused then said gently, “The biologics are a last recourse. The organisms have conserved and partly restored what is left of his brain stem activity. We have kept his body in cold stasis.”

It was all a horrifying litany of useless words. “What are you saying?” Was he dead? Was he fucking dead?

“Lance is on borrowed time. He is in cold stasis however, the organisms are not affected by stasis technology. They keep him alive now but will ultimately progress to the next stage of their lifecycle which would be fatal for Lance.”

Keith took a step back, pushing Hunk’s arm away from him. “What now?” 

“There are options for extended life. Two of them. Option 1, we place him in an Altean stasis chamber and eliminate the infestation. Given his brain activity, it will be decades before he recovers enough for consciousness. His brain activity, the nerve connections, and stored memories will irreparably change. He would survive  but he would not be the Lance you knew.

“Option two?” Keith asked emotionlessly.

“We keep him out of stasis chambers and allow the organisms to work. They are capable of rehabilitating nerve cells and restoring prior connections. If we repress their lifecycle, they may work in tandem with Lance to heal his injuries. However, there is very high risk of sudden death due to the organism’s biology. If he survives, he will require significant rehabilitation therapy.

Keith listened grimly and looked at Allura when she cut in, “I have done what I can for his quintessence but he is far gone Keith.”

The medic added, “You must decide quickly. No action, stasis or repression treatment.”

“How long do I have?”

“Inaction allows him final rest within the varga. If you opt for life extension, a decision within the half varga is critical.“

Keith swallowed. He felt his hands trembling. “Can I see him?”

“Yes. It will be hard to take.” The medic stood aside and gestured at the door behind her.

Keith felt nothing at all as he walked in alone, refusing company.

There was a body on a bed, laying unnaturally still. The projected read-outs indicated no heartbeat. 

Keith took a closer look, stepping forward. A whimper escaped him when he saw for himself that it was Lance. It was his bondmate, covered in a bedsheet from chest to toes. He was disfigured by injury and rescue. The hair on one side of his head was shaved off. The remaining hair was crusted in blood. Lance’s brown skin was tinged blue. He had sensors placed on his temples and chest.

Keith placed a hand over his bondmate’s but yanked it away at the ice-cold touch, somehow not expecting it. He tried again and squeezed his alpha’s hand.

The injury almost looked like it split his body in two. There was bruising and the slight shine of restitched skin. There was no scent to his body.

Keith closed his eyes and pushed away his own grief and trauma. He had a life altering decision to make while his alpha lay in front of him, dying.

He looked at his bondmate again. What would Lance want?

Lance wanted to see his kids again above all else.

Lance did not wish to be resuscitated if his quality of life was poor or non-existent.

Lance took calculated risks.

Keith buried his hands in his bangs, clenching his fingers into fists and holding back his tears.

Lance wanted to be there for his children as they grew up but that meant Keith would risk losing him all together if he went the treatment route.

Stasis would keep him alive. Wasn’t it better to have some part of him instead of nothing at all even if his behavior changes when he regains consciousness? Maybe they would luck out and he wouldn’t suffer much damage long term.

He looked down at Lance again, horrified that he was still there, that this was all real. 

He crossed his arms as his body continued to shake.

Lance would want to have a chance to talk to his children. He would have the ability to do so after stasis though maybe he would be so changed that it wouldn’t matter to him. And Keith didn’t know what kind of toll was expected nor how many decades of stasis. If it was a miserable life, Keith would be going against Lance’s wishes.

Lance was a fighter. Keith was sure he would try to recover with the help of the organisms. If he could survive it...and if he did, what would quality of life be like? He was told he would require extensive rehabilitation.

Keith had to decide. He wiped at his face and walked out of the room.

Pidge had joined his remaining Voltron friends. Shiro was back without his son.

“Where’s Shiro?”

“He’s with Lotor and Clara.”

Keith nodded. He was numb. Desolate as he took a seat on a bench. Allura sat next to him taking his hand in hers and interlacing their fingers. Hunk and Pidge stood behind him,  gripping his shoulder tight.

Shiro sat next to him, hand on his back. 

No words were necessary.

Keith looked down then squeezed his eyes shut tight. He killed his alpha - he was the one that pushed him to go. His life has been irreparably altered.  Keith could only pray to higher beings he didn’t believe in that he makes the best possible choice for his alpha.

He looked up at the medic that stood before him.

“Start the treatment.”


	3. Move Mountains

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> How odd that watching Lance’s fight for life became part of his normal routine. People that came to know of Keith’s situation, first the Wellspring then his neighbors, would tell him that he was so strong for enduring the way he did but it wasn’t like he had other options. He had no choice but to bear it. Life didn’t stop for anyone. He had to do what he had to do to stay afloat.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Heartache folks but fear not, you already know how things turned out. Warnings: Difficult subject matter overall. The biggest warning I have is that Lance will do something inappropriate in front of his kids because of brain injury. The family deals with it. This chapter is the peak of hardship in Who We Are. :)
> 
> Also, please excuse the usual initial roughness. I'll clean it up some at some point.

How odd that watching Lance’s fight for life became part of his normal routine. People that came to know of Keith’s situation, first the Wellspring then his neighbors, would tell him that he was so strong for enduring the way he did but it wasn’t like he had other options. He had no choice but to bear it. Life didn’t stop for anyone. He had to do what he had to do to stay afloat.

He had kids he was trying to raise, he had to contribute to the community to keep his social debt at bay and he had to maintain his household. He wanted his home to be a sanctuary for his kids and not some horrible, depressing thing to return to at the end of the quintant. Hopefully it would be a haven some quintant for Lance too. He knew that he couldn’t do it alone.

In that respect, the Wellspring was both a blessing and a threat. When they (inevitably) got wind of Lance’s situation, they pushed hard for Keith to accept enhanced support. He was grateful.

They dispatched a Wellspring minder to take care of light household duties and help with the kids at home. They stocked him up on food and they matched one of the community groups to him so a member would check in on him personally every few quintants. They supported him. On the other hand, the Wellspring could technically take his kids away. His kids were the planet’s kids and they would chase him down even off planet if they found him unfit.

As a rule, the Wellspring kept families intact. People in trouble were aggressively supported so it was rare to get to the point where the Wellspring took the kids but Keith was paranoid. Maybe because deep down he felt like he might be doing harm; maybe his kids deserved better than what he could provide emotionally. He wasn’t sure what he was like compared to other parents but he tried his best.

He tried to stay positive in front of his kids but he was too paranoid on top of stressed on top of grief-stricken on top of despairing for the bad stuff not to leak through. Shiro must’ve sensed it as he was fussier than ever and Clara, his poor daughter, was so much clingier. She had constant stomach aches and always wanted to stay home, not wanting to go to the Wellspring or play with friends.

Her eyes grew wide and worried whenever he left her with a Wellspring caretaker to run errands. It was like she thought she could lose Keith too. It made Keith that much more determined to make it out okay,  no matter what happened to his alpha. He had to _thrive_ for his kids’ sake.

So Keith did things he would never do naturally. He stepped out of his comfort zone and leaned on others for support. Keith avoided bottling up his inner life. He chatted regularly with Voltron friends and was receptive when neighbors reached out to him.

Keith followed Wellspring advice and stuck to routines so Clara would have a sense of stability. He made sure that Lance’s condition wasn’t looming over every aspect of his kids’ lives. He tried to focus on what he could control and keep a positive spin because he wanted Lance and his kids to pick up a sense of good from him.

He figured out that Clara felt better when she felt useful so he encouraged her to make things for him to take to Lance. He told her that surrounding her dad with things from home and family would bring him comfort.

“Princesa, that’s amazing!”

Clara beamed, holding an arm behind herself as she watched Keith admire her latest creation.

“Do you think papi would like it?”

“Are you kidding?” He was truly impressed, he turned the small board over in his hands. She had hammered nails neatly in shape of a heart and strung decorative strings across the nails. “Papi would love this! I’m going to hang it up in his recovery cove.”

She grinned, pleased at his reaction.

“Good job. This will make him happy.” Keith clung to the board as he pulled his daughter in for a hug.

She nodded.

“I’ll be home in time for peacecap, okay?” said Keith, referring to the nightly ritual they adopted from the homeworld in where adults living together would sip “peace” drinks in each other’s company before heading to bed. As a 10 year old, she was extremely proud to peacecap with mami.

She nodded and clung to him as she begged, “Could you please send more pictures of papi?”

“I’ll take a bunch of pictures, princesa.” He glanced at the Wellspring minder, smiling. “But I want you to complete your Wellspring assignments while I’m away. We can look at the pictures together when I get back.”

“You hear that Clara? Mami wants you to work on your Wellspring commitments.” said Leeva cheerfully as she put together a snack for the kids.

Clara’s nose scrunched. Keith could see conniving wheels spinning in his daughter’s eyes. “Be good to Leeva.” He warned. “Don’t cause her any trouble.” She nodded after a beat, amusing Keith with her reluctance. “I’ll be checking your assignments. I don’t want to hear any excuses.”  

“Mami.” She huffed, exasperated.

He pulled back and gave her a stern _don’t-try-to-pull-anything-cause-I’ll-know_ look, watching her grumpiness transform to solemn innocence.

He kissed the top of head, hiding his smile. It was good to see her acting like herself.

“I’ll be back soon.”

She hesitated then smiled, resigned but not upset. “Okay.”  She was getting used to the situation.

Keith left her with the minder so he could say his goodbyes to his baby. He stepped out to the backyard and watched as Shiro sunk into a ball pit next to his friend. The Wellspring had dispatched two minders familiar to the kids, the second caretaker set-up an enclosed soft play area where Shiro and another child being minded were playing.

“Bye Shiro!” Keith called out.

Shiro barely spared him glance, waving dismissively for two ticks as he paid great interest to his friend’s ballpit shoveling. So much for Keith’s parenting ego. He waved at the caretaker and went back inside to board the family transport.

Clara eyed him as the safety canopy engaged. “Bye, mami!”

“Bye, baby.” He murmured as he held her string art with care and waved goodbye. Kept waving once the hull materialized although he knew she couldn’t see him anymore.

The transport pinged for destination.

“Regional Wellspring, Peace sanatorium.” He said as he watched the homecove bay seal shut.

Keith closed his eyes and listened to the familiar whooshing click sounds made by the transport connecting to the air rail buoys. He breathed out as the transport sped towards the familiar destination. He opened his eyes slowly focusing only on the board in his hand, running his fingers carefully over the string art.

The sanatorium was an organic structure made of native cobb, like the spaceports. It had five levels of transport docking stations along the perimeter of the massive trunk-like base. The structure branched out in shape of multi-tiered limbs where individual globe-like coves hung in bunches like grapes on a vine. The coves shined in the sunlight and had varying levels of transparency.

Keith knew which vine and cove was Lance’s, it was one of the cloudy looking globes, far up in the  sparsely populated limbs.

He looked up and spotted it, eyeing it passively as his transport decelerated for dock arrival. He didn’t think at all as the transport docked, just quietly got out and joined the queue for the sanatorium platforms. The crowded platform he boarded dwindled down to him and two other passengers as it reached the critical care coves.

On arrival, Keith bit his lip as he stepped through the sanitizer field and waited for the inner doors to open.

Words materialized in front of him.

_Type one visitor... approved for Blue Cove 8… Welcome Keith… Please follow the blue guides to your destination.._

He took a deep breath and crossed the threshold, entering the vine corridors. He watched blue markers appear on the spiraling hallway and followed them down to Lance’s cove though he already knew the way. Medics and clinical staff greeted him warmly.  He smiled at them as he mentally prepared himself for Lance.

_A bunch of good stuff happened to your family today._

With that, he took a bracing breath and entered Lance’s cove.

The cove inside was like a hollowed out grape where the bottom third had been filled with tinted water. It was a type of liquiform technology contained within the confines of translucent yellow-green walls. If Keith were to look at the neighboring coves, he would see an opaque green since the view was through layers of semi-translucent walls pressed together. The rest of the cove was exposed to an unblocked view of the sky and Wellspring-scape below.

Lance was floating in the center of the liquiform, a medic station beside him. A curved half-wall protruded from the pool not far from Lance’s feet. The wall was partly covered in shelves where Keith and his Voltron friends stuck knick knacks familiar to Lance. The other wall area was overflowing in colorful tapestries, big and small, that were covered in well wishes. They were written in many different languages and were sent by neighbors and people from around the universe.

Boxes of them kept coming. He had stacks of them at home and many more were still at the castleship as there were too many to keep in Lance’s cove.

Still, Keith reserved a spot on the wall for the kids. It was filled with photos of Clara and Shiro and artwork they had made for dad.  

“Hey Lance, I’m back.” He said.

The vine corridor became a ramp at the cove entrance which led into the liquiform pool. Keith waded until his feet no longer touched the ramp floor then treated the liquiform like water and swam towards Lance. The pool’s dryness felt so out of place when it otherwise behaved like liquid. He never expected to experience it again after labor with Shiro.

Lance was immersed in the liquiform in a semi-inclined position. His body, small looking and vulnerable, was sustained by alien technology.

There was a lot of technology.

He was wrapped in translucent fiber netting though most of it was hidden underneath his patient gown. The section around his torso glowed faintly through the fabric as it manipulated local air pressure forcing Lance’s lungs to compress and decompress. The rest of the netting fit snugly, like a second skin over Lance’s extremities.  The pool responded to the artificial cues made by the netting so his body would shift enough to prevent joint and muscle stiffness.

He had a silver disk orbiting his head reminding Keith of the rings that circled some planets. It monitored his brain activity while a nanoparticle feedcuff wrapped around his right upper arm provided sustenance. Any waste Lance produced was taken care off by the liquiform which clouded thickly, trapping, and analyzing the foreign material before disintegrating it.

Beyond all that technology, was the physicality of Lance’s condition. Ugly bruising and discoloration covered his face, a side effect of brain injury. There was more bruising down below, hidden by the garment, that went all the way down to his thighs. The scarring from the deep slash across his face was shining, meaning that staff had re-treated the dermal stitching.

Keith took another deep breath as he reached for Lance’s hand and squeezed. He was warm to the touch. Alive.

“Clara made you something today.”

He gripped his alpha’s fingers and carefully ran them over the string art.

“Those are the nails and that’s the string. Can you feel what it’s shaped like? She made a pink and green heart. Do you feel how perfectly she got the nails? Our daughter’s talented. You’re not gonna stop bragging about her and Shiro when we’re back on Earth, huh?” He smirked. “You were probably torturing everyone at your post about our kids, right?”

Keith placed the artwork on the medic stand nearby and entwined his fingers in Lance’s.

“Wish you stopped telling everyone about our lives. I can’t blame you on this one though. Our kids are fucking amazing.”

He snorted. “What were we doing when we were ten? I think I spent most of it at school drawing dicks on everything.” He grinned squeezing Lance’s hand. “I bet you did too but mine were better.”

Keith glanced at Lance’s face, contemplating the past. “Know what, I don’t believe that. I bet you were a nerd. You got into the Garrison with good grades. My grades were shit up until I met Shiro. Guess his recommendation and my sudden decent grades is what saved my ass. That and my flying skills.” His subtle smile turned sly, “Not that you didn’t have flying skills...just nothing that rivaled mine.

“Got something to say about that?” He smiled mischievously, waiting a beat. “Didn’t think so.”

His alpha lay unresponsive, covered in technology, on the knife’s edge of death.

Keith choked and looked away.

He knew he was living out one of the scenes he had witnessed a few times during the war. He was aware of the sad outcome. Even if Lance survived, what was life going to be like for him?  He did not have medical directives but they had talked about death a few times, he knew Lance’s wishes. Sort of. What would he consider a poor quality of life?

Lance had been floating in place for over two phoebs, unaware of the world. The biologics were allegedly working but along the way they were also injuring him, his face had fresh wounds, evidence of the organisms impact on his brain. Was that painful? How did the medics know for sure that it was not? Was he keeping Lance alive for selfish reasons?

All he knew was that he wouldn’t stop the treatment. He just couldn’t. He couldn’t. Lance can’t die on him now. They had survived so much. They had so much good things going for them. Clara and Shiro needed him. Keith needed him. Lance had to live.

Keith swallowed, he was having a low moment.

He had to focus on the positive.

His eyes landed on the Get Well wall. Look at all the people that cared; thousands of lives touched by his alpha. Thousands of lives rooting for him. Maybe hundreds of thousands.

Keith smiled. He loved going through the tapestry boxes with his kids. He took turns reading them out loud with Clara. Shiro loved grabbing from the boxes and handing his favorite ones to Keith for him read. His favorites were the ones where the well wisher had actually met Lance. For the most part, the stories were absolutely ridiculous, testimony to Lance’s life of hijinks.  

The ones where people met him when he was younger started with “I thought he was annoying but..” While the more recent ones were all about his silliness and his generosity. Those shared stories and well wishes added up. They gave his family a sense of well being.

What else was good? Keith was on the right planet. Their medical technology was as advanced as the alliance med ships, if not more so. The world’s priority was well being and all that resided on the planet were valued. His family was well taken care of. At the sanatorium, the medics treated Lance like he was family. Keith would catch them spending time with his alpha.  He knew they combed his sheared hair and shaved him. Kept him tidy and presentable.

They also gave him reason to hope because they concluded that the biologics were effective. Empathy in this world meant not giving false hope so when they said Lance was improving, he believed it. More observation time was needed for long-term diagnosis. That was a _good_ sign.

What else was good? Keith fished.

Lance’s hand was warm and he had a heartbeat. And on her last visit, Allura sensed growing strength in his quintessence. Lance was in there somewhere and he was fighting.

There was hope.

Keith gestured for the readings which materialized around them. One was of Lance’s brain. It showed little spots as if his brain had freckles. He knew it was the biologics.

Keith held his breath, maybe he was imagining it but the electrical activity in his alpha’s brain stem was brighter than before. Other areas were showing maybe hints of activity?.

There was hope.

He curled into Lance, closing his eyes and whispering, “I love you, Lance. I know you’ll be back when you’re ready. I’ll be here.”

\---

Keith got up early in the morning so he could make breakfast for Clara and Shiro before the minder arrived to take Shiro to the Wellspring. Clara often shared the ride with them or would take the family transport with Keith to a friend’s cove where she would hop onto their transport so they could ride together to the Wellspring.

“Bye, mami!”

“Have fun, princesa.” He waved, happy to see her be herself. Routine was helping his daughter, Clara was willing to engage with her friends again.

Sometimes, after he kissed Clara goodbye, Keith would call a friend on his way to his communal post just to say hey.

“Hey buddy.” Said Hunk cheerfully.

Keith waved, eyeing the lids dancing merrily over top of steaming pots behind his friend. “Hi Hunk. How’s the cooking business?”

Hunk stepped aside, gesturing to the to the ever growing collection of cookware and spices from across the universe.

“Oh it’s only the most amazing thing to ever happen to me? Apart from a magical lion yanking me across the universe, that was a big one. Also fighting a war in my own magical lion, being an amazing leg and having a space niece and space nephew. Those are big. And amazing.”

Keith was grinning. “Sounds like things are going well.”

Hunk gasped dramatically “Now you have jinxed it. Quick change the subject, distract the jinx gods. If they exist. Do they exist? What are you up to? Going to work?”

Keith nodded, “Yeah.” He shared his news, hiding a smile. “So Lance is breathing on his own. He opened his eyes yesterday.”

“Hey!!” Hunk cheered throwing his arms out wide as if to hug.

“Yeah.” Keith smiled fully, “He wasn’t looking at anything, he’s not _there_ there but he’s kind of moving around now.”

“That is so great! Oh man, I can’t wait ‘til my next visit!”

“It’ll be great to see you.”

They chatted until Keith was nearing his post. He wrapped it up at that point so he could ping Lance’s room and wish him a good second sun.  

Once his identity was verified, the system transferred him to a wide shot of Lance’s cove. Instrumental music streamed through the transport speakers. The morning light cast Lance and the pool in sharp relief. He looked ethereal, his body otherworldly as it rested in liquiform that shined brightly in sunlight. His upper body moved as if he were testing out his limbs. It was courtesy of the netting’s periodic stimulation which kept his joints from stiffening.

“Good second sun, Lance.” Keith murmured. His body settled back down. He idly wondered if his alpha was still in there, whole, but maybe in a place unreachable by mortal beings. It was an oddly spiritual thought for Keith. Constantly watching his bondmate made Keith in some ways quieter, more reflective. He spent a lot of time by Lance’s side with nothing but his inner monologue to keep him company.

He thought a lot about the life they shared so far and regretted not appreciating the extraordinary number of good moments for what they were. The coma would inevitably change Lance but it was changing Keith too, fundamentally.  For one, Keith slowed down and appreciated whatever was in front of him. His new pace in life made him more contemplative; more aware of the ever present.

He sought meaning in ordinary things and was willing to entertain spiritual possibilities. Keith had deeper appreciation of Allura and her people’s natural ability to touch a part of existence that was inaccessible to most. He grew more empathetic for others and along the way he found new reserves of personal strength. He found some measure of happiness simply being in Lance’s company.

Keith gave his alpha a heartfelt smile.

Lance’s quintant would be filled with activity starting with staff checking in to evaluate him and take care of his needs. The medics were often handling him, holding his hand and talking to him. They never lost sight of his ‘humanity’ despite his lack of response. He was simply a living, breathing person deserving of respect.

“I’ll see you tonight.”

Keith ended the communication, still smiling.

Sometimes despair weighed heavy in his heart but today he could focus on the good. His alpha’s brain activity was brighter and he was breathing on his own. Even squirming around all by himself, showing signs of life. Those slivers of ‘alive’ gave Keith so much hope.

Keith would bring Clara tonight. He didn’t bring her too often as he didn’t want her whole world revolving around her dad’s situation but she had asked.

The transport arrived at his post. Time for post duty.

\---

Keith got up early in the morning so he could make breakfast for Clara and Shiro before the minder arrived to take Shiro to the Wellspring. Clara often shared the ride with them or would take the family transport with Keith to a friend’s cove where she would hop onto their transport so they could ride together to the Wellspring.

“Bye, mami!”

“Don’t forget your lunch.” He handed her the container she left on the counter and gave her a kiss goodbye.

Sometimes, Keith would call a friend on his way to his communal post just to say hey. He was far from tight knit with Lotor but he was compelled to continue his alpha’s tradition of reaching out to one of the central leaders of the free universe for complete nonsense. It wasn’t easy to get a hold of him without raising false alarms but he managed it.

“Allura will be back shortly from council.” Said Lotor.

“That’s great but I wanted to talk to you.”

“Ah.” He neither encouraged or discouraged Keith to continue, just sat back at his desk and studied him.

Keith glanced at Axca who was behind Lotor, staring. He could never entirely figure her out. They were maybe friends, better than he and Lotor anyway. Sometimes she pinged him for advise on some matter or another but not without prolonged awkward staring.

“I wanted to talk to you privately.”

Lotor’s stare was unwavering as Axca stuck an arm up and said, “Gone.” And made her way out.

“Are you alone?”

“Yes, what is the purpose of your call?”

“I was wondering if I could borrow five gacs?” Keith said with relish. Lance would be proud of him.

There was a heavy silence as Lotor sat back and scrutinized him. He watched his face go through several subtle emotions before settling on confusion.

“You contacted me because you want to borrow five gacs.” said Lotor in disbelief.

“Uh huh.”

The corner of Lotor’s lips began to notch upwards by the tiniest of margins. Keith had the sense that Lotor was fighting the urge to roll his eyes.

“You and your bonded are perfectly fit for each other.”

“Thanks, I feel the same about you and Allura.”

Lotor waited patiently for the stupid reason which Keith was more than happy to supply. “Your royal accents fit well together.”

“Of course.” He drawled, nonplussed. “How does your family fare?”

Keith smiled. “We’re doing well. Lance is improving. He’s got wake-sleep cycles now.”

“That is gratifying news, I will advise Allura.  We will visit again soon.”

“Thanks.”

Lotor raised his eyebrows. “If there isn’t anything else..?” He was ready to move on with his quintant.

“There isn’t...” Keith hesitated, “Well. Actually I got something.”

“Oh?”

“When Lance got back, that first movement… you were with Clara a lot. You helped her frame what happened to Lance. You made her feel safe and you gave her something stable to rely on when I was in no state of mind…you know.. ” He paused and said earnestly, “Thank you”

Lotor’s subtle smirk grew sharper. “Do I look like a man in need of thanks? Send my greetings to Clara. ”

Keith smiled wryly, “Bye, Lotor.”

“Goodbye Keith.”

He would ping Lance’s room next to wish him a good second sun.  Then it would be time for post duty.

\---

Keith got up early in the morning so he could make breakfast for Clara and Shiro before the minder arrived to take Shiro to the Wellspring. Clara often shared the ride with them or would take the family transport with Keith to a friend’s cove where she would hop onto their transport so they could ride together to the Wellspring.

Today she leaned oh-so-casually on the counter, the way she did when she wanted to ask for something she knew he wouldn’t go for, and tried to act natural. Lance would do the whole casual thing back in the day. He smiled to himself, pretending he didn’t notice while he kept his eyes on Shiro who kept catapulting his spoon from his high chair.

Clara edged her way around the counter and started running the dirty cookware through the sanitizer. Interesting.

“Mami” She called out, offhandedly, ”Can I stay at Ophi’s cove this restive?”

Keith raised an eyebrow as he looked back at her, “Isn’t Ophi Minneliann?“

Shiro exploded into laughter as Keith casually caught the spoon sailing over his head, mid-flight and placed it back in his little hand. “Eat a little bit more, Shiro.” He said as Clara hurriedly joined them at the table.

“They invited me.” She wheedled, ”They are building an orbital tractor this restive! Can I go? I’ve done all my chores! Please, please, please?”

“Clara…” He paused to grin encouragingly at Shiro, opening his mouth wide as Shiro did the same, sticking the spoonful in his mouth.  He glanced at Clara again and offered, “You could stay over for the quintant and take our transport back in the evening.”

She wasn’t happy. Clara responded in her version of Keith’s ‘reasonable mom’ voice, “That’s not fair. You know Ophi’s bearers. They let them stay here, why shouldn’t I stay over there?”

“Princesa, you’re human and Galra. Minnelianns can adapt fine to us but it doesn’t work that way the other way around.”

“Why?” She challenged and followed him when he picked up Shiro and headed for his cove to get him dressed for Wellspring.

Keith tried to reason with her, “I know Minnelianns and I met Ophi’s bearers, they’re great. But princesa, their way of life is extremely uncomfortable to humans.”

“I’m half Galra.”

“You’re a quarter Galra but you’re full human expression.” He placed Shiro on his old changing table for a moment and started ticking off, on his fingers, reasons for Clara not to go, “You wouldn’t like it. One, they- Shiro!! Agh.” Shiro rolled himself off the table, landed on his face on the floor, scrambled up and ran for his toy pit.

“ _One-_ ” Keith yelped from the toypit after chasing his son. He called out, “They keep their homes iced down at night, more so in winter. Two, they have three sleep cycles and at home they stand in suspended animation so their eyes and vents are open as their bodies let out a really bad scent...”

Keith got back to Clara with Shiro squirming in his arms who was whining,“Mami, down! Down!”

He wrestled Shiro into a heat skin then let him down but hung on as he stuffed his son into a heavy coat and winter hat. “Threeee..” Keith puffed, “All their food is sand-like and they take great offense if you don’t eat what is offered. And worst of all four…”

Shiro toppled over and couldn’t get up. They watched Shiro attempt to roll side to side for momentum.

“Four. They have a respectful intonation for the outside world and a casual intonation for home. I got a sample of it when I paid Ophi’s bearers a visit. Their home intonation sounds a lot like a bunch of knives being sharpened on glass.”

She turned to glared at him stubbornly, “I _love_ that sound.”

Keith stared at his daughter. She was usually so sweet but when she got something in her head she had a hard time letting go. He wasn’t sure he could take a movement’s worth of her bad mood and whining if he said ‘no’. What were the consequences of letting her go? If he were to let her go the only part that could actually be dangerous was the cold which he could take care of by making her wear a heat skin.

“You say that now.” He responded. He rescued Shiro by pulling him up by his armpits then offered him his hand and hurried towards the transport bay.

“Mami!” Clara whined, following him out.

Keith sighed. What would Lance do? He imagined him shrugging and smiling mischievously. _Let her do it. It’s hard to learn what you don’t experience._ Maybe it’ll help her figure out that it’s good to listen sometimes.

He grabbed a shawl from a storage hutch by the transport bay and swung it over Clara’s shoulders, eyeing her unhappy frown as he helped her with the hooks of the winter garment.

“You wouldn’t have a good time.” He tried.

“Yes, I would.” She grumped. “I did all my assignments, finished my chores and laughed at your jokes. Mami, _please_.”

Keith snorted, highly amused. That explains why his daughter had been giggling at every commentary of his all movement.

 _That’s your child not mine_ , said the Lance voice in his head.

Keith tried to hide is smile but Clara had already caught on to his mood, smiling hopefully.  

“If you stay at Ophi’s cove you have to wear your heat skin, the heavier one, the whole time.”

She nodded, excitedly, “I can do that!!”

“And” He warned as he picked off some lint from her shawl, “You’re going to have to live with your decision. Mami is not gonna rescue you.”

She didn’t look the least bit worried. “That’s fine!” She rubbed her hands together, speeding away to the kitchen to grab her lunch. “A whole restive with Minneliann tractor pieces!!” She whooped.

Keith shook his head, smirking. His daughter had to learn things the hard way. It must be genetic.

The family transport silently rotated out of the bay as one of the Wellspring transports arrived with a licensed minder.

Time for his kids to go.

\---

Keith got up early in the morning so he could make breakfast for Clara and Shiro before the minder arrived to take Shiro to the Wellspring. Clara often shared the ride with them or would take the family transport with Keith to a friend’s cove where she would hop onto their transport so they could ride together to the Wellspring.

“Bye, mami!”

“Have fun, princesa.” He gave her a kiss goodbye then waved at her and her friend before the transport undocked from her friend’s transport bay.

Sometimes, after he kissed Clara goodbye, Keith would call a friend on his way to his communal post just to say hey. Today he didn’t feel like talking to anyone other than Lance so he pinged his room.

Once his identity was verified, the system transferred him to a wide shot of Lance’s cove. No music was playing today. The morning light cast Lance and the pool in sharp relief. He still looked ethereal, his body otherworldly as it rested in liquiform that shined brightly in sunlight.

“Good second sun, Lance.” Keith murmured, looking down at a cup of nut milk he was nursing. He smiled to himself.

“I can’t wait to see you tonight. I have to tell you about your daughter. She spent an entire restive in a Minneliann homecove…”

He took a sip closing his eyes. “And Lotor. Remember how I called him a few movements ago?” He smirked, “He sent this elaborate gift box. Fancy ribbons, silky fabric… it had five gacs inside.”

Keith grinned as he looked up and _locked eyes_ with Lance.

The cup slipped out of his hands unnoticed as he stared at his alpha who was staring _back_.  

“Lance?” He whispered.

No response other than his steadfast gaze.

“Lance?” Keith asked again, desperately. He sat on the edge of his seat, senselessly touching the screen as if he could reach through and touch his alpha.

No response. His heart was racing as he leaned far left. Lance’s eyes followed his movement.

“Transport, redirect to the Wellspring Sector, Peace sanatorium.”

The transport recalculated directions and swiftly rerouted for the Wellspring.

\---

Keith got up early in the morning so he could make breakfast for Clara and Shiro before the minder arrived to take Shiro to the Wellspring. Clara often shared the ride with them or would take the family transport with Keith to a friend’s cove where she would hop onto their transport so they could ride together to the Wellspring.

He was quietly relieved that this time she went with Shiro and the minder. He smiled kissing his kids goodbye and waved at the caretaker, careful not to drop the pretense until they were out of sight. The moment they were gone, he grabbed one of Shiro’s toys and sent it flying across the coveroom.  Other things followed as he snatched other things scattered across the floor - one of Shiro’s shoes, a few pieces from one of Clara’s engineering sets, his own shoes.

Shiro had spent the whole morning crying and only settled down when a minder, his favorite one, arrived.

Clara had been talking spaceship parts yet again. He didn’t give a shit about spaceship parts.

Keith crossed his arms and glared at the floor. Sometimes Keith he felt like it was all a charade.

He stormed into the family transport and barked, “My communal post. Go.”

All that mystical quintessence spiritual nonsense he had been thinking about for many movements. He snorted. Living with Lance in a coma wasn’t a spiritual experience, it was more like a horrible living nightmare he couldn’t escape from. He had kids, loud demanding kids he had to take care of - _alone_. Him as a parent without Lance was not part of the plan. That was not what he had signed up for.

He was sick of going through the same thing over and over with just slightly different flavors, trying to make it through the stress. Constantly trying to be positive while Lance floated in liquiform, perfectly oblivious. What was he doing? Really. How was he supposed to keep sane when his kids were relentless with their childish things at home? Non-stop talking, yelling, or whining or crying. Clara would avoid doing her assignments then cry or whine when things were taken away.

She always had an excuse and often she would turn things on Keith, complaining how he never wanted to do anything with her. All while Keith tried to keep Shiro from offing himself. Then at his post, he had to push personal concerns away and complete his duties diligently or his assigned sector may be under-resourced for the next quarter and people would suffer. Regardless of the demands on him, Keith visited Lance and chatted away as if everything was great. He talked as Lance’s empty shell moved around awkwardly like a puppet on strings. What kind of life was this?

The biologics were supposedly working but six phoebs had gone by with no real improvement. Why was he going to the sanatorium every single quintant? Lance wouldn’t notice anything. The eyes following him that one time were a fluke. Two movements had gone by and Lance hadn’t looked at him again. His alpha moved away from pain or made prolonged groaning noises sometimes but did nothing else. What was the point?

Keith wiped at the tears clouding his vision. He was drained. A heavy sense of guilt made his body slump against the wall of the transport.

How could he think like this? What was he doing? He sniffed.

Shiro and the Wellspring had told him he was taking on too much going every single quintant. They were right. He could do routine fine but there was too much in his routine.  He was never able to rest at home, sacraficed his kids to pay vigil to Lance. It was just exhausting, constantly watching him and quietly hoping to no avail.

Keith took a deep breath.

He pinged Lance’s room.

There he was, serenely floating in liquiform. Keith bit his lip. Seeing him always stirred that breathless soft something inside. His alpha.

Keith held on to that.

“Good second sun, Lance.” He said, lips trembling, “Sorry, I can’t make it today.”  

\---

During restive, when Keith wasn’t threatening Clara with a sleepover at Ophi’s, he would let her hang out with her friends or sometimes he managed to take the family out on outings. Often, it was to visit an elder. They would spend time gardening or cleaning up or listening to stories. But then there was this one special elder.

Her name was Aileeyt. Aileeyt the former peace enforcer.

She was his favorite. She would always schedule a Wellspring minder when he visited, then sweetly separate him from Shiro, handing his toddler off to the minder. Then, she would ask for a stroll with him and Clara, which always led to the combat arts ground. Once there she would ask them if they knew how old she was which was Clara’s cue to gleefully scramble away towards the spectator shield.

His daughter would giggle and start recording on her comm because inevitably, regardless of Keith’s answer (“I don’t know.” or “I don’t care.” or “You’re twelve.” or “You’re as old as time.” or “Two thousand decaphoebs too old.”), Aileeyt would shout, “I AM TWO THOUSAND DECAPHOEBS! I have over two millennia of sword fighting experience - spar with me, baa-sheep!”

And she would toss him a weapon as he laughed heartily. He loved her before he even knew her because she used to be assigned to Lance and Lance had told him all about her and all about her interest in learning human insults. His alpha also relayed his own dedication to teaching her the very worst ones - baa-sheep, quack-duck, cluck-chicken, and worst of all - Kaltenecker-cow.

Keith would have to put himself together quick because Aileeyt was formidable and she could knock him on his ass. He went all out sparring with her, forgetting the laughter under the barrage of aggressive cutting moves. His adrenaline would pump as he deflected her attacks and took advantage of any openings; there were rarely any at all.  His daughter thrilled in watching him be sort of ‘cool’ (because somehow, when Clara was with her friends, Keith became the most embarrassing being to walk the planet??).

Aileeyt would put him through the wringer which let him work through the tension he had built up during the movement.

Keith yelled, “You’re open!” This time he had brought along his heirloom knife. It transformed to a full sword blade as he swung down hard, impressed at how she deflected his attack. She had almost let her guard down once she had knocked the practice sword from his grip.

She laughed, “Well, look at you! Let me see that.” She beckoned for him to throw her his weapon which he did, smiling. She inspected it carefully, “This is Galra. Made of luxite.” There was respect in her tone or maybe it was pride as she said, “I forget that you were once a blade. “ She tossed his knife back. “Such giants among us.” She then smirked, “But not giant enough - come at me, cluck-chicken!!”

Former Blade of Marmora member or not, there was no way he was ever going to win with that kind of psychological warfare happening.

\---

Three quintants later, he received an early call from the sanatorium.

“Good first sun, Keith.” Greeted the medic, smiling kindly at him.

“Hi.” He said, rubbing at his eyes as rolled over in his bed swing and set the comm on his pillow. He had slept in during restive since he was planning to spend the whole quintant visiting Lance with his kids.

“Forgive the early call. I wish to update you on your bonded.”

He straightened, looking at her worriedly, “What is it?”

“Today Lance will cross a definitive milestone. Medspring has assimilated the biologics behavior and impact of that behavior on Lance’s physiology.” She was referring to the medical operating system used on the planet.  “We have certified reliability - our system has rightly predicted shifts in his brain activity.” She smiled, “Our readings predict wakefulness. Today.”

He froze, she was smiling but politely so. Keith was careful not to get his hopes up, ”That is good news, right?”

She nodded once. “It is excellent news. However, I must warn you of the adverse effects.”

His heart began to race as he sat up. He tried to listen over his inner monologue yelling, _Lance is waking up today!!!._

“When he awakens he will experience great agitation. You must prepare for uncharacteristic verbal and physical aggression. This is a normal phase for the type of injury he endured. Our provisional readings predict this stage to be short-lived however he must enter the phase for increased readings certainty.”

“Okay.”

“Keith, be aware that the pool will be programmed to restrain his movements as we must take care that he does not hurt himself or others. This may be upsetting to witness. We advise you not to bring your children until he has progressed beyond this stage.“

“Okay, I’ll make arrangements.” He was smiling hard.

She grinned at last. “Good tidings, Keith.”

“Good tidings.”

\---

Keith could not make it to the sanatorium fast enough. He overrode the standard speeds of the transport, tapping his leg impatiently as he was zipped through the region. Then the navigator platforms were too slow as they slid silently from area to area inside the sanatorium, Keith leapt out as soon as it locked onto the higher vines and ran the rest of the way for the correct cluster of coves.

When he arrived, he found a medic manning the medical post, she had several images of Lance’s brain hovering around her. She greeted him with a smile, “Look who’s here, Lance!”

“Hi, Inalat.” Keith waded to Lance’s side, anxious to see him. His alpha didn’t look any different. The bruising had faded a while back so his face mostly looked like himself before the injury. Most of his hair was back except for the scarred areas which remained bare and raw looking though healed. His body overall was softer looking from loss of muscle tone. Keith wasn’t sure what exactly he was expecting to see. The only difference was in the liquiform itself which was a coppery color instead of its usual lilac.

When would Lance wake up?

His eyes were shut but even if he opened them it didn’t necessarily mean much since sometimes he would open them reflexively. Keith bit his lip and tried to reason that it could be at any time today. He would wake up and look back at him and at least recognize him. Or it’s possible the tech could be wrong all together and miscalculated. He had to prepare himself for anything.

Keith smiled; a greeting for Lance was on his lips as he reached for his hand. The moment his fingers touched, Lance startled, yanking his hand away. His eyes flew open, wide with panic as he looked at Keith who looked back, shocked.

“No!”

“You’re safe Lance.” soothed the medic as he sat up, head swivelling wildly in her direction. The readings showed a sharp spike in heart rate.

His gaze swung from spot to spot then focused on the pool he was in as he tried to scramble away. The liquiform kept his movements muted.

He managed a mangled shout of, “Get away!’

A long chain of loud incomprehensible garble followed as he tried to shake himself free.

He then cried out. “Let me go!”

“Lance! It’s okay!” Keith tried to process the fact that Lance was in motion and shouting. His alpha was all primitive instincts, stripped of higher thought as he snarled like a cornered animal trying to escape with its life.

“Freefall..” He said, followed by more incomprehensible shouting. “ _You_.” His eyes landed on Keith,“Fucking traitor!” Lance spat. “Let me go!!” He screeched. “Let me go!!”

Keith wasn’t sure what to do other than try to reassure him. The medic seemed unperturbed. He watched as Lance tried to free himself then stilled, disoriented and quiet.

“Lance..” Keith said, quietly.

His bondmate looked up at him again and scowled.

“Fucking traitor!” He shouted, “With you Black! Black! BLACK!” He struggled against the his restraints, “BLACK!” He thundered at Keith.

Keith squeezed his eyes shut for a moment and tried not take things personally.

\---

It took a few movements to fully move beyond that stage. The little time Lance was conscious he would spend shouting at anyone in sight. Keith called him every single quintant and visited every other quintant. He would always wish him a second sun and would watch quietly as Lance hurled insults at him.

\---

The medics removed the orbiting disk monitoring him.

They stepped up his rehabilitation therapy once his aggression petered out. Lance always seemed to be in great pain despite the Wellspring’s best efforts. He moaned a lot and grimaced which was one of the very few expressions he retained. The open-humor and good-natured set to his face was replaced by emptiness.  He was a human shell when he fixed his gaze on Keith but he was on the mend.

Lance was on the mend.

Keith made that thought his mantra as he squeezed Lance’s hand.

He smiled as he asked, patiently. “Do you remember your name?”

There was a long delay in his responses. Everything took longer to process now.

“Lance.” He whispered.

“Yeah! Do you remember what happened to you?”

“Uh... ...injured? Injured at mission.”

Keith nodded, “Yes, do you remember my name?” Lance’s gaze drifted. “Lance-” Keith waited for his attention again before he repeated, “Do you remember my name?”

“It’s Keith.”

“Yeah!” Keith leaned in, pressing the bridge of his nose on the underside of his alpha’s jaw and breathing in deeply. “Do you remember what you used to call me?”

“I call you Keith?”

“Close. Do you remember your daughter’s name?

“Clara.”

“Yup, do you remember your son’s name?”

“Uh..Black.”

Keith smiled to himself. “Nope.” He leaned back and grinned fondly at his bondmate. “Do you want to try again? What’s your son’s name?”

“Ah..” Lance said softly. He then asked tentatively, “Was it Sheryce?”

Keith laughed and kissed him. “Close. It’s Shiro!”

“Shiro.”

“Yeah.”

\---

The demands on Keith were not easy. Raising his kids and being the main caretaker for his alpha meant constant work.

Even when Lance returned home,  life was no less hectic - there was a constant back and forth to Wellspring and a never ending flow of people in his home, visiting or providing assorted rehabilitation therapy. Lance was in a great deal of pain and was wheelchair mobile for the most part.

Sometimes, after soothing Shiro, who hated Lance on sight and had trouble with him being back home, and after defusing Lance’s frustration before a meltdown could happen, deep down Keith would wonder if maybe he could just escape or maybe Lance could quietly pass away and that would be that. But anytime Lance had some kind of set back - often a bad reaction to the biologics maintenance sessions - Keith would lie awake, desperately begging the universe for Lance to turn out okay.

The same things that made him want to give it all up were the same things that made life matter to him. His children, his love for his alpha. Keith got up and got his kids ready and did all the things he didn’t actually feel like doing because he loved them. He took on being the main caretaker for Lance - a heavy uncompensated burden - because he loved his alpha.

So Keith would keep pushing. He kept sane with help from therapy and friends’ support. He dealt with Lance’s newfound incontinence, his alpha rarely aware when he had an accident.

He always, always had peacecap with his daughter even if it meant waking her and sitting by her bedside with smoking cups of ‘peace’ drinks.

“Princesa.” He whispered one night. This time he remembered to knock. She asked this of him now.

“It’s open!” Clara piped up. Keith slipped inside the cove as his daughter sat up in her bed swing, smiling sleepily as she scootched to the edge of the bed and reached for the cup he offered her.

“Did you enjoy your lunch today?” Keith asked.

Clara made a face. “No, yeughh, it was gross! I swapped it with Xiotti’s.”

“Thanks a lot.”

Clara grinned as she rubbed her bangs out of her face. “Could I just eat the Wellspring food?”

“Try to eat a bite or two of your bag lunch. The Wellspring meals can’t sustain humans very well.”

“Then can the caretakers always make my lunch?”

Keith tried to hide his amusement, “But I want to make you lunch?”

“Mami… maybe you could put Hunk’s lunches in my bag?? It’s like you made me lunch!”

Keith laughed. “Uh huh.”

She smiled and set her cup on the nightstand, laying back in her bed swing and curling up.

“Do you think papi will get better?” She wondered.

Keith nodded. “He’s going to try his best.”

“I miss him.” She sighed.

He tucked the sheets tight around her and said. “Me too. He might not be the papi you knew but we’re all going to work hard to help him reach his full potential. We’ll figure it out together - me, you, Shiro and papi.”

She snorted as she closed her eyes. “Not Shiro, he got his butt stuck in the snack jar.”

“Clara.” Keith admonished. “He’s not even two.”

“Did I get my butt stuck in a snack jar when I was one?”

“Yes.” He lied.

She snuck a peek at him, highly suspicious.

He laughed and gave her a kiss. “Good night, princesa.”

“Good night.” She was already falling back to sleep.

Keith picked up the cups and headed back out to the kitchen where he dawdled at the sanitizer. He wanted to sleep but he was not exactly ready to deal with his bedcove. Lance would be there in their bed swing. It was like sharing the bed with a stranger that stole Lance’s scent. He wouldn’t talk to him unless prompted and when he responded it was in that new monotone of his.

It was an acutely lonely and confusing situation.

His _scent_ was right. It made Keith want to curl up to Lance’s side. In the morning, he would be so aroused that he would hurry to the bathroom to get himself off in the shower which took barely a touch or two. But Lance showed no more than passing interest in him and it was far from sexual. Keith never expected this situation with his alpha.

Before Lance got back, the few times Keith managed not to crawl into bed and fall asleep dead away, he would fantasize about Lance and how they would would pick back up on their sex life. He thought maybe his return would kickstart his heat since he still had not had one. The closest he had was pre-heat symptoms but actual heat never manifested. Instead, he was sharing a bed with a disinterested alpha who might balk at his heat.

It was awkward. At least for him. Lance went straight to their bedcove for sleep that first night. When Keith asked if he wanted to share the bed, Lance simply nodded.

Keith sighed and forced himself to head to bed. He reminded himself that Lance was still there in some form, he just needed a little help.

He found Lance sitting in his wheelchair, scrolling through a tablet.

He smiled, “Hey Lance.” His alpha did not reply as Keith sank to his knees next to him and peeked at the tablet. He grinned, feeling heartened. Lance had found the text messages Clara had written him.

“Clara wrote these for you! This one is in Spanish - Papi, quisiera decirte-” Lance snatched the tablet away in annoyance, “I can read, Keith.” He said.

Keith tried not to punch him. He breathed and made a note to himself to call the therapist to figure out how to handle Lance’s behavior. “Okay.” He let his temper cool off as he watched him rapidly scroll through the texts. “Would you read one to me?”

Lance stopped scrolling. He seemed to struggle with choosing one, his finger hovering between text messages for so long that Keith thought maybe he had forgotten.

“Papi..” Lance read out loud, he paused. “That’s me.”

Keith squeezed his arm, smiling up at him. “Yeah.”

“Papi..” He struggled to read the words. “I miss..you..so much..today Sheryce..and I -”

“Shiro.” Keith corrected.

“Black and I..”

“Shiro.” Keith corrected again.

“Shiro and I.. had.. sweet.. sweetened..crystals.. theywereso.. Good.. I ..hope ..you ..can ..havethem ..where ..you ..are ..loveclara.” He seemed to be considering the text. “No crystals. I had..ah. I had cream straws.”

Keith felt his heart jolt. What was he talking about?

“When did you have cream straws?” He asked very carefully.

Lance glanced at him as he tinkered with the tablet.“Before pain.”   
  
Keith bit his lip. Was that during his mission? He desperately wanted to know more about Lance’s experience but what scared him was that called it a time before pain. His expression was generally flat, maybe he was always hurting and Keith didn’t know.

“Are you in pain right now?” He asked, searching his face, afraid of the answer.

Lance seemed to consider his words as he said softly, “No.”

Keith sagged in relief and kissed his alpha’s hand. He wasn’t sure how he could live with himself if Lance was enduring pain all the time. He knew from the medics that the biologics effects were sometimes excruciating to Lance. Keith rested his cheek on Lance’s arm and looked back down at the tablet.

He realized Lance was deleting the texts.

“Lance! No.” He said, anguished. He grabbed his hand, stopping him. If Lance was fully cognizant, he would treasure those texts forever. He took a steadying breath, “You don’t have to delete them.”

“Oh.”

\---

Movements went by. Lance wasn’t who he used to be. He grew frustrated at home and in his therapies and lashed out. He seemed to have little control of his emotions overall. Sometimes he would backslide but on the whole he was getting better. Lance seemed interested in interacting with his kids and would try to speak to them at length. He was anxious to go back to his communal post and thought he was ready despite clear reasons why he was not.

But a whole new problem Keith was not equipped for, arose. Lance was doing inappropriate things that were sexual in nature. He was hitting on his caretakers and reached out to grope passerbys if they were out on a walk. He would try to corner Keith sometimes and would piss him off with the things he said in trying to get him to have sex. Keith would sleep in the guestcove if Lance tried anything because he wasn’t about to give it up for him if he was being a coercive evil fuck.

He’d rather die.

Things came to head in the family kitchen one quintant when Keith heard Clara ask curiously, “What are you doing, papi?”

Keith turned around in time to catch Lance’s eyes fixed on him. He had been watching him reheat his dinner (as he had arrived late for family meal. The minder had just left.). Keith saw his arm working and frowned, confused for a moment until he realized that Lance was masturbating underneath the kitchen table in the presence of their children.

All at once Keith felt his body shift as rage boiled through his veins. In an instant, he was snatching Lance’s arm and digging his fingers in enough to bruise and possibly break.

“ _No_.” He hissed.

How _dare_ he!

“Ow! Let go!” Lance yelped.

If it was anyone else, Keith would’ve greeted them with fists and kept beating until there was nothing left to break. The one and only real line he had about anything at all was his kids and Lance just crossed it.

He refused to let go of his grip despite Lance crying out in pain. He was trying to twist away. Shiro had started crying.

“Clara.” Keith said very calmly as he kept his steadfast glare on Lance. “Do me a favor and take Shiro to his cove. Stay there with him and keep the door locked until I say otherwise.”

“Okay.” He heard his daughter say nervously. He heard her moving around, hushing Shiro as she followed Keith’s instructions and shut the cove door behind herself.

The moment the door clicked, Keith leaned into Lance’s space and snarled, “If you _ever_ do that again in front of our kids I will make sure there is nothing left for you to grab. Do you understand?”

“You are hurting me, let go!” shouted Lance.

“ _Do you fucking understand?_ ”

“Yes! Yes! Let go!”

Keith eyed him, he couldn’t stand the look of his alpha at the moment. He marched away to their bedcove as Lance shouted behind him, “Keith!”

He locked the door before Lance could wheel close enough to stop him.

“Keith!” He continued to shout.

Keith crossed his arms and squeezed his eyes shut, refusing to answer him. He didn’t know what to do next.

Lance kept shouting his name and working the doorknob until he tired out. Eventually, he grew silent and presumably wheeled away. By that point, Keith had decided to call Lance’s sanatorium team, unsure exactly what he planned to do once he called.

One of his medics was available and answered, smiling warmly.

“Good tidings, Keith. What troubles you?”

“I don’t know if I can deal with Lance.” He said bluntly.

She nodded in non-judgemental concern. “What has triggered your distress?”

Now that the initial anger was over he began to feel an overwhelming sadness and grief.. He felt sick even saying it, and grew angry again as he spat out “He was pleasuring himself in front of our kids.”

“What is the nature of ‘pleasuring himself’?” What the fuck. Keith tried not to be impatient. He was the alien in this world after all.

“Touching his reproductive parts for sexual pleasure.  Masturbating.”

“Ah!” Her eyes moved off screen. He knew she must’ve been pulling information from the databanks. “Allow me light insight of your cultural context…” She said as she read, “Mmm it appears that Lance has violated the social norms of human and Galra modern societies.” She gave him a sympathetic look, “This behavior is understandably of great distress to you.”

He would wonder later what was normal in this world since she had to look up why he was upset. He’d never seen anything surprising. At the moment he was too wrapped up in his own anguish to notice.

“I should’ve known this would happen.”

“You could not have predicted Lance’s actions. No one is at fault.”

“How could he do this?”

The medic soothed, “Keith, I assure you his injury is the root cause for his actions. Ah..” She struggled for the word, “Common sense is inaccessible to your bonded. He will exhibit poor judgement and will need time to relearn and recognize the boundaries of your shared social mores.”

“What do I do?”

“Firmly assert expectations. Try not to be upset and redirect him. Reinforce parameters.”

Keith swallowed. “Thanks.’ He said as he disconnected. He was too disturbed to remember niceties.

He forced himself to head back out and found his alpha back at the kitchen table holding a dishrag and wiping one spot. It looked like he had been at it a while. Lance watched him walk towards him.

“Hi.” He said.

Keith replied, “That was inappropriate behavior.”

“Huhm?” Lance’s eyes were red rimmed.

“What you did earlier.”

He could see Lance churning over his words before he offered another delayed, “Huhm?”

“What you did earlier.”

“What did I do?” He asked after he thought about it, he continued, “You left me alone.” Lance scowled, hands curling into fists. “Keith.”

“You had your hand around your dick rubbing off in front of Clara and Shiro.” Keith replied angrily.

He knew Lance was on the edge but he was on the edge himself and could not hold back. He had to push the point home. “That was not appropriate. You can never do that again in front of our kids.” In case it wasn’t clear.

Lance stared at him, agitated. Something inside him seemed to snap, “You’re fucking the neighbors.” He said, eyes clouding in anger.

“What??”

He swiped his arm over the table, knocking down his dish and empty cup. “You’re fucking the neighbors!” Keith recognized this as a full blown tantrum, “You want to fuck them!” He was screaming it at the top of his lungs within earshot of their kids. Keith wanted to die.

“Lance.”

“You’re fucking them! Dirty fucking whore. Fucking whore! Fucking whore!”

“I know you’re upset. It’s okay to be upset.” Keith said tersely, ready to knock Lance off his chair and leave him there.

The last straw was when Lance slammed his fist down on the table.

It took everything Keith had to stand up and calmly walk away. Lance had to learn that losing his temper like that would get him no attention from Keith.

He overrode the lock to Shiro’s door and entered. There was very loud children music coming from further back in the cove. He found his kids tucked away in Shiro’s toy pit. Clara was playing with Shiro.

Keith sat down cross-legged next to her as she silently flung herself in his arms, face turned away from Shiro, crying. He held her, letting her cry it out and took a few calming breaths before he smiled at Shiro, “Is that a blue poppacoo?”

Shiro nodded, “It’s my blue puhcoo!” He squeezed the toy and released it so it would float in place above him.

“Can you make purple poppacoo? How do you make purple poppacoo??”

Shiro grinned as he got down on his knees, looking for the toy. In the meanwhile, Keith rubbed Clara’s back and kissed her head whispering, “It’s okay.”

Shiro ran up to him with a red version of the toy.

“That’s not purple poppacoo??”

Shiro cackled, dropping down on his butt. “Mami, reh puhcoo! Reh puhcoo and blue puhcoo put-, ” He breathed and said said some gibberish then, “Purpo! Purpo-pacoo!!”

Keith grinned as Shiro tossed the red toy up. It quickly joined Blue’s orbit then merged together making a bigger purple toy.

Keith gasped, “What’s that one??”

“Purpo puhcoo!”

“Good job!”  Clara was wiping at her eyes and had turned to watch. “The purple one sparkles if you shake it..” She said quietly.

“Can you shake it Shiro?”

Shiro grabbed it, pulling until it seperated back to red and blue and shook them vigorously, “Oooh sparkles!!”

He heard Clara snort and smiled in amusement because the separate toys didn’t actually sparkle. He watched her sit up and help Shiro figure out the kinds of stuff the various stuffed toys could do. Keith found himself calming down. His kids weren’t suddenly acting any differently.

His alpha didn’t know what he was doing. Lance had come back from death and was trying his best to integrate back with the family. He had to relearn everything. Keith took another bracing breath. He had to cut him some slack. Keith gave Clara a squeeze on her shoulder to get her attention. “I’ll be back, princesa. Everything is gonna be okay. I promise.”

Her eyes grew damp again but she nodded.

He grabbed his son, “I’ll be right back Shiro!” He smothered hims with kisses before letting go and heading back out.

Back to Lance.

He returned to the kitchen, wary of what he would encounter. Lance looked at him dully; it took a moment for him to say, “Hi.”

Keith studied the strangely humorless expression. It was Lance’s default now. He felt like crying for some reason. Instead, Keith smiled, “Hi. Remember me?”

“Keith.”

He pretended Lance had grinned mischievously and smirked. “Yeah. Do you remember what you used to call me?”

“Keith?”

Keith sat down, smiling softly at his alpha. “Close.”

“Huhm?”

“You were close.”

“Mm…” He had a tablet in his hand. The screen orientation was locked and he had it upside down. Keith righted it for him.

“Thank you ...My head hurts.”

Keith frowned, “I’ll get you something for that.” He hesitated. “Would you like to get ready for bed?”

“Huhm?”

When it looked like Lance was getting distracted, Keith took his alpha’s hand and squeezed. “Do you want to get ready for bed? Brush your teeth?”

“Yeah. That would be nice.”

“Okay.” Keith began to wheel Lance to their cove. He caught Clara hanging out by Shiro’s door, looking at them tentatively. She glanced at him and he nodded encouragingly,

“Good rest, papi. I love you.” She said.

“Love you..” He replied mechanically.

She beamed at him before giving him a big hug. They watched her run back into the cove.

Keith took Lance to their bedcove. He guided him, slow and methodical through the bits of night routine that he could handle. Lance was now able to follow a sequence of events and managed to brush his teeth with little help.

Next were his kids, he asked Clara to get ready for bed as he settled Shiro in for the night. He then made a warm peacecap and entered Clara’s room where she was up, waiting for him.

He sat down and smiled.

“Hey.”

“Hi mami.”

“I bet you heard papi shouting earlier.”

She wrung her wrists as she nodded. Keith set the peacecap on her nightstand and took both her hands in his, “I want you to know that papi didn’t mean any of those things he said earlier.” He died a little inside as he forced himself to continue, “Touching himself in front of you was extremely inappropriate. His brain injury messed with his self-control.”

“He was masturbating mami.” she supplied helpfully.

He didn’t know what he was expecting but that wasn’t it. “...uh huh.” Yes, Keith was really going to die. “Which is normal and okay so long as it’s in private.”

He suddenly realized what might be the next question. Please, please, please, _please_ , please don’t ask him if he masturbates. He wasn’t ready for his daughter to ask him about his sexual habits. _Ever_.

“Are you having sex with the neighbors?” She asked, concerned.

“Wh- No- Princesa.” He would’ve preferred the masturbation question?? He gathered himself, “Your dad is saying a lot of inappropriate things as he tries to get better. He can’t help it and I’m sorry you had to hear that.”

What if things got worse? He was wondering if maybe he would have to take Lance away as he recovers? Was that the right thing to do?

“If you ever feel uncomfortable or unsure about something papi said or is doing you can walk away and come talk to me or Wellspring minders, okay? You’ll never get in trouble for that. No matter what.”

She nodded.

He felt like he had to say more. “I love you, Shiro and papi very much.”

She smiled, “I love you too, mami.”

They drank the bit of peacecap together.

He closed his eyes just breathing for a moment, He hoped his daughter would make it out okay. If things were tough for him, it had to be worse for his child. He was such a bad mom. He sighed and tucked her in, giving her one last smile.

\---

Quintants later, Lance’s headaches became full blown debilitating migraines. It was restive but Lance was in no condition to see visitors. Keith was pinging Allura and Lotor in hopes of rescheduling when Lance’s medical band lit up.

Sanatorium medics interrupted his call.

“Keith, triage will be there in three doboshes. Lance may experience a seizure, ensure his head is cushioned. Do not move or restrain him.”

Keith paled as he ran back from the hearthcove to their cove where he had let Lance sleep in. Lance was in the throes of a full blown seizure - something Keith had never seen before.

“Oh my god.” Lance’s body was twisted unnaturally on the hammock. His head, arms and legs were jerking hard.

“Keep his head cushioned.”

His hands were shaking badly as Keith stuck pillows around Lance’s head, “What is happening?”

“The biologics have spontaneously advanced to their next stage. We can no longer repress their life cycle. We must eliminate them from Lance’s body. One dobosh.”

Lance was turning blue. An eternity passed before he heard medics dashing in from the transport bay. They quickly swarmed around Lance as two Wellspring minders guided Keith away and shielded Clara and Shiro from the situation.

They whisked him away in a medical transport.

Keith didn’t remember the next few vargas too clearly. His kids were with minders and there was travel and pacing involved.

When he pulled Lance’s medical status he received a “critical (processing)” notification. Keith was alone this time, his Voltron friends were off planet and far away. He sat down on a bench very similar to the one he sat on nearly two deca-phoebs ago.

He couldn’t lose Lance. Not like this. His nightmares were coming true.

He realized he was rocking himself on the bench so he stopped. He buried his face in his hands.

Keith did not know how long he stayed like that but time passed. He thought of everything he had been through. Everything Lance had been through. They had told him the biologics might kill him.

Later, a hand gently pressed against his back. Keith looked up.

There was a medic seated beside him, smiling. “The extraction was successful.” He said quietly, “Lance is well. You may see him.”

\---

Lance was in a dry cove, seated upright on a silky looking bed. The room was smaller, more intimate than the therapeutic coves.

He looked up when Keith entered the room.

“Hi.” He said with his usual flatness. Lance looked tired. Maybe tired of fighting.

Keith grinned even as his hands shook. “Hi Lance, remember me?”

He struggled for a moment. “You’re Keith.”

“That’s right! Do you remember what you used to call me?”

“...Keith?”

Keith laughed as he sat on his bed. This was his Lance now. Why would he keep trying to get the old Lance back when he had this Lance right in front of him trying so hard to survive? He was different but still so precious to Keith.

Keith nodded, “Yup. You called me Keith.”

He practically melted on his alpha. He sunk down burrowing his head under Lance’s chin and wrapped his arms around him, content to listen to his heartbeat. This was Lance. Warm. Alive.

He lingered there and didn’t think of anything else.

Barely noticed Allura’s arrival or her worried questions.

_“How is he?”_

He stayed put in Lance’s arms, happy to maybe live there forever. The biologics had worked. He was back; interested in his family and managed to survive.

_“Hi.” Said Lance._

_“Lance!” Allura replied._

He heard them talking but didn’t really hear them. It didn’t matter.

_“Keith…are you awake?”_

Lance was _alive_.

_“I can feel your quintessence, Lance...mind if I..”_

Nothing could be better than that. He would take Lance home as soon as he could.

_“It’s almost like…with the biologics gone.. I think.. you just need a little... alignment...”_

There was a white shine that brightened the darkness behind his closed eyelids. Allura must be sensing Lance’s quintessence. If Keith could he would give Lance all of his quintessence. Let him live well and raise their kids right in his stead.

Keith sighed.

_“Keith…”_

Then sighed again as his alpha’s arms curled around him. He thought he felt him pressing his cheek on his head.

That can’t be right. He wasn’t emotive anymore.

Keith looked up.

He watched, astonished, as Lance smiled crookedly, the corner of his lips shaking.

His blue eyes were damp.

“I called you _Kitten_.” Lance croaked.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lance is back. Time for some healing. :D


	4. A Thousand Times Again

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It didn’t seem real, Lance’s face brimming with expressions in line with his emotions. Him smiling softly at Keith when he could muster enough strength to look at him, and running careful fingers through Keith’s hair was unreal. Keith was afraid that maybe he had finally cracked under the pressure and was imagining the last few quintants to cope. But things were too vivid, little details too specific, for him to have imagined it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: This one is not the full sexual enchilada but it gets close. Keith and Lance reacquaint themselves. Explicit.

It didn’t seem real, Lance’s face brimming with expressions in line with his emotions. Him smiling softly at Keith when he could muster enough strength to look at him, and running careful fingers through Keith’s hair was unreal. Keith was afraid that maybe he had finally cracked under the pressure and was imagining the last few quintants to cope. But things were too vivid, little details too specific, for him to have imagined it.

Like how uncomfortable it was to be hugged by Allura when she was too swept away with emotions to realize her hold was too much. Not that he cared, she could’ve crushed him and he would’ve been no less grateful and no less thankful. There were no words and no deeds that would ever come close to touching the depth of what he felt for her for what she did. Allura provided a fresh new miracle, returning his bondmate to him; giving Lance his life back; giving his kids their dad back.

“Allura.” He managed to whisper, loving her curious alien scent and her broad teary smile.

“I wish you could see what I see.” She sniffled, wiping her tears away. “He was fighting so hard to piece himself together.” She shook her head in disbelief. ”Keith, his share of quintessence is radiant. It was all gone when he first came back. I am in awe.”

Keith could barely keep it together. He had never been this close to completely losing it and blubbering in front of someone that wasn’t his bondmate. “Thank you.” He said as he shook his head, too emotional to speak above a shaky whisper. “You don’t know how much this means to me. I love you. Thank you.”

She laughed, giving him another squeeze. “I love you too. You and Lance are family. I would do so much more than this for either of you. I would do anything for you.”

“Beautiful.” drawled Lotor, his distinct inflection giving his remarks a vaguely sinister spin. He was leaning against the wall just inside the room, watching. “I too wish to share a similar sentiment. Every quintant when I wake to Allura’s smile and good morning, I think to myself - if only I could fully express my undying love for Keith and Lance. They are so special to me.”

Keith laughed, taking the opportunity to swipe at his eyes with his arm as Allura grinned at her husband, “Are you jealous, Lotor?”

“Immeasurably so.” He said, drolly.

“How special?” Lance whispered, throwing them all for a loop and giving Keith chills.

The biologics and the extraction had taken a heavy toll on Lance’s body as he had succumbed to sleep shortly after Allura’s intervention. The bruising on his face was back and quickly becoming the worst Keith had seen; a parting shot of the biologics. Keith looked him over anxiously from his spot at the foot of the bed.  It was hard to tell from afar whether he had his eyes open due to all the swelling.

“Lance.” said Lotor, surprised.

“Yeah.” Lance said. “Love you.” The humor in his voice. God, was he _smirking_?

Lotor struggled for an appropriate response, replying at last, “He has mistaken me for you.”

That wasn’t right. Keith was sure that his bondmate wasn’t confused. He replied smoothly on Lance’s behalf, “No, he definitely loves you passionately. He always tells me and the kids that you come first.“

Warmth spread through Keith when he saw Lance’s smirk sharpen. He was right.

Allura laughed, delighted by their antics and gave Keith one last hug before joining her husband who simply stared at Keith in amusement. She stuck her hand out for him as she smiled at Keith, “I wish we could stay but our duties do not afford us much free time.”

“That’s okay.” Keith smiled, watching as Lotor took her hand.

They were a handsome couple. They stood tall and powerful yet were approachable in ways that leaders before them were not. Allura and Lotor stood apart as royal bloodlines willing to dismantle the power structure that kept them in power for the sake of a better world. Maybe they can prevent future tragedies.  

Keith hoped the next few hundreds years would be good to them.

“Thank you.” He said meaningfully.

She nodded, her eyes growing damp again. “We’ll talk again soon, Keith.” She glanced back at Lance who appeared to have fallen asleep. “Say goodbye to Lance for us. Let him know we are rooting for his full recovery.”  

“I will. _Thank you_.” He couldn’t say it enough. “Goodbye, Allura. Lotor.” He watched them go and waved at Axca who had stood as sentry just outside the door.

He turned to Lance.

The medics would keep him for three more quintants.

With no one around and Lance sleeping, Keith took the opportunity to look around. The room was made of the same cob as the exterior of the sanatorium and had the same scooped out gourd-like shape that was common to the planet’s interior designs. Benches lining the wall were carved out from the siding while the bed platform looked like it was carved out from the floor. Lance was atop layers of soft bedding weaves. If it weren’t for the tiny gel disc sensors on his temple and the diagnosis feed silently scrolling alien script beside Lance, it would look like he was on vacation, resting in a rustic cabincove.

Keith smiled to himself as he sat on the part of the bench that was flush with the bed. The fact that his bondmate was in a small recovery room was an encouraging sign by itself. It was for short term non-critical care. Keith ran the back of his fingers gently over the bit of Lance’s cheek that wasn’t bruised. His face looked far worse than when he came in.

The medics had told him that Lance’s neural circuitry had subtly changed after Allura and that they were studying her impact via Medspring hoping the research would lead to medical techniques that could simulate her ability on others. It would be wonderful if they could figure out how to replicate powerful Alteans’  manipulation of quintessence and prevent some heartbreak.

Keith very carefully touched the slightly crusted indentations on his alpha’s scalp where they had locked positioning devices to his skull, immobilizing his head during the biologics extraction. The extraction was facilitated by a pulsing field under the guidance of a skilled medic which eradicated the biologics,

The field had negative side effects too. It stripped Lance’s hair of its natural texture; almost felt like crepe paper and just as fragile as it broke off easily if Keith ran his fingers through it. Instead he pressed his palm on his scalp and rubbed his thumb on his forehead.

He couldn’t believe Lance had called him ‘Kitten’ and kept trying to talk to him before the exertion overwhelmed him. Some things he managed to say were still jumbled and confused but it was still the Lance he knew.

Keith kept petting him and began to wonder yet again if maybe he had tricked himself and worriedly scoured Lance’s swollen face for any hint of the new (old) him.

Just when he was positive that it was all in his head, Lance squinted his eyes open and looked at him as if reassuring himself that _Keith_ was still there.

“Kitten.” He sighed as his eyes fluttered shut again.

“I’m here, baby.”

“C’mere.” He mumbled and briefly glanced at Keith as he perched himself on the bed. “Closer.”

Keith laid down on his side and scooted in close, going under the blanket and taking his hand. He worried about how frail Lance looked and felt. He hadn’t noticed it as much when he was back home and moving around but laying mostly still on a sanatorium bed shortly after emergency procedures made his physical changes stand out. Lance was a shadow of who he used to be. His body thin and lacking the healthy muscle tone he maintained through rigorous exercise.

The scar on his bruised face looked bigger somehow, a constant reminder of the close brush with death. Keith pulled Lance’s hand up to his lips and kissed his fingers. He had lost the calluses he had from maneuvering Red and sniper weapons.

Keith heard him swallow and watched, fascinated by any minor curl of lips.

“Can’t think.” Lance said; his eyes remained closed as he frowned.

“You should rest.”

He groaned, “Tired of rest. Wanna fill holes.”

Keith ran his hand down his alpha’s jawline. “You have time for that. The medics said you would be tired from the extraction. It’ll be a few quintants.”

“Extraction?”

“The stuff helping your brain was suddenly hurting you.” He reminded him. “They got it all out.”

“Mm..”

Keith wondered how much he understood or remembered. He delicately pushed his hair away from his temple, careful not to disturb the sensors though they were solidly attached. He choked up again when Lance slowly slid his hand down to his waist and stroked his side with his thumb.

“Kids?” He asked.

Keith sniffled. “I was told not to bring them.” He said quietly, “If all goes well, you’ll see them in three quintants.”

“Okay... Sheryce. Agh, Sheryce.” Lance winced and tried again, “Sheryce.”

“Shiro?”

“Shiro. How old?”

Keith smiled. “Do you remember his birthday last decaphoeb? He’s two decaphoebs and 8 phoebs old.”

Lance glanced at him for a moment. “Almost three..” He mused as his eyes drifted shut. “Hates me.”

Keith pressed his lips together. He kind of did. Their son didn’t take to Lance too well. At best he would look at him curiously before going back to his toys or running away for mom or his sister.

“He’ll warm up to you.”

Lance attempted to nod and stopped abruptly, hissing in pain.

“I’ll call the medics.” Keith said anxiously, sitting up and moving towards the medical screens.

“No.” He took Keith’s hand making his heart leap into his throat again. Lance hadn’t touched him casually in over two decaphoebs. His alpha was really back. “They dope me.” Lance continued, “Wanna be here.”

“Lance…”

It looked like Lance was trying to gather himself. He smiled, squeezing Keith’s hand as he settled back by his side.

“Clara good friends?”

“Yeah, she has a few.”

“Good.” He was wincing but he kept smiling, stubbornly keeping his eyes on Keith. He ran his fingers through a few strands of Keith’s hair.

“You let hair grow out.” He said softly. “No mullet.”

Keith snorted softly. “Yeah... Lance you should rest.”

“I like it.” He squeezed his eyes shut again possibly in an effort to clear his head and sighed. “Your mood has no scent.”

Keith hesitated, not understanding, “No scent?” He was good at translating Lance but not perfect.

“No scent. Just regular.” He gasped quietly then let out a low tortured groan. “My head.”

“Baby, please rest, we’ll talk later.” Keith pleaded as he mentally shelved the conversation for later. He was ready to overrule him and call the medics to get something for his pain. His nerves were fried from all the emotional upheaval the quintant had thrown at him. He was about to burst into tears for no reason.

Lance didn’t say anything else, just nodded slightly then held very still.

\---

Clara was over the moon talking to her dad. She snuggled up next to him when he transferred to the sofa in their hearthcove and happily tolerated his kisses to her head as she scrolled through her vid galleries and caught him up on things. She could understand Lance’s sometimes jumbled words even better than Keith and kept up a flowing conversation the entire night.

Even Shiro seemed interested in this new Lance that smiled and stole his toys, slipping them into his pockets and then forgetting where they were until Shiro retrieved them, grinning when he found extra toys.

Keith sat by his son on the floor, helping him help Lance stack the block toys into a pyramid. He tried to ignore that the quintant was turning into night and his own growing unease. Lance was back and kept glancing at him. It seemed like a given that on their first night together after all the turmoil they went through, they would have sex or at least try to but the thought didn’t give Keith any pleasure. In fact he was dreading any kind of sexual intimacy.

He spent the last few phoebs dealing with Lance’s coerciveness and that took a toll on him. He couldn’t just forget what Lance put him through; pushing selfishly for his own sexual gratification, demanding Keith get him off as if he was there solely for his pleasure, cornering him and pulling at him. He would try to grope him even after Keith said ‘no’ bluntly and tried to get away. When he managed to convince Lance to stop or redirected him, his alpha always responded with a resentful look or hateful demeaning words, ‘Stupid fucking omega.’

It left Keith stinging in anger and hurt but he didn’t dwell on it. He simply pretended it didn’t happen until the next time because he knew Lance wasn’t himself. It didn’t make those moments less painful. He was afraid that he wasn’t going to handle any future sexual overtures very well.

Shiro was getting cranky from exhaustion so Keith busied himself with the unholy nightly routine of getting Shiro to bed. It seemed like his son never wanted to sleep and never wanted anyone else to sleep either.  He felt Lance’s eyes on him as he picked Shiro up who was already scurrying away and whine-crying.

“NO!”

“Need help?”

Keith blinked in surprise and looked back at Lance past his flailing son. “Oh. No, I’m okay.” He then stifled a sigh when he looked at Clara and caught her annoyed expression. He was fairly sure that she mostly thought of Shiro as a nuisance in her life.

“Clara takes care of peacecap?” Lance asked. Strategically?

Keith hesitated and looked over at Clara who perked up with interest. Peacecap had lost its shine on her but the idea of her preparing the adult nightly ritual drink on behalf of her parents and herself while her baby brother was being put to bed was probably very nice on her ego. She looked at Keith anxious as to what he would say.

“Yeah, that’s a good idea.” He said. “If you don’t mind, Princesa?”

She beamed, “Yeah, I can do it! Would you like to help, papi?”

“Yeah.”

She was in the habit of going to bed right after so he was saved from some heavy sighing over peacecap and bedtime from her.

He watched her hop off the bed and Lance smile at him before following her in his wheelchair.

Huh. Okay. Right, there’s a child whining in his arms.

After a terrible time, he headed back out of Shiro’s cove and joined Clara and Lance in the kitchen. They were hunched close together, Clara grinning. She was talking away in Spanish to her dad. He smiled to himself, heartened to see his daughter so happy.

They spent a long time talking or listening to Clara fill Lance in on things. Eventually, it was time for bed. Keith couldn’t look at Lance as he said, “Tired, princesa. Sleeping.”

“Okay! Good rest, papi. Love you.” She was on her best behavior now that Lance was back. He smirked into his cup, wondering how long that would last.

“Love you too.” There was a _smile_ in his tone. Keith grinned.

“Good rest, mami.”

“Good rest.” He hugged her and watched her go then turned back to his cup, willing himself to look at Lance but unable. He felt his eyes on him.

Then he felt Lance take his hand in his and kiss the back of it. “Good rest.”

He nodded as he heard him start to wheel away. Keith glanced up and realized Lance wasn’t heading the right way. His alpha still needed a lot of help.

“Lance, no, that’s the guestcove.”

He nodded awkwardly but didn’t change direction, “I know, Kitten.”

“Lance.” Keith stood up and caught up with him and tried to meet his eyes. Lance stuck his arms on his lap and kept his head down, refusing to look at him.

“We share a bedcove, remember?”

“I know.”

“You don’t want to sleep in our bedcove?”

Lance seemed to square his shoulders. He looked stricken and anguished when he looked at Keith. “I was..” He shook his head. “Fucker. Trying to force you..”

Oh, so Lance remembered. He remembered some of it. Keith frowned, trying to sort through his mixed feelings. It wasn’t his alpha’s fault the things he did. He really didn’t know any better. “I don’t want you to sleep there.”

Lance frowned back, “Kitten...please. I can’t.”

He looked at him speculatively. Then felt guilty that most of what he felt was relief. He nodded. “Do you need any help?”

“I’m okay. Good rest.”

“Good rest.”

He leaned forward and kissed Lance on the lips, petal-soft and kind. His heart skipped because Lance kissed back.

\---

Shortly thereafter, Lance took over in his own recovery.

Sometimes the pain would seep into his bones and he would lay in bed trying not to cry out in agony.

But there were less and less quintants like that. When he could he would research different kinds of therapy activities. He would always fully engage the Wellspring sanatorium and his minders. He received treatments for vertigo and pain and walking therapy and speech therapy, life skills therapy and therapy therapy..

The constant evaluations dwindled but not before the medics informed him that the biologics and Allura had impacted his cellular breakdown. The expected deterioration wasn’t there. He was not aging normally for a human but more analyses was needed for better gauging of the effects. Keith tried not to think about that eventual future but it brought him comfort that he might have Lance longer than expected.

Some sensors were removed. Lance started out with multiple medical bands. He stopped using the bathroom aid one because he felt he was relying on its warning instead of relearning his own physical cues. So he dealt with the embarrassment of relearning when he needed to go. There was a lot of startled - “Bathroom. Fuck!”- because when he noticed it was usually too late.

He drew the line at Keith helping him any further with the bathroom. He re-learned his body and dealt with any accidents.

As far as the relationship between them, things were sometimes oddly formal. Lance tried to be helpful in little ways. Keeping up with house maintenance. Laying out clothes for Shiro. Dealing with Clara when she was working on her pet projects instead of applying herself on her Wellspring assignments. Keith hadn’t even realized that she was doing that.

He would catch Lance giving him longing looks when he thought Keith wasn’t watching. Sometimes the weird formality dissipated and they spent a lot of time kissing, neither one believing their luck. On a very good quintant, before communal post, Lance took his hand and kissed his palm and each of his fingers slowly and carefully and placed his hand over his heart before placing a cup of spiced starnut in his other hand.

“See you tonight?” He smiled.

“Yeah.” Keith grinned back.

The very good quintant became a very good night except for the fact that his bedswing was so empty. He had his alpha back but they weren’t sharing the bed. Well, Keith had had enough. Why deal with lonely nights when his alpha was right there??

He slipped out of his bed, tucked his pillow under his arm and headed straight for the guest cove. Lance looked up from his studies when he pushed the door open and tensed, watching silently as Keith climbed onto the bedswing. He put his vid on the nightstand as Keith unapologetically settled into the warmth of the sheets and rested his head on Lance’s chest.

Keith sighed, nuzzling into the comforting scent. An arm slowly wrapped around his waist and tucked him in close. That feeling of safety and belonging was so so good. He simmered in the feeling for a while before his curiosity got the best of him. He pulled back to see Lance’s expression and swallowed. Lance met his gaze, eyes half-lidded and full of longing.

The scar was still jarring, how it interrupted his features, but it didn’t matter at all. Keith didn’t realize his hand was moving until he was cupping Lance’s cheek. He felt his heart skip when Lance leaned into his touch gratefully, closing his eyes, touch starved.

When he looked up again, he whispered, agonized, “Kitten, I’m so sorry.”

Keith bit his lip, considering his words and how he felt. Time was making things better. Clearer and less raw. “You don’t have to apologize. You weren’t yourself.”

“It still happened.” Lance shook his head, not forgiving himself. “I can’t believe I did that to you.”

Keith smiled. “You didn’t.”

He caught Lance’s face crumpling before he drew him in and held him tight.

Keith always joined him in the guestcove after that.

Waking up pressed into Lance’s side was a regular affair. Lance would watch him at first sun, smiling, which Keith realized was in response to his own soft smile.

\---

A significant amount of his physical therapy was some form of swimming or aquatic exercise, first in liquiform where he could also try to walk for longer periods of time and then later in nearby regional springs with a Wellspring therapist.

One of the first things he did was buy boxing equipment of which he kept in the backyard in the dry season. Keith was more than happy to steal some time with the equipment as it was a nice change of exercise routine and sometimes he needed to punch something. He was sad he hadn’t thought of getting something like that before.

When they could get a few ticks away from the kids, they would watch each other.

Keith had thought that maybe he had dried out but watching his alpha’s lean swimmer body fill out was starting to have a direct impact to the seat of his underwear.

\---

They moved back to the main bedcove as staying in the small guest was silly.

\--

Before the mission changed everything, if Keith was squirming around in bed, Lance would pull him close while they were both still half asleep and slide his hand over his butt, dipping his fingers into his ass or the inner entrance of his pussy and stretching him out to fuck him or to get him off quick.

Keith was now squirming around in bed for the very same reasons. Lance’s scent was working him up in his sleep and he _ached_. He moaned when an arm rolled him onto Lance’s side and arched his hips in response when fingers started to slide under his pajamas. That was a real touch.

Keith stiffened as his eyes flew open in time to catch Lance’s own wide-eyed surprise.

They stared at each other. Lance awkwardly moved his arm back up to a safer area. His gaze went down to Keith’s sleep shirt and back up again. He glanced down again. There wasn’t anything to see there. He must’ve been thinking back to when Keith actually had tits from pregnancy. Definitely as he ran the back of his hand over his chest anyway before taking his hand.

That little move triggered a nuclear meltdown of Keith’s loins. He hadn’t been touched right in any kind of way in almost two decaphoebs.

“I’m.. going to go make a terrible breakfast.” Keith said to distract himself. “Do you need anything?”

“I love you.”

Keith sucked in a breath. Lance looked downright melancholy. “I love you too.”

That sad gaze warmed as if heartened. Lance smiled crookedly.

Keith had to go before something happened. There was still some sort of gulf between them. He could feel Lance’s eyes on him as he left.

\---

Lance took care of Shiro and Clara and took over most household duties. He stayed in the kitchen a lot, struggling to get the cooking sequence right which was very challenging to him. He also couldn’t quite connect the dots with Clara’s assignments but sat nearby with their son, listening and asking questions. He played with Shiro a bunch. A whole bunch. Shiro would seek him out and steal him away from Clara which she did not appreciate at all.

And anytime he looked at Keith it was with that smile or a sad longing look.

His scent seemed healthier somehow. He was standing for longer periods of time and would stand next to him for no reason if he was in the kitchen or in the backyard, pretending to be deeply invested in the vid in his hands. Keith would look at him in amusement. He was forced to look up to meet his alpha’s eyes and try not to laugh at his politely inquiring look. Eventually Lance would grin back and Keith would get a healthy reminder of his physical attraction to him.  

Lance was simply smiling at Keith all the time. Combined with how he seemed to watch him like he was memorizing every detail, Keith wasn’t sure if he was going to survive this onslaught.

He was very very aware of how ridiculously sex deprived he was because he couldn’t even look at his bondmate without dribbling slick. Lance must’ve noticed the added layers of protective fabric to their bed hammock. He couldn’t possibly miss the sudden appearance of underwear liners in the wash that he folded when there was none before but he never said a word.

It was night after night of feeling sorry for himself while watching his alpha watch him. What were they doing? Something had to give.

Keith licked his lips, squeezing his legs together needily as memories of all the ways Lance had taken him ran through his head. He placed his hand on Lance’s chest and met his eyes as he slowly ran his hand down below the sheets to Lance’s pajama bottoms. He was gratified to find his very obvious erection. Lance bit his lip placing his hand over Keith’s and watching him as his breath grew slightly labored.

Keith pulled away long enough to take his pants off under the covers. He shivered hotly at the way Lance tracked his movements. Next thing he knew he was moving, shoving Lance flat on his back as he scooted up on his knees and grabbed one of the four posters that the bed swing was supported by. He swung a leg over his alpha, straddling Lance’s head and burying his face in his arms as Lance grabbed him by the hips and shoved him closer still. He dove into his pussy like a starved man at a feast.

\---

Keith had a new problem.

“You’re not scent-y.” Lance said one morning.

Was that said in disappointment?

“..sorry?”

“I can’t scent your dynamic. Your moods are blank. Gone.”

Keith wondered what that was like. Maybe it was like scenting non-humans. Their non-human friends were weirdly blank.

He rolled to his side. “What do I smell like?”

Lance kissed him. “Like you but without the seasoning. No mood.”

“I got plenty mood.” He smirked.

“No, not you.” Lance teased as Keith’s smirk softened.  
  
“It was cheating anyway, reading my moods. You were a bloodhound. I didn’t appreciate it.”

Lance grinned. “I can still figurine. Agh. I mean figure you in out. Figure you out.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah, like right now you’re very nasal jealous.”

Keith laughed. “Yeah, I’m burning with nose envy right now.”

“Called it.”

Keith snorted and got up to get Clara up for Wellspring. He headed to the bathroom first.

“I’ll get you your meds.”

“Thanks.”

\---

Keith’s new problem was Lance’s new habit.

Not picking up on pheromonal scents bothered Lance a great deal. The scent he missed the most was his omega’s and he was obsessed with trying to find a way to get that back in some form.  So Lance kept _tasting_ him. He tended to always follow a kiss to the lips with a tongue-y sucking swipe on Keith’s scent gland.  At night, he would stick his nose right under Keith’s ear and breathe deeply.

Then he would try to move to his armpit which Keith would swat him away because that was a friggen weird move.

His alpha was unintentionally teasing him for quintants on end then very intentionally teasing him by spending many a varga between his legs eating him out. Keith had never been more licked in his life.

Keith and his dick and his pussy was going to _explode_ , he wanted dick so bad.

The quintants went from Keith getting up early in the morning so he could make breakfast for Clara and Shiro to Lance slowly, carefully and methodically spending the whole night before pre-preparing breakfast and lunch as well as he could so he could cut Keith a break and very importantly clear his morning.

Yes, for eating him out.  

Keith was gaining a disturbing pavlovian response to Lance making kid snacks.

More often than not, he woke to his alpha’s tongue burrowed between his legs, diligently attending to his folds and swollen clit. The wet laps were self indulgent and unhurried as if giving Keith head was more than satisfying for Lance. It seemed to be case as he would inevitably groan as he lapped, causing light purry vibrations to travel through Keith. There was usually a big wet spot in Lance’s pyjamas when he was done.

Other times he would focus on Keith’s dick, using the best wet pressure as his thumb teased Keith’s clit. He would lick at Keith’s slick but never truly penetrate him. Instead he stayed on the outside causing a slow intense build kind that left Keith trembling and clenching the bedsheets.

After, Keith would try hard to start the quintant while Lance tried just as hard to get him back on the bed for another sit down on his face. He was diligently reacquainting himself with all aspects of his old life including and maybe especially the taste and shape and texture of Keith’s private parts.

Keith must have done something good in a previous life. Maybe. Or maybe this was hell. Cause he was getting some but not exactly getting some - his insides ached for attention but neither of them were crossing that threshold.

Strangely Lance didn’t want him to return the blowjob favor. So all Keith could do was lay back and savor his attentiveness.

There was a big difference in his behavior before and after the biologics removal and Allura. If Keith moved in a way that could be construed as ambivalent, instead of ploughing past the body language unaware and too damaged to care,  Lance would look up curiously to assess him. He made sure things were okay before he did anything further.

It was really Lance sharing his bed and life again.

Keith had a very big problem. This was the worst best way to slowly die ever.

\---

“Do you want us to get you anything, mami?”

“No, I’m okay. Have fun with papi.”

Keith hugged his daughter and tried not to be a nervous wreck when Lance wheeled into the transport. They were going to the Wellspring market together. His son was already at the Wellspring as Lance had begun to insist Keith take a break from the kids every movement.

He was usually with Clara and Shiro in another room or stayed with them at the Wellspring but this is the first time his daughter and his alpha were venturing without supervision or caretakers. He watched and repressed hard the urge to grab his daughter and wheel Lance back out from the transport.

Lance hated him grabbing the wheelchair anyway. It was a personal invasion, same as if someone suddenly grabbed an unsuspecting pedestrian and forcibly redirected them down a different path without their consent.

Lance held his gaze as Clara settled her stuff in the transport. Kept smiling as Clara sat down and waved at Keith. He winked at him just as the transport bay doors slid shut.

Keith was not okay.

Oh my fucking god all he did was wink and Keith was having an existential crisis. He scrambled for his bedcove, nearly knocking himself out on the door he stumbled through. He tore his pants off and climbed onto Lance’s side of the bed swing, cramming his face into his alpha’s pillows and moaning plaintively.

He got his knees under himself and spread his knees wide, arching his hips. Keith pretended he was in heat and desperately presenting his ass for a knotting as he burrowed into his alpha’s pillows. He imagined his weight on top of him and his cock nudging its way inside. In heat, the feel and pressure and size of his dick was perfect. Clamping down would make him shudder in satisfaction. He would feverishly hope for a knot that’ll keep the cock and ejaculate trapped inside him.

Keith dropped to his side, trembling as he stuck fingers inside his inner entrance which was nothing like his alpha’s cock. He thrusted aggressively, moaning as slick trickled on to the sheet.

His fingers were still buried inside as he shoved one of his alpha’s pillows between his legs, frantically rubbing his dick and clit on it for the friction. He imagined how Lance would latch onto one of his nipples, sucking harshly as kept pumping into his pussy.

He came all over the pillow. Fuck. He groaned.

God he was pathetic.

\---

Lance kept right on smiling at Keith.

“Oops.” He would say when pulling Keith onto his lap as he wheeled by and continued his trek to wherever. When the kids weren’t around, he’d stick his hand in Keith’s pants and work his pussy and cock. Keith was so needy, his eyes would flutter and he’d reach orgasm easily with that perfect scent surrounding him.

Often Lance would look at him a little sadly afterwards. Eventuall, he revealed what was bothering him.

“You used to fuck me?” Lance wondered.

“Huh?”

He ran his hand over his half-hard erection purposely. “You don’t get hard.”

Oh. He shook his head. “That’s normal for me. It doesn’t mean anything.” It wasn’t terribly unusual for omegas to have one reproductive system more dominant than the other.

“Oh.” Lance seemed to be relieved for some reason. Keith acknowledged awkwardly, “I.. never really cared, I was more than satisfied with how things were if you remember.” And if he remembered right, Lance was just as satisfied, so it hadn’t been a problem..maybe now things would be different..?

“I couldn’t remember right” Lance said, his perpetual half-smile curving his lips. “I thought maybe I wasn’t doing it for you.”

“You’re definitely doing it for me.” Keith hurried to reassure him.

Lance ran his hand warmly down Keith’s side. “So you don’t mind the floor? Agh” he shook his head, “Fuck. I mean swaddling. Uh, no” He struggled, “bottoming.”

Did Keith mind bottoming? Well, if he didn’t get some dick real soon his pussy was going to rebel, gain sentience and fight them both. He half expected it to gain the ability to talk just so it could start screaming ‘FUCK ME.’ anytime he was anywhere near his bondmate.

He kept all that crazy to himself as he said, “I like it.” He trailed off casually for a moment but part of his arousal must’ve come across as Lance’s scent changed and his gaze grew a little more steadfast and darker. Keith distracted himself by running his hand through Lance’s hair. It was healthier now. It felt thick like it used to be.

“Did you want to bottom?” Keith asked. “We could try toys. I can visit the sanatorium if you want..I could..” Go to a medic and figure out options.

“I’m happy to fuck you.”

Slick happened. Also, Keith’s loins swooned in delight? They were definitely planning a coup d'etat. “Oh.”

He changed the subject before Keith could get uncomfortable. “Anyway I was reviewing a speech exercise when something happened.”

“Yeah?”

Lance’s eyes narrowed. “Look at this supposed flat surface.” He released the magnetic lock and let go of the push wheel and began to roll back. “What’s wrong with this photo?” He asked as they slowly rolled backwards away from the hearthcove. “Would this be happening if this was actually a flat surface??” He wheeled back in disgust and put the brake on, the wheel lighting up briefly as he engaged the locks. The chair was fully automated but he chose to use it manually for the most part.

Keith smiled in amusement. He glanced at the time as he slid off Lance’s lap. “Are you hungry?”

Lance shrugged. “Maybe?”

“Finish the exercise and I can fix you something.”

The wheels suddenly lit up again, he disengaged the lock. “Sorry can’t hear you. Runaway chair.”

“I can see you pushing the wheels.” Keith watched him head out the main entrance.

“Can’t hear you.” Lance singsonged from far away.

\---

Lance picked up the empty cup from the table and stared directly at Keith as he let it fall onto the floor. _Again_. Keith kept picking it back up for him, unsure what he was playing at and getting angrier but holding it in.

He did it again, dropping it right by his chair. Keith gritted his teeth and dutifully bent by him to pick up the cup.

“I want my omega back.” Lance said just as Keith grabbed hold of the cup.

Keith stood back up. “Huh?”

“You’re my minder with benefits. I don’t want another minder, I have a thousand of those. I want my bondmate. My partner.”

“I’m your partner, Lance.”

He knocked the cup back down as soon as Keith put it back on the table.

Keith’s first instinct was to kill him, then he tried to be reasonable and help him out.  Then he realized Lance was fully cognizant and this was insane. What was he doing? Lance was obviously screwing with him. Maybe he was screwing with him for a while in other ways? That pissed him off.

He grabbed the cup and slammed it down in front of Lance. “If you fucking do that again, I will fucking kill you.”

He was too annoyed to care that Lance was grinning as he was watched him go. He wasn’t gonna help him with _shit_.

\---

He kept helping though.

They were long overdue for laundry. The kids were with Shiro for the quintant.

Keith eyed the one shirt left, it was an old shirt of Lance’s that was a gift that fit him too big. It went down to Keith’s thighs. Strangely he wore it all the time when Lance wasn’t himself and stopped wearing it when Allura healed him. Keith grabbed it and put it on and threw his pants and underwear in the wash. He caught a glimpse of one of Shiro’s favorite toys strewn in their backyard.

He went out and picked it up and noticed another one peeking out from the garden cove. He went over to pick that one up and discovered that Shiro had at some point dumped all of his poppacoos in the outdoor cove. He groaned and began to gather them up.

When he was done, he turned and froze. Lance was standing by the garden cove entrance, resting his folded hands over his quad cane. His heart leapt to his throat for a second. How long had he been there watching? Lance looked tall and relaxed. He forgot how hot Lance really was.

Lance walked over to him and swept Keith’s bangs back then rested his hands on Keith’s hips over his shirt. It made a shiver run up Keith’s spine.

“Hey.”

“Hi.” Keith replied.

“I made lunch for us.”

“Oh” Keith blinked, “Okay.” He put the toys down in a pile.

Lance gestured at their outdoor table. “Have a seat.”

Keith watched him leave and return shortly with the food.

“I got this, Kitten.” Lance said patiently when Keith tried to help.

Keith sat back down then felt a tingling in his stomach as Lance drew near, eyes and smile soft as he placed a plate in front of him.

“I made sandwiches. They’re in the right order this time.” He struggled for the longest time to make one correctly.

“Very good.” Keith said, truly impressed and happy he had come so far.

Lance laughed as he sat down beside him. “Fruit petals smoothie. too.” He said as he slid one of the drinks towards Keith.

“Looks great.”

“Thanks.”

They ate as Keith snuck looks at Lance. He looked so good. Relaxed and healthy. He smelled so good, too. Keith shifted as a spark of heat started to build between his legs.

“Plans for today, beautiful?”

Keith hesitated, unsure how to react. What was that? Lance never called him that. He wouldn’t have liked that normally but everything was in this weird new place.

“Beautiful?”

“Beautiful. Stunning. Lifegiver. Force of nature.”

He looked away, rolling his eyes as he bit into his sandwich. “Uh huh.”

“Beautiful.” Lance insisted in a way that made Keith look at him. He had a feeling that he was talking more than what Keith looked like. He felt short of breath all of a sudden and busied himself with chewing.

“No plans in particular.” He said eventually, deciding to ignore the beautiful thing. “I was going to help you with whatever and then go for a run before the kids got back.”

“Mm...don’t really need help.”

“Yeah?”

“Yup.”

“Huh.”

They ate in companionable silence. The backyard was lush in vegetation and surrounded by an embankment wall made of native moss, vines and small stone tiles that made a mosaic of repeating square patterns. It was a nice place to relax during the dry season.

Lance stood and took their plates and cups back inside. He remained standing when he returned and  asked, “Come here?”

Keith hesitated then stood as well, worried that Lance was maybe hurting and couldn’t sit back down. When he reached him, Lance wrapped his arms around him and peppered him with gentle kisses.

Keith relaxed and smiled up at him.

“Remember when we used to fuck all the time?” Lust suddenly made itself known and shot off the scales for Keith as he lost his breath. Lance’s way of speaking to Keith was actually getting courser as he got better. The way they spoke to each other was how they learned to cope with the vulgarity of their actions during the war despite Shiro’s attempts at propriety. It was in a way familiar and much more comforting than the odd politeness that pulled them further apart sometimes.

Keith took a deep breath. This really was his bondmate. “Of course.”

“I miss that. Miss you.”

“I’m right here.”

“Are you?”

“What do you mean?”

Lance smiled. ”You hold back. You treat me like your patient or like one of the kids. I don’t want that. I want my bonded omega back. My partner.” Keith bit his lip as Lance clasped his hands.

“Do I really do that?” He was so used to being caretaker. He was the main caretaker for decaphoebs.

“Yeah.” Lance’s gaze was running down Keith’s body desirously. “May I?” He rubbed his wrist with his thumb.

“May I what?”

Lance released one of his hands to slide his fingers to the small of his back, fingers ghosting over the crease of his ass. “May I touch you?”

Keith felt winded all of a sudden. “That’s a first.” He said trying to sound normal and not like he was about to have an orgasm at the mere implication of more happening.

Lance smiled as he insisted. “Yeah but may I?”

Keith took a deep breath. If Lance’s nose was still working he would’ve been choking on Keith’s pheromones. Had Keith been wearing underwear, they would’ve burst into flames from the state of hot arousal he was in.   

Keith huffed and said much more casually than he felt, “Knock yourself out.”

He tugged Keith close and leaned in to kiss him. Keith locked lips with him and wrapped his arms around Lance as he felt his cock hardened. He moaned into the kiss as he squeezed his thighs together at the first sign of wetness trickling inside. The swipes of tongue was quickly growing out of control. That familiar mouth, that scent that meant so much to him, Keith’s fingers dug into Lance’s back.

Lance slid his hand down his ass, slipping under his shirt and moaning into the kiss when he encountered wetness. “I want this and you back, Kitten” He gasped when he drew back, “I don’t need a caretaker. I have a caretaker. I want my grown omega treating me like his grown alpha partner.”

Keith tilted his hips, arching towards Lance’s touch invitingly. Obviously Lance didn’t want him taking care of him anymore. He didn’t need that either. That role wasn’t something Keith particularly wanted anyway. He wanted Lance back as his alpha, too.

Lance wormed a finger inside, pushing into his inner entrance. Keith tried not to squirm too desperately. He was burning up, turning into ash in Lance’s arms.

Lance wanted his bondmate back, “Let me hear you, Kitten.”

Keith felt his face heat up as his words lit a long dormant fire inside him. He had been resilient and strong for his family. Too caught up in strength to let his guard down or let go to anyone. He had mentally hunkered down as a survival mechanism.

Lance pulled out and thrust a second finger inside. Coaxing him to let go to him, pushing at his defenses, wanting his bondmate to have him again as his partner instead of his guardian.

He begged, “Kitten.”

Keith shivered eating up his alpha’s scent. Fuck it. He had control of everything else in life, it was refreshing and freeing to let Lance have his way.

“Fuck.” Keith gasped. Lance, his partner in life returned to him, half dead but now somehow miraculously whole. “ _Lance_.” He wanted Lance badly; wished for him to fuck him until he screamed and wished his own male bits would cooperate for once so he could fuck him back and have every piece of his alpha too.

The decaphoeb worth of bad stuff had withered away to nothing, replaced by a heavy reminder of how things were before and how they could be again. Fuck it, either one of them could die at any moment and eventually be forgotten when they passed so why sacrifice the precious steps towards oblivion when it was possibly all they had.  Keith was going to live his life to the fullest and give Lance his all.

Keith’s mouth parted as he panted. Lance’s fingers were embedded inside and thrusted even deeper. He could feel his body squirming as a low whine escaped him. His alpha could not catch the shift in his scent but he could feel how his slick dribbled and see how his body grew frantic.

“You’re soaked.” Lance whispered. He ran a soothing hand over the side of his hip. He pulled out so he could slide a third finger inside. He tried but then went back to two fingers.“You like your alpha filling you up?” He asked quietly, the familiar timbre of his voice thrumming though Keith’s blood.

Keith squeezed tight and rocked up to his toes then back down on his alpha’s fingers. That’s right, Lance was _his_ alpha.

“You’re mine.” Keith hissed. “ _Please_ fuck me.” He begged as Lance kept his fingers firm and steady, wriggling deep inside each time Keith rocked back. He could scent Lance’s response. He was starting to pant too. The obscene was somehow sacred with Lance. Standing between Lance’s legs getting worked open, arms surrounding him, with his heart in his alpha’s hands, Keith mentally gave his all to Lance.

“I want to fuck you so bad.” Lance said, sounding desperate.

He then shuddered as more slick seeped out of Keith.

“I’ll kill you if you don’t fucking fuck me.” Keith gasped.

“Kitten-”

Lance pulled out and bent Keith over the table, pulling his shirt up over his back. He prodded his hole with two fingers again tight together. The angle let him press in deeper.

“Remember all the sexcapades?” Lance asked as he rocked his hand.

Keith felt soaked inside; his need for a good dicking becoming unbearable. He demanded, “Remind me.” He gasped as Lance suddenly bent on top of him, wrapping an arm around his chest and sucking on his scent gland.

“You’re gonna need that armchair of mine once I’m done with you.” Lance promised. He meant wheelchair.

Keith laughed partly through his moan. “You breaking my legs?” He asked as he gripped the arm on his chest.

“No but when you’re good and ready, I’m spending a few days pounding that sweet puss of yours.”

His words were searing Keith’s bones. He groaned and said quietly, “I’m ready right the fuck now. I want it.”

Keith heard a strangled inhale that didn’t match the moment. He tried to turn but Lance had stuck  his face on the side of Keith’s neck. “Lance?”

“Sorry.” He whispered and laughed at himself, shaking his head. “Sorry… just... thought you lost interest along the way.”

A pang of sorrow struck Keith so hard he nearly swooned “Lance, I want it. I fucking want you so bad.” He wriggled on Lance’s fingers, thrusting in a lurid imitation of sex, letting his body do most of the talking for him.

He felt Lance kissing the side of his neck in response. “I know, Kitten.” He said, choked up. “You’re so wet. What a good omega. My bondmate.”

It pleased something primal in him for his alpha to love his body’s responsiveness. He ate up his words and reveled in indulging his alpha’s will, knowing that he could be vulnerable with him without compromising himself.

When Lance pulled out and stepped back, Keith swung around and clung to him, “Fuck me right the fuck now.”

Lance inhaled sharply, a brief self-deprecating laugh. “ We need to move to the a bed or the couch cause I‘m gonna break myself here. I wish I could pick you up like I used to.“ All that standing and pulling weight around came with a cost

Yes to all that but Keith couldn’t make himself let go. Irrationally he insisted, “Fuck me.”

He felt Lance shiver. “Let’s get back inside, Kitten. Help me?”

Keith nodded and wrapped Lance’s arm around his shoulder so he could help him back into the house.

They made it to the hearthcove where Keith sunk down on the couch. Lance insisted on crouching down between Keith’s legs.

Keith buried his fingers in Lance’s hair. He was there, solid and real and smiling softly at him in their home, continually calling him _Kitten_.  It shook Keith to his very core. That Lance’s eyes were relaxed and so lit up with life. That he was all there, smiling at him somehow whole and alive and touching him.

Lance was _there_.

It pierced Keith straight through his gut. His stalwart decaphoebs-long endurance shattering. Keith couldn’t talk, couldn’t move. The inner fortress was compromised.

Lance was _there_.

Somehow they were gifted with another chance to lead their lives together as partners.

The dry sob that rattled his chest startled him as his insides felt like they were cracking under a great weight. The weight of all that had happened since Lance’s mission. The overwhelming relief and gratitude that he had been spared the permanent loss of his alpha was choking him. He couldn’t breathe as he shook.

Lance stiffened and sat up, wide-eyed, “Kitten.”

His breath was stolen by a guilt so great that all he managed was a mangled gasp as he whispered in broken agony, “I was so fucking weak.”

Lance winced and smiled sympathetically, easing his hands over his thighs and then wrapping his arms around his waist. “Big fucking lie.”

“Fucking weak.” He asserted. The words dripped with self loathing as he shout-gasped in agony, “Fucking weak! I was going to get rid of the kids! I was gonna leave them at the Wellspring! Fuck, I thought about killing them! I hated them. Hated you. I resented you so fucking much!!”   

His alpha was smiling affectionately, his own eyes misting over. “You don’t hate us.”

“I do!” He gasped, “Fucking-” He wept despondently, his body curling in, his arms wrapping around his waist as if he were in great physical pain. “Shut up and just fucking fuck me.” He gasped.

Lance’s laughter was hushed, his own voice sounding clogged as he said, “While you’re crying your face off? No honey.”

He felt him struggle to sit next to him but he couldn’t move a muscle to help him. Lance made it then cuddled his listless body in his arms.  Keith continued brokenly, hating himself, “I should fucking-” Lance squeezed him in his arms and said patiently, “You don’t have to do anything except cry it out, baby.“

He wished he hadn’t said that; it freed him up to sob and babble more things that he had held in for so long. He took a stuttering breath as he said, "I fucking resented you and you were fucking dead! I made you go and look what happened to you. I killed you!”

“That’s news to me. Thought I was alive this whole time.”

“I killed you!” He insisted.

“No you didn’t.” Lance said adamantly, “Going on the mission was my choice.”

“No, I fucking force fed you horseshit and-”

“I would do it again. Except maybe quack and roll during that last bit.”

A burst of fresh tears as he cried, “That’s not funny! “ He wailed, sick of all the pain and burden.“Oh, I can’t handle this shit.”

“It’s okay.” Lance tugged him close, rocking him in his arms. He was shifting like he was wiping his face and Keith could hear him sniffling too. “We’re okay. You’re okay, baby.”

“Oh god.” Keith sobbed, afraid that he might never stop crying. When was this going to end? “You fucking died. What the fuck was I supposed to do?”

“Exactly what you did. You kept living.”

He snorted in self-hatred. “I don’t know if you can call what I did _living_.”

“You lived, Kitten.” Lance tone was tinged with heavy guilt as he continued, “And you loved our kids when I couldn’t do that right. You kept living every day the best you could.” his voice trembled, barely above a whisper as he added, “And you kept me together. Forgave some unforgivable shit.”

He wasn’t sure how long he cried but the floodgates had burst open and there was no holding back. Keith cried until he was too exhausted to cry. He was so very tired overall. Endless quintants of questioning every single step and moment, never feeling adequate enough, having terrible unforgivable thoughts about ending his children, always being ‘on’ and guiding Lance through his recovery. Afraid that this was his life with Lance for the rest of their time together yet determined to live it. War was a nightmare and its ramifications turned out to be even worse.

A heavy exhaustion blanketed him as he slumped over on Lance’s chest. “I just can’t.”

“You already _did_.” Lance sniffled as he whispered, “You can do anything.” Keith felt him moving and watched numbly as he pulled off his shirt, so he was left wearing a thin undershirt. Keith grabbed the offered shirt immediately, blowing his nose loudly to weepy chuckling. He stuck his nose on a clean spot of the t-shirt, blatantly savoring his alpha’s scent.

Keith’s sniffling died down as he rested his head on Lance’s shoulder, his forehead bumping against his alpha’s jawline.  Things were getting muzzy and dark and he gave in to an old exhaustion.

He slept through Lance moving him. Slept through Shiro returning their kids. Slept right through dinner and his kids loudly trying to be quiet around him.

His sleep was the most peaceful he had ever had in his life.

The release from the decaphoebs long build up brought him a sense of well-being he never thought he would feel again.  Such a heavy burden lifted. He was light and at ease. When he awoke he was enveloped by his alpha’s scent along with the nearby children scent of Shiro and Clara. He stirred reaching blindly for his kids before opening his eyes, realizing his arms were partly trapped by a blanket.

His head was on a pillow and he felt Lance petting his hair. He was on his side and looked down at himself noting that he was now wearing another one of Lance’s t-shirts. His kids were beside him on the bed hammock. He had no recollection of being moved but the wheelchair was nearby. His family was gathered together on the bed.

Clara was near the edge of the bed swing, sitting cross-legged as she paid half mind to a vid they had streaming while tinkering with another one of her build kits. Bits and pieces from her kit were all over the bed.

Shiro was between them, half-rolled onto a pillow, asleep with thumb in his mouth as a soft alien piglet toy drooped out of his lax hand.

It really was a miracle that he hadn’t woken up with his kids there.

Clara seemed to be fighting sleep, she glanced at him which he suspected she had been doing for a while and brightened, “Mami!”

Shiro’s eyes snapped open as he startled awake, yelling as if he had been waiting too and accidentally snoozed. “Mami!’ He said before he actually saw him. He reached for Keith who pulled him into his arms.

He felt Lance squeeze his shoulder as Clara scooted closer and laid on her side, curling in until her head bumped Keith’s shoulder. Her eyes remained fixed on the kit pieces she had in her hand. Keith kissed the top of her head to his heart’s content.

“Hi Princesa.”

“Hi mami.” She looked up at him, probingly.”Your eyes are puffy.”

They felt puffy, probably from all the crying. “Yeah, I slept a lot.” He smiled.

He felt Shiro settle in and doze off, too tired to actually do or say anything even though his mom was finally with him again.

Keith closed his eyes, taking in the baby scent of his children and the alpha scent of Lance.

Clara settled in to chat. She set her kit aside and grabbed hold of Keith’s hand, idly playing with his fingers. “You must’ve been really tired.”  Keith smiled drawing her hand to his face and kissing the palm of her hand.

“Yeah. Did you have a good time with Shiro?” He asked hoarsely. He felt Lance running his fingers through his hair.

“Mmhm! We went to the amusement center. I had a bunch of flower floss.”

“Sounds great, princesa.”

He ran his fingers through her hair as she talked through the vid.

Keith sighed and smiled at his daughter and cuddled his son. He hooked his ankle around Lance’s and soaked it all in - how all he had been through led him to this small miracle of happiness.

\---

Later that night, Keith clung to Lance and kissed him.

“Kitten…” Lance said between kisses. “Before things get too heated...” He kissed him again then cradled his bondmate’s face. “I want to take it slow.”

Keith was suspicious, “Why?” It didn’t seem like that earlier.

“I don’t want to hurt you-” Lance started laughing at Keith’s unimpressed, mocking, and resentful stare. “Stop looking at me like that.”

“I’ll stop when you fucking fuck me.”

Lance wrapped an arm around him, pulling him closer by his ass.

“Can we work up to it? I’m still alpha-sized and you’re a snack sized omega that hasn’t had sex for a while.“

“Maybe I’ve been using an alpha toy this whole time.” He hadn’t, all it did was remind him of what he didn’t have and he didn’t have time and he wasn’t a big fan of toys in the first place.

“That reminds me.” Lance started very casually, “The other day I went looking for the box of heat aids for research purposes.”

Keith smiled, amused, “Okay?”

“It was collecting dust. Then I searched the whole cove, high and low, for any kind of sex aid. Found nothing.”

“Okay? You could’ve just asked me.”

“No, things were weird. Anyway, either you’re hiding sex toys from me or you’re using unconventional sex toys which I would want to know in great detail or you’re not using any kind of sex toy at all.”

“Okay.” Keith said, marveling at how much Lance sounded like his old self again.

“So?”

“So what?”

Lance snorted. “Have you played with anything even remotely alpha-sized? Cause I want to know. In elaborate detail.”

Keith cut to the chase, “I can handle you.”

“That wasn’t the question.”

“That’s what you’re getting at.”

“Answer the question, Kitten.”

“No.”

“Why not?”

“I’m shy.” He said smirking.

Lance snorted again, chuckling. “Shy my ass. I think you’re a toy hater and therefore haven’t fucked anything.” He poked him with a finger “You just want to break yourself on my dick.”

Keith clarified, giddy from their playful back and forth. “I’m not a toy hater. I’m a dick enthusiast.”

Lance bit his lip, struggling, “A dick enthusiast?”

“Uh huh”.

“Kitten.”

Keith smiled so winningly that Lance couldn’t hold back his laughter.   

Lance was going to try and slow thing down. Keith was going to do everything in his power to sabotage him.

“Kitten.” Lance said again, a bit of worry creeping into his good humor.

“We’ll see what happens.” He couldn’t repress his slow evil smile.

Lance shook his head, huffing softly to himself and kissed him.

Keith loved his alpha so much.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed the chapter! :)


	5. Hello (Epilogue)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Final chapter/epilogue to Who We Are. Keith and Lance have sex and reconnect along the way. Light-hearted silliness and love, ensues.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: Explicit sex. Fictional character (Keith) doing stupid things around sex. Please enjoy him being a randy idiot over his significant other. Don’t be him in the real world. :)

At first, Keith was sure that he was going to spend the next few quintants testing Lance’s willpower up until his alpha lost it and had his way with him just the way Keith wanted. Keith was incorrect. Lance wasn’t budging on the sex thing despite Keith insisting that he was beyond ready. They were going to hold off until they managed to carve out the time for all-the-way sex.

Not that Lance was trying to resist Keith because the very tick that Keith tried to shamelessly tease, Lance turned it around on him and doubled down such that _Keith_ ended up hot and desperate.

“Lance.” He pleaded.

He could feel the weight and size of Lance’s cock as he grinded into the crevice of his ass from behind, on their sides. He shivered as his alpha’s hands roamed, liberally touching all the secret parts of Keith, leaving him breathless and desperately needy.

“The castleship is staying in the sector for three movements. Shiro’s happy to take the kids this restive.” Lance spoke softly in his ear as he dipped inside the supple heat of Keith’s folds. “We can put all those liners on our bed to good use.”

Keith squeezed his thighs, trapping his alpha’s hand and bit his lip as his hips were rocked by Lance’s thrusts. He squirmed when the hand teasing his birthing slit reached further past, fingers pressing and rubbing at his slicked rim.

Lance sighed, “I miss your scent. You have the sweetest omega pheromone, like honey and baked bread.”

“Shut up.” Keith hissed. “Why are you making me wait. Just fuck me!” When he tried to arch his ass back, Lance followed his movement, sinking his fingers inside and spreading them as he twisted.

“I don’t wanna rush.” Lance reasoned. “I wanna spend the whole restive banging that sweet honeypot of yours, Kitten. Just three more quintants.”

On one hand, a whole restive getting reacquainted sounded fantastic. On the other hand, he wanted his alpha _now_. “That’s three quintants too long.” Keith growled through gritted teeth and flung his head back, unable to hold still from all the teasing. He shuddered when Lance pressed kisses that felt firelit on his newly exposed neck.

“You waited two decaphoebs. What’s a few more quintants?”

“No, Lance.” Keith was enraged horny. “I wasn’t waiting for two decaphoebs, I _shut down_ for two decaphoebs. Come _on_ , it’s at least another varga before the kids-- what are you doing??”

Noooo! Now he was infuriated because Lance had tensed at his words and was pulling away. He felt him sit up so Keith shot up too, ready to ramp up his demands. Instead, he found himself scooped into Lance’s arms so he sat sideways in between Lance’s loosely crossed-legged position.   

Lance buried his face in the crook of Keith’s shoulder and neck. His scent seemed to gain some acridness as if he were anxious or stressed.

“Lance...” Keith huffed, this was not the direction he was hoping for.

Several long ticks passed before Lance responded softly, “I’m sorry things were so hard for you, Kitten”

Shit, Keith wasn’t looking to unpack emotional baggage right now. He wanted dick, dammit. Exasperated, Keith said, “I didn’t mean- I’m fine now. I just want- nghh!”

Lance had wrapped his arm around his waist, pulling him closer still. He firmly pinched his nipple as he wriggled two fingers into his slit, flickering his clit with the pad of his fingertips. Lance nipped at his scent gland.

“ _Lance. Fuck._ ” Keith wheezed, twisting to swing his arms over Lance’s neck and hanging on tight.

The insistent sucking on Keith’s neck sent flaring waves of heat throughout his body, leaving all of his erogenous zones erect and achingly sensitive to his alpha’s touch.

Forget dick just keep doing that and Keith was going to completely lose it. He couldn’t acclimate because the mouth latched to his neck made everything go away other than the gratifying thought that he was his alpha’s omega. Keith was riding high on that primal uncomplicated pleasure; his inner entrance eagerly slicked the path for his alpha to stake his claim.

Keith twisted his hips to the side, curling into his bondmate. He couldn’t get away from the fingers on his clit that knew exactly how to touch him. Keith swallowed down the high pitched whimper that tried to escape as Lance eased off his scent gland. His alpha pressed a kiss there as he repositioned, and drew the patch of skin right back into the sucking pressure of his mouth.

“Oh.. _oh_..”

The feedback loop from mating/scent gland to his pinched nipple to his pussy was working for him. Keith’s hips jerked, his orgasm pulling low and satisfied groans from deep inside.

He was putty in Lance’s hands as he moved him so Keith was between his spread thighs, chest to chest. Keith wrapped his legs loosely around his waist and licked his lips, still shaking as he watched Lance fist his cock. They gently bumped heads as they leaned in together, hot faces and half-lidded gaze trained on Lance jerking off.

His big alpha dick was an angry red at the tip. The whole size and girth of it eclipsed Keith’s own dick. Keith wanted him to tear him up. Do with him what he wanted. He glanced up, fascinated by the red of his bondmate’s cheeks and his singular focus. He looked down again, feeling a hot chill go through him as he watched Lance’s body tense.

“I’m there.” Lance whispered tersely. The way they were sitting meant his come might possibly land on Keith’s face and chest.

“Come on me, alpha.” Keith whispered back.

His bondmate’s hips rocked up roughly. Keith was expecting it but startled anyway, wincing reflexively when ejaculate landed on his lips and cheek. He recovered quickly, eyes trained on Lance as he loved to watch him fall apart. He seemed bigger and broader from up close. Overwhelmed as his hand slowed then dropped to the side.

Keith wrapped his arms around his neck and kissed him, plundering his mouth when his lips parted, tasting both his alpha and his jizz. Keith groaned.

Louder still when Lance scooped his arms under Keith’s knees and planted his hands on his ass, forcing Keith’s legs to spread as he pulled him close. The underside of his knees slotted over the inside of Lance’s elbows. Lance leaned forward so Keith was tipped back slightly in his arms, his thighs and therefore slicked ass and slit bared and flush on Lance’s spent cock.

Lance withdrew from the kiss to lock eyes with Keith and promise, “I’m gonna fuck you.”

Another hot thrill roiled through Keith’s body.

“I just don’t want to rush. “ Lance tried to persuade. “I want the time to abbrevi- ugh - I mean - appreciate it.” He slowed down. “I want to fuck you and keep fucking you and now’s not good. We got the kids and you got your post to go to. Just three more quintants, Kitten.”

Keith stared.

“I’ll make it worth the wait?” Lance smiled, wiping the remaining come from Keith’s cheek and glancing down at the mess left on his chest, a flicker of hot possessiveness in his gaze.

Lance had a good point. Three quintants really was nothing. Keith was just not going to admit it, nor was he going to admit that he was pouting.

“Kitten.”

“What?” He asked, petulantly.

Lance laughed and slid his arms out from under Keith’s legs to wrap him up in a bodily hug.

“First sun’s out and Shiro’s gonna be waking up any tick now. I’m gonna go get ready.”

Keith scooted away from his lap and dropped back on the bed swing, arms flung out above his head. Lance climbed right on top of him so he was nose to nose and grinned.

He was so annoying. Keith huffed, trying not to look at him because his good humor was infectious and Keith wanted to feel sorry for himself. He looked anywhere but Lance which was challenging as he was taking up most of his line of sight.

It did not last long. Keith was always drawn to his alpha. Their eyes met. Keith did his best to look unhappy but a tiny smile was forming, unbidden.

“Kiiiiitten.” Lance purred, low and teasing.

“I don’t like you.” Keith huffed.

“Feeling’s mutual.”

Keith gave up. He grinned.

Lance landed an adoring kiss on his lips then had the gall to smack a loud smoochy kiss on one of his nipples then the other in quick succession.

“Get the fuck off me.” Keith laughed but Lance was already rolling away.

He heard a sudden hiss and a gasped, “Shit!”

Keith shot up, reaching for Lance, worried. “What is it?”

Lance swatted his hands away as he babbled, “Cramp. Legs in and out. I’m messed up already - how am I supposed to fuck you - I need to stitch - _stretch_ \- I need to make breakfast - I need the chair - Rueditas!”

The wheelchair activated, rolling towards him from where it had been stored.

“You don’t have to worry about-”

“Yes, I do.” Lance materialized the wheelchair’s transfer board and expertly used his upper body strength to shimmy from the bedswing to the chair. Walking remained challenging for him as was the associated balance and subsequent pain of the effort.

“No you don’t-”

“Shit, Clara’s got an early enrichment today.”

“Lance.” Keith tried to get his attention. “Lance... hello?”

Apparently he was just talking to himself because Lance paid him no mind as he wheeled towards the bathroom.  He slammed the bathroom door shut leaving Keith alone in their bedcove.

“Uh, okay.” Keith said to the empty cove, amused.

\---

Next quintant, Keith was surely going to kill Lance. His alpha teased him at night and then again at first sun, sinking fingers inside Keith and stretching him out and then _not_ fucking him.

Keith tried to catch his breath after another (dick-free) climax and clenched his hands into fists as he glowered down at Lance.  

“Fuck you!”

Lance smiled as he caught his own breath. His hair was sweaty and still messy from sleep. He stuck an arm behind his head and ran a hand down one of the thighs straddling his waist.

“Kitten.” He began reasonably, “I thought we agreed to this restive?”

“No, you agreed with yourself, I said nothing.”

Lance petted his thigh as he called him out, “Isn’t that how you agree when you’re not happy about agreeing?”

Keith’s eyes narrowed.

“See? There’s your I-agree-glare pout.”

“I don’t pout!” Keith pouted.

Lance smirked, “Sure, okay.” He swept some of Keith’s hair behind his ear. “Two more quintants. I’m prepping you for it, that’s all.”

“I don’t need any _prep_ .” Keith spat out that last word as if it had insulted his character and hurt his children. “I had a whole baby the size of your giant fucking head come out from me without any _prep_.”

Lance’s lips trembled the tiniest bit but otherwise he kept good control of his physical response. He cleared his throat and argued, “But…”

Keith’s eyes narrowed.

“But that was through your birthing path.”

“Surprise, you fuck, it’s from the same pussy source.” Keith snarked.

Lance breathed another beat or two, his lips trembling strongly for one or two dangerous ticks. He began, carefully, “But that’s a different opening…” And at the risk of being neutered, Lance continued, “And I gotta get through anally which-”

Keith grabbed a pillow and shoved it over Lance’s face.

His alpha did absolutely nothing to try to save himself; merely shifted so he could slide his hands down Keith’s sides. Infuriating! Infuriating because, before the mission, Keith would not have held back and would’ve gotten close to suffocating him. Post-mission, he was worried and careful with Lance which Lance was obviously taking advantage of that fact.

Keith should simply stay mad and keep suffocating him.

Two ticks passed before the worry began to churn inside. What if Lance passed out and Keith accidentally killed him? He nervously yanked the pillow away, searching for any hint of pain on Lance’s face.

Lance eyed him back, smiling. His hands settled on Keith’s ass where he dug his fingers in and gripped his posterior cheeks tight. Keith felt him shift his hips so his dick rubbed against his in a delicious over-stimulated slide.

“You’re right though.” Lance empathized. “You should be stretched out, getting it from your alpha as much as you want.”

Keith held still, fighting down very hard any physical trace of how much he enjoyed his alpha’s words. No trickling, no dick twitching, no hungry desperate look, no nothing - he wasn’t going to reward Lance for cockblocking. Except he couldn’t stop a blush of heat from creeping over his cheeks and ears.

Lance was eyeing him like he wanted to eat him up.

Keith wanted _badly_ to be eaten up. His dick felt so good pressed against his pelvis. It would be so good claiming him inside, filling him up, thrusting until he was helplessly spasming around it.

He rolled off of Lance with a groan and glared up at the ceiling, arms flung above his head. Woe was he.

“Two quintants.” Lance promised.

Keith kept staring at nothing while Lance slowly slid off the bed swing then grabbed hold of his quad-cane and headed for the bathroom.

\---

Keith eventually got ready for the quintant too.

He ate breakfast with his family, kissed his children and watched Lance board their transport so he could drop the kids off personally at the Wellspring.

This meant Keith had maybe 20 to 30 doboshes before Lance returned because anywhere Lance went he had to stop and chat.

It was enough time to set up some psychological torment because Lance should at least suffer as much as Keith during this long dry countdown to restive.

Keith was going to get one of his heat aids and ride that thing like he would Lance’s cock and leave it soaked on their bed where his alpha would see it. One, that would be proof that he can handle an alpha sized dick and two, it would elicit torment over the knowledge that he recently fucked an alpha-sized dick (though artificial) and it wasn’t Lance.

He scrambled for their bathroom.

The box was where he had last left it, untouched, on the top bathroom linen shelf, behind the towels. He unlocked it and pulled out his prize, heading straight for Lance’s side of the bedswing. He was a man on a mission. Keith dropped down on his back and shimmied out of his pants. He hugged his bondmate’s pillow, keeping it close to his nose and wrapped his hand around his cock.

Lance had been spooning Keith last night when he had flipped around so he was ass to face with Keith. He pushed Keith’s top thigh up so Keith would keep it hanging in the air as he spread Keith’s ass with his thumb and lapped at his puckered entrance.

It ended with Keith nearly crushing him with his thighs as Lance flickered at his clit and pumped the fingers he had inside his inner entrance.

Slick was beginning to trickle at the memory. Keith wasted no time; he sat up on his knees and got the heat aid under him. He tried to shove it in but he wasn’t slick enough for that to go well. He bit his lip in frustration. He thought of how Lance had surprised him with lubricant a few times so he scrambled over to the nightstand and sought out the lube.

Found it.

He lubed that sucker up and tried again. When Keith was on top of the toy again he couldn’t bear down as easily as he had thought. He kept clenching tight, unable to fully relax. It felt so good though, teasing him at his entrance.

Fuck it.

He took several deep breaths and on an exhale, stubbornly sank down, forcing it all the way inside.

Fuck. Not the good kind ‘fuck’.

_Fuck_!

He felt gutted. He realized he was winded suddenly and that high-pitched distressed whimpers were escaping him. _Fuck_. It was too extreme, his legs quaked underneath him and he keened loudly at being impaled to the limit.

At the same time... there was this sliver of good.

He felt so full.

When was the last time he was stretched out like this? Keith groaned and reached out for Lance’s pillow, hugging it to his chest. Breathing in his alpha’s pheromones greatly helped.

His body relaxed some. Each awful shift was marginally less awful. Keith rolled his hips the tiniest bit and groaned. Then breathed. He did it again, the rolling, and again until he was no longer wincing. Until he was doing it because he wanted to. The distressed note to his noises faded. He found himself holding the base, riding the toy in increasing pleasure.

He panted as he twisted his hips and found a rhythm that made him seep. His body inside was winding up -

On the next full downstroke, the toy rapidly swelled (exploded?!) in girth at the base.

SHIT.

Oh shit he forgot it was a heat aid, of course it was going to knot him. He keeled over dropping on his side as his ass was stretched impossibly wide. His inner entrance, which wasn’t puffy or non-stop seeping in heat at the moment, molded semi-dry around the knot that was pushing it open, creating a tight painful vacuum.

“Shit, shit, shit, fuck, fuck.” Keith gasped between tortured mewls.

He tried not to panic. He had to hold still and relax or it would be worse. Okay. Okay. Looking at the clock, he had maybe ten doboshes before Lance got back. Okay. The knot should go down quick if he didn’t try to milk it.

All he had to do was not try to squeeze it rhythmically as if he were trying to ride it. It felt horrible anyway so he wouldn’t.

Except he squeezed the tiniest bit and it was awful…

But once he got started…

He was humping that knot in earnest. Arousal was dulling the pain. His body was responding, trying to tent inside to accommodate the alpha-sized shaft.  

The stretch at the base was still too extreme. The alpha scent surrounding him wasn’t a rut scent and he wasn’t in heat so there wasn’t enough pheromone to keep him doped up and fully dilated inside for the shaft and knot. He wrapped a shaky hand around his dick. He wouldn’t do this again... yet... he kept riding the knot.  Fuck, Lance was going to find him like this.

The lube rattled off the bed.

Whining cries echoed through the bedcove.

His orgasm was dual; his dick dribbling ejaculate as he spasmed inside.

Eventually, the knot went down. It hurt.

And Lance hadn’t arrived yet.

Keith caught his breath and very, very slowly eased the heat aid out from his passageway. He sat up gingerly and tried to compose himself. That was fucking crazy. He forced himself to move and rolled out of bed to clean up in the bathroom, shell shocked.

He stepped blankly into the embellishment which was a part of the bathroom that materialized his three dimensional reflection upon crossing its boundaries.

He looked fucked out and the lower half of his shirt in the back was wet. Keith tore it off and grabbed another then ran his fingers through his hair so he looked a little less wild.

Unfortunately, although his butt looked fine in his reflection. The state of it inside was starting to demand attention. He dampened a small handtowel and very gingerly wiped at his butt. It came away with a tiny streak of bright red blood. Oh he was already paying for his spiteful randiness.  

Maybe the toy had a fine coating of sandpaper he hadn’t known about? His inner entrance wasn’t usually something he was aware of unless he was in heat. Well. He was trying to deny the fact that his ass was now ON FIRE.

He slapped his hands to his face. Oh god. Please don’t be so bad that he had to go to the sanatorium. He did not want to go to the sanatorium. He would not live down facing his medic and confessing that he broke his ass on a sex toy because he couldn’t wait two quintants for alpha dick. Oh no no.

Keith glared at himself, squared his shoulders and buckled down. He was gonna soldier through this shit. He was gonna have one bad quintant but he’ll ignore it and tomorrow will be a lot better and then restive was going to be full of alpha-dick and all kinds of fun. Keith threw on (carefully hobbled into) a pair of underwear and pants and went back out to the bedcove.

He slapped the toy off the bed and shoved it back into storage. What a terrible idea that was. What the fuck had he been thinking.

He heard the quiet hiss of the transport docking, at last. Keith ignored his body and marched out.

“Shit, Kitten, sorry, sorry, I lost track of time, I know you hate being late-” Lance started sheepishly as he hurried off the transport.

Ain’t no one got time for that.

“Good tidings, Lance.” Keith interrupted, maybe a little too loud and a smidge too intense for a formal farewell. Lance raised an eyebrow.

“Good tidings? Are you okay?”

He had to act normal. “Yeah. Why wouldn’t I be?” Oh he was supposed to be angry about him being late. “And fuck you!” Then kissed him goodbye the way he would when he wasn’t angry and then stomped down any pleading looks or whimpers. He stepped into the transport before any other questions could be asked, immediately materializing the hull.

Lance’s other eyebrow went up as the transport backed out of the bay.

\---

Someway, somehow, Keith powered through the quintant. Walked almost normal and sat with only the slightest hesitation.

He sat very apprehensively in the transport on his way back home. His lower half was still burning which he now had to pretend it wasn’t in front of his alpha whose favorite past time was watching Keith. He knew Lance was suspicious as he had pinged him at lunch and at the socialcaps giving him probing looks and asking leading questions.  

He would ignore it, he had two quintants to heal and he was gonna be fine for the restive. He was going to be _fine_.

He arrived at the homecove.

“Hi mami!”

“Hey baby.” Keith smiled at his daughter who ran up to him for a hug so she could escape Lance. He hugged her and picked up Shiro, peppering him with kisses just like normal.

“Mami, I got a talking stone!” Shiro informed him and tried to shove a garden stone into Keith’s face.

“Hi Kitten.” Lance called from the kitchen. “Back here, Clara.” He had sequestered her at the kitchen table so she would do her assignments.

Clara clung to Keith as she yelled back, “Papi, mami looks really tired. Let me help him get settled in!”

“I think he’s got that down, princesa. Come finish your assignments please.”

She walked back to the kitchen followed by Keith. Lance was wrapping up dinner.

“Papi, is it so bad if I spend some time with mami? I want to know what his quintant was like. There is plenty of time for the assignments after that.” She said very reasonably.

Lance gave her a dry look and looked up at Keith. “How was your quintant?”

Keith smirked as he very carefully set Shiro down on the counter. “It was fine.”

“His quintant was fine. Get that first assignment done, princesa.”

She groaned as she reluctantly returned to her spot at the table. “Why do I have to do it right now? It’s not due until after restive!”

“You wanna tell mami why you now have to work on your assignments right after Wellspring? Or why I’m checking with your Wellspring minder every quintant?”

Keith already knew but she didn’t know that. She blushed and busied herself with her tablet, saying in a tiny voice, “No.”

“Then get to it.”

Shiro had been playing with his stone as he watched the back and forth. When it was over he shoved the stone under Keith’s nose again. “Mami, look!” It was a warbling stone he had collected from the Wellspring garden. “It talks!” He rubbed the stone which emitted the warbling chattering sound that it was known for.

Keith smiled at his son, “Oh wow!” And showed interest in the stone as Shiro babble-narrated his synopsis of it.

Keith could _do_ this.

Dinner was made. Clara finished her first assignment. Shiro was settled in his booster seat.

Lance held on to the counter for some support as he circled past Keith who was rounding up the plates for dinner.

His alpha landed a playful swat to Keith’s ass.

Meaning a nuclear missile detonated inside his ass.

Keith squealed loud enough to make Clara and Shiro jump in surprise. He had dropped the stack of plates and grabbed hold of the counter.

“Mami?”

Lance’s eyes narrowed. “You okay, Kitten?” He asked lightly.

Keith nodded as a silent piercing scream echoed in his head. “I forgot...” He managed not to weep. “That I have some paperwork to finish for my post, I’ll go do that now.”

Lance didn’t try and stop him or question him any further which was a huge relief. He mentally apologized to his kids for not spending time with them and fled - slowly - for his bedcove where he curled up in the bedswing on his stomach and placed his tablet next to himself in case Lance came in.

Maybe he really needed to get something for his ripped up ass. Reluctantly, he picked up the tablet and shopped the wellbeing inventories for some treatments that might help him.

He would pick something up tomorrow in person and avoid any questions from Lance. In the meantime, he was going to try to sleep it off.

\---

It was dark when a hand rubbed his back gently.

Keith shifted then held very still and cracked his eyes open. Lance was standing by the bedcove, hands on his cane and smiling warmly at him.

“Hey.” He said quietly, “I drew you a bath.”

That was weird, Keith wasn’t a big bath person. “Oh, okay.” He rubbed the sleep off his eyes.

His alpha kept looking at him expectantly until Keith realized that, right, he was supposed to get IN the bath. He braced himself for itching burning pain and gingerly sat up then smiled through his silent scream. Everything was _great_. Lance kept smiling at him in his usual way. Fantastic. All he had to do was make it to the bathroom on two legs. Crawling would raise suspicions.

Longest walk of his life but he made it.

He entered the bathroom and shut the door behind himself to evaluate in private what kind of fresh hell was up next. Bath shouldn’t hurt his ass, right?

The door to the bath area was shut. Next to it, the piping around a control panel was lit a glowing blue indicating the basin inside was filled with water. Keith tapped the door which slid open, revealing the sunken bathing alcove inside. The cove was comma shaped; stairs on the narrow curved end led down to the circular copper-like basin which was about the size and depth of three upright wine barrels pushed together.

Keith grabbed the banister and gingerly went down a step down to inspect the bath. The basin was partly filled with water and steaming. It seemed innocuous enough. Keith pulled his clothes off and took the remaining steep steps down to the water where he carefully sat on the built in bench.

The water line lapped right below his chest. It was nicely heated and had a foamy film to it so Lance must’ve added something to the water. It was actually heavenly. Keith sighed and relaxed, propping his feet on the bench across from him. He idly thought of inviting Lance to join him but it was hard to hear the rest of the house from there and one or the other always stayed within earshot of the kids.

He soaked for some time, dozing off.

By the time he woke, his butt was feeling better. However when he squeezed experimentally he hissed. Yeah, his inner opening still felt like it had a grenade explode just inside it. He swallowed nervously.

Time to get out. No amount of soaking was gonna help him at this stage.

Keith gingerly stood up and re-entered the bathroom proper where he threw on a pair of shorts and an old shirt he grabbed from storage. He tip-toed out of the room, hoping Lance was asleep so he wouldn’t question his unusual lack of dicking demands.

No such luck, Lance was lounging on the chair by their bedswing, tablet in hand, waiting up.

“That was great. Thanks.” said Keith and tried not to freak out when Lance offered his hand. Usually Keith would straddle him before bed and exchange barbs or banter between kisses.

He hoped his smirk looked heartfelt as he took Lance’s hand and let him pull him close. He straddled him and tried not to break out in a hot sweat.

“Glad you liked it.” Lance replied. His scent betrayed a growing arousal. Nooo.

His alpha gave him a kiss as he ran his hands down his freshly clean body. He pulled his shorts down enough to bunch just under Keith’s ass. Noooooo.

Don’t tense up.

Keith hid his dread behind a beaming smile. Lance beamed right back as he petted his ass. He trailed his fingers up the swell of his cheeks, locking eyes as his nails gently raked. Keith was not going to flinch. He helped defeat an evil empire, he can get through a little broke ass.

“We’re two varga away from one more quintant.” Said Lance.

Keith swallowed. “Yeah.” His smirk might’ve been slightly delayed.

Lance smirked right back. His alpha kept his eyes fixed on him as he reached for the nightstand. Apparently, lube was in order tonight. God, what if the lube stung the rips in his inner entrance. His body stiffened in fright. Would he maybe get an infection? His eyes widened in horror.

Lance’s own eyes narrowed suspiciously but Keith recovered quickly enough to grin.

So Lance grinned back. His arms went back around Keith. He could hear him squirt a big dollop of the lubricant on his hand. The big moment came where he pressed two fingers on Keith’s anal entrance and pushed in, going for his inner slit.

It took everything not to wince pre-emptively and leap out of his arms. As soon as the fire hit he was gonna have to scream, confess and beg for medical attention.

Except. Lance rubbed at his inner opening instead of pushing through it.

That wasn’t lubricant.

It cooled down his insides, anywhere it touched, giving him numb butt for a few blissful ticks as it healed the tears inside. His body sagged in relief. His eyes rolled up as he humped Lance’s fingers when he breached his inner opening.

He dared to look at his alpha again.

Lance’s eyes were lit up in unholy amusement.

“So..” he said casually.

“Shut up.”

“You ripped yourself a new one and you’ve been on fire ...I’m thinking the whole time you were at your post?”

Keith wasn’t going to blush, he closed his eyes.

“And still, you were gonna let me fuck that very raw, very grated ass of yours.”

“Shut _up_.” Keith slurred. That stuff in his ass was truly some kind of miracle jelly brought down by the gods to cure all that was wrong in the universe.

“I found the heat aid, Kitten.”

“Shut up.”

“You should probably clean it after use and maybe work yourself up to a knot if you want knot play when you’re not in heat.”

“Shut _up_.” Oh, Lance’s fingers were just delightful.

“Never seen you jump that hard or that loud or that high over a slap on the ass.”

“Shut up.”

“What am I supposed to do with you?”

Now that the initial relief was over, Keith became more aware of Lance. He wasn’t doing anything about it but he was tenting his pajamas and his pheromone scent was strong. _Virile_ whispered the primordial part of Keith’s brain.

Keith jerked his head in a quick motion to get his bangs out of his way and settled a thoughtful gaze on Lance.  There was a tiny knowing smirk on his lips and warmth in his eyes when he said to his alpha, “You’re gonna fuck me.”

Lance’s breath hitched. “Yeah.” he promised.

Keith smiled. Then he thought on the situation.

The moment was absurd. Keith was actually still humping his alpha’s fingers in relief. It was an extremely inappropriate time to start cracking up.

He started giggling. There may still have been a sore spot or two. “Ow.” He laughed.

Lance’s eyebrows went sky-high again.

Keith laughed harder.

Lance rolled his eyes and shook his head but he couldn’t help grinning at Keith losing it.

“You are a weirdo.” His alpha said. “And there’s leftovers in the kitchen. I’m assuming your broke ass is hungry.”

Keith hugged his bondmate as his body shook with laughter. “Thanks.” he howled.

\---

Restive arrived.

At first sun, Lance stepped out of the bathroom and made his way back to the bedswing. He set his walking cane aside and sat by Keith.

“Ahh.” He said, smacking his lips, “I’m minty fresh!” Then narrowed his eyes at Keith who was swing hogging, “Give me my pillow back!”

“Bite me.”

Lance stared trying to determine if Keith meant bite me as in ‘fuck-off’ or bite me as in ‘bite me cause I’m turned on by you biting me’.

Keith smiled, chesire-cat like.

“You-” was as far as Lance got before Keith leapt up and tackled him so they both went down on the swing, lips locked.

They made out like teenagers.

They just couldn’t keep their hands off each other as they prepared for restive.

A chaste kiss to the cheek or lips each time they crossed each other when getting (or nagging) the kids ready.

Lance’s hand lingered over Keith’s at the kitchen table while he made their kids nearly choke on their breakfast with laughter.

Later, Keith ran his fingers through Lance’s hair when he was back in his wheelchair coolly debating Clara over the merits of her keeping her bathroom clean and gear-free when no one but her used it.

When Keith was happy it seemed to catch-on for the rest of the household. The kids were quick to smile and kept a good mood. Lance was even more at ease - which he was always relaxed but worries and pain and therapies took their toll sometimes.

By the time the family transport undocked to make way for incoming, the household was humming along. The kids were packed and anxious to go because Shiro promised a restive by the sea-side where he had bought tickets to a racing fair. He had reserved a planet-side apartment for the occasion.

The incoming transport alert pinged, Keith caught Lance’s eye in shared excited anticipation and couldn’t seem to break eye contact as the transport docked. This movement’s restive was four quintants long. They had the homecove to themselves for most of it. Keith shivered at Lance’s soft crooked smile and forced himself to look away.

The hull de-materialized revealing Shiro and Pidge who tagged along. They took one step into the homecove and looked up at Keith and Lance in shock. Shiro’s eyebrows flew up and Pidge graced them with a shit-eating grin. That last exchange between Keith and Lance sparked a strong pheromonal response from them both.

The kids couldn’t scent pheromones yet but their friends sure could.

“Oh wow. Okay.” Shiro managed to say to their major embarrassment. Fortunately the kids tried to tackle him.

“Uncle Shiro!”

“Clara and Tatertot!” Shiro declared. “I get to see you again!” He gave Clara a hug, then turned to their son, “Come here!” He swung his namesake up in his arms and chatted away with him. Clara hurried to hug Pidge and lead her out the back to show off her latest outdoor project hoping Lance wouldn’t notice.

“NOPE. You can show her later, princesa.” Lance called after her and studiously avoided looking directly at Pidge.

“Papi!” Clara protested.

“Uncle Shiro and Aunt Pidge came here to pick you up - not spend half the quintant on Clara’s Projects tour. You can show them next time.”

“That’s not fair!” She complained.

He sighed. “Come here, please. I’m gonna explain why it’s fair.”

Keith also avoided Pidge’s mocking grin and concentrated on his alpha and his daughter. He watched Clara cross her arms and stomp over, ready to counter-argue anything her dad dished out. Lance wheeled back before she could reach him.

“I said come here please.”

She tried again and he backed away again.

“Princesa, just come here?”

“Papi!!” She tried not to laugh as she kept going towards him and he kept backing away looking disappointed at her.

He shook his head, “Princesa.”

“You keep running away!”

“I don’t think so??” He said as he backed towards her bedcove.

“You’re just trying to get me to my bedcove!” She laughed.

“What, so you can get your bag and have a great time at the Sandspring with your brother, Uncle Shiro and Aunt Pidge? Wouldn’t dream of it.”

She rolled her eyes, exasperated, “Papi...” But then she went in to her bedcove with a smile, too amused to care about her earlier protests.

“Thank you, Princesa.” Lance said as she went by, he then wheeled back into the hearth where Shiro was waiting for him. He handed him a wrapped package.

“Your order.” He said.

“Thanks.” He muttered and continued not looking at Pidge.

“Sooooooooo.” Pidge said because at heart she was a shitty troll. “Any plans this restive?”

They were both beet red. This wasn’t as bad as Hunk catching them on a kitchen table back at the castleship but still not great.

“Nope.” Said Lance.

“Let’s hurry along children.” Shiro kindly stayed mum on the scent and busied himself with shepherding their kids into the transport. At last everyone got settled in.

Keith’s fingers dug into Lance’s shoulders as he waved at his kids and endured Pidge and Shiro’s knowing looks.

“Try not to chafe.” Pidge smirked.

“Why would they chafe?” asked Clara. She eyed them suspiciously.

_God_.

Even Shiro was smirking a little bit. He teased them too, saying, “Behave.” just as the hull materialized.

The transport undocked and silently sped away.

Keith slapped his hands to his face. That was humiliating.

“Was our scent that bad?” asked Lance.

“I guess so.” Keith sighed and crossed his arms, eyeing his alpha. “What’s in the package?”

“Therapy stuff.”

“Ah.”

Alone at last.

Now things were growing awkward. They both felt a lot self-conscious over starting anything and they both knew it which caused them both to grin a little sheepishly.

A kind of quiet playfulness awakened inside Keith. He had kept this side of himself under wraps for so long. Oddly, he was feeling a whole lot like he did when they started their sexual relationship - that awkward surprise and eagerness he had once he realized that sex could just be _fun_.

Before Lance and after he was kicked out of the Garrison, he shared two heats and had sex outside of it a few times. The sex was mostly awkward physical release for him while the heats were both with older partners that were in retrospect, self-centered, smirking egos. They were smug over how Keith responded to them in heat as if his biological imperative was about them.

They had annoying words and expectations and worse, they drew out his discomfort because they thought it was hot for him to beg for it. He just wanted to get through it.

They were unlike Lance who blustered his way into sharing a heat with Keith (which he didn’t think Keith would take him seriously? Why would he ask??)

Heat with Lance was different. Lance wasn’t particularly great but he was funny and fun and respected him. He didn’t try to tease him when he was burning up in need, just pushed in and gave it to him. Lance kept talking to him and assessing him like he was a person to worry about and not an omega object to please an alpha ego. He kept trying to make Keith laugh which was not in his make-up yet. He wore him down to smiles and less barbed banter.

Keith got hooked.

He was ready to play.

“So.” He said to his bondmate, “Hi.”

Lance’s eyes gleamed in amusement. “Hi Kitten.”

“I’ve been meaning to tell you something.”

“What’s that?”

“I don’t like your face. It’s stupid.”

Lance remained unperturbed. “You sure? Maybe you should come closer, get a good look.”

“No, thanks. I’ve seen it up close. It’s bad.”

“Oh, okay.”

“Anyway, I’m gonna go take a nap.” He stopped for a beat. “Cause you’re boring”

“I get that.” Lance waved him along. “Go for it.”

Keith started moving towards their bedcove but Lance casually wheeled himself into his path.

“You’re in the way. You do that a lot.”

“Oh, sorry.” said Lance, unrepentantly.

When Keith kept staring at him, Lance continued, “Oh right. Look, you mind going around? This is a real good spot for me, I hate the idea of moving.”

“No problem.” He went around the hall table to get by Lance.

Lance casually rolled back, blocking him again.

“Lance.”

“Hm?”

“You’re in the way.”

“Oh, guess so.”

“Yeah, so.”

“Looks like this might not work. Maybe if I give you a ride to the bedcove?” Lance suggested.

Keith eyed him as if searching for any hint of funny business then shrugged. “Yeah, sounds fine.”

He sat on his lap. Lance didn’t move except for settling his arms tightly around him. They sized each other up.

“Lance.”

“Yeah, we’re not going anywhere.”

“You tricked me.”

“Yeah.”

Keith smiled.

Lance smiled back.

When nothing else happened other than serene smiling, Keith started to laugh.

“What?”

“Nothing.” Keith smiled.

“You laugh at nothing?”

“Yeah.” Keith ran his eyes over Lance’s well defined arms then smoothed his hands over the muscles appreciatively. “You look good.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.”

Lance appeared to preen, “You should kiss me then.”

Keith smirked. “Sure.”

He began to lean into Lance who squeezed his eyes shut tight and pursed his lips so they protruded out, duck-like. It was hard not to crack up as his bondmate kept straining his puckered lips towards him.

God, Keith hadn’t been this kind of silly for so long.

“I really like what you’re doing with your face, it’s a big improvement” He grinned as he watched Lance struggle to keep his lips pursed and not laugh. Lance peeked at him. “Yeah?”

“Yes.”

“Okay.” He kept stretching his puckered lips.

“I got something for you.” Keith rumbled as he fished in his pockets.

“Is it omega dick? I hope it’s omega dick.”

“Better. Keep your eyes closed.” Keith pulled out his prize and uncapped the little container. He waited a beat then asked, “You ready for it?”

Lance nodded then nearly died when Keith applied a glob of their kids’ lip balm on his lips.

“Keeps your lips moist.” Keith purred. “You like that?”  

His bondmate responded by wrapping his lips on his finger and sucking him in. Lance bobbed his head, mouth hot and wet around Keith’s finger as he emulated the thrusts of sex. The giggles for Keith were gone in an instant. He squirmed as Lance ran his hand between his thighs rubbing him at the apex over his pants.

Lance released his finger to say roughly, “Man, am I gonna fuck you.”

Keith felt his body flush hot in response. He crushed their lips together, moaning into the kiss as their tongues curled and twisted. He could feel Lance’s dick stirring to life against his thigh. Keith wanted to be fucked.

He pulled away for a harsh breath and asked because he always worried for his alpha, “Are you are comfortable?”

Lance was flushed too. He licked his lips and snorted. “Comfortable? No, I’m horny. I’m desperately horny. Dick hard.”

Keith smirked and cupped the evidence in Lance’s pants. “I can take care of that.”

“ _Please_.”

Lance touched him everywhere as he shed his shorts and t-shirt, making it difficult to concentrate. Keith slid off his lap and went down on his knees in front of him, reaching for the hem of his alpha’s pants. Lance lifted himself up to assist; his cock sprang up once freed from its confines.

Keith couldn’t wait to wrap his mouth around his alpha’s cock. He wanted to feel that spongy firmness pushing past his gag reflex. He wedged himself closer, just as he leaned forward Lance ran his fingers down his cheek for his attention.  

“Can you get your thighs on my shoulders?” Lance said when Keith looked up. “I wanna suck you back?”

Keith eyed how he was seated. Yes. He stood up and leaned into his alpha from his side, bracing his arms and hands on Lance’s thighs and using his upper body strength to hoist himself up as if doing a cartwheel. His upper body was suddenly held tight as Lance wheeled the short distance to the arm of their couch so it was in front of Keith.

He secured the wheelchair arms then let Keith’s body slide down some. Keith had to scrabble for the couch in front of him, like a _seal_ , until his legs were eased down, and his knees were bent and settled onto the wheelchair arms.  

Keith blushed; his back was strongly arched and he was in quite the compromising position, on all fours, ass to Lance’s face.

“I can’t actually reach-”

Lance held him by the waist and burrowed into his folds, lapping at his clit.

Keith gasped, not expecting it, his body jerked involuntarily causing his knees to slip off the chair arm. His lower half hung in place solely from Lance’s grip on his waist as he fumbled to get his legs situated.  His body slicked up immediately upon his alpha’s spirited dive into his slit.

He thought Lance was going to leave his folds dripping with spit from how thoroughly he was licking. Keith crossed his arms over the couch arm and melted under the onslaught. He keened as the licking turned to deft twists and presses of tongue over his clit.

He was getting sloppy wet inside. A trickle of slick escaped, he felt it running down his thigh and moaned, tortured, when Lance caught the drip with his tongue and followed the wet trail back up to the source.  He felt Lance reposition his arms then dig his fingers into his ass cheeks, spreading him with his thumbs.

Lance pushed into his wet puckered entrance as far as he could.

“Fucking fuck meee.” Sobbed Keith as Lance bobbed into his channel.

He could feel Lance’s own moans. His body shook as Lance kept incessantly thrusting as deeply as he could. His alpha carefully reached around and wrapped his hand around Keith’s dick, jerking him off using fast short strokes. Keith ached so bad. He felt hollow where Lance couldn’t reach. He felt so helplessly aroused. His eyes fluttered open, unseeing as he pushed back, feeling unbearable pleasure each time his hole squeezed tight around the muscular tongue pushing through.

“Lance, fuck me.” He begged. “Fuck me.” He wasn’t angry-frustrated anymore. He was way passed that; he had surrendered to it. He just wanted his alpha to take him.

Lance slid his hands back to his waist and pulled away to bite and suck at the flesh of his ass. Keith panted, regaining his breath as he felt Lance release the arms of the wheelchair so they dropped out of the way.

“Sit up, baby. Would you face me?” Lance helped him steady his feet on the ground and push himself upright. Keith shakily slung a leg over his lap to dismount and turned around, then climbed back onto his lap, bracing his heels on the seat of the wheelchair. He rubbed at the corner of his eye, resting an arm on his bondmate’s shoulder as he watched him pull out the package Shiro had given him from a storage pocket on the chair.

“I got us something.” Lance said quietly. He licked his lips and cleared his throat as he unwrapped the package, explaining, “So I read that lots of omega-male alpha couples have the size problem. Doctors usually recommend getting dilater devices.” There was a smile in Lance’s voice and a brief teasing glance as he said, “Rather than trying to break your ass on a heat aid.”

Keith had bigger fish to fry, “Why did _Shiro_ hand you a sex toy?!”

“Cause the space mall had one! I got Shiro to pick it up for me. It’s basically an inflatable dildo.” He waved the little wireless remote that he pulled out along with a small bottle of lubricant.  He hesitated at the wide-eyed horrified look that Keith was giving him. “Kitten? We should at least try it?”

That was not what Keith was worried about. “Lance, are you fucking kidding me?!” He burst, “Shiro’s like my brother!!”

“So??”

“You had him buy me a dildo!” He said, scandalized.

“Uh, I think he knows we have sex.”

“Oh my god.” Keith groaned, hiding his face in his hands.

“What?!”

“Just…” Keith waved despairingly having no more words.

“ _Anyway_.” said Lance.

Keith felt Lance moving his arms and dropped his hands to watch, mentally running away from the Shiro thing. His alpha stuck the toy in the drawstring sanitizer bag it came with and gave it a few strokes.

“How big does it get?” Keith asked, curious.

His bondmate tinkered with the remote, making it grow in length and girth. It had two sizes that were much bigger than Lance.

“Shit.”

Lance laughed and shrunk it back down. His gaze turned simmering as he said, “It would be really fucking hot seeing you fuck this toy, Kitten. Then I’ll fuck you.”

A renewed surge of heat bloomed inside Keith. He motioned for it,“Yeah, give me.”

He watched Lance smother the toy with lubricant then grabbed it by the slippery base. He rearranged himself so he could put one foot on the floor between Lance’s legs and a bent knee on Lance’s thigh. He propped a hand on Lance’s shoulder. His bondmate wrapped his arms around him, running soft eyes over his body as Keith twisted back slightly to nudge the toy at his entrance.

He pushed the modest toy inside, feeling it’s lubed shaft spread him apart.

It took his breath away. It always felt good to be filled. He let Lance take hold of the base and leaned forward, sticking his nose on Lance’s skin, enjoying his scent.

He could feel Lance breath grow labored. Lance had embedded the toy fully inside and was pushing it in circles.

Keith moaned when the toy grew larger and rolled his hips.

“Hey, it’s like getting my dick through the ages.”

Keith snorted as Lance started a slow steady in and out rhythm.

“So this was before my alpha growth spurt. Thanks for pretending that you felt me during heat, by the way.”

Keith laughed, “I felt it.”

“Uh huh.”

With his bondmate’s scent in his nose and his body so close,  Keith’s body was starting to believe the toy was the real thing. It just wasn’t the right size. “Bigger, alpha.”

He felt Lance’s full body shudder. “Sure, Kitten.” He said, simply. The toy went up in size.

The back and forth slide through the muscles of his rim and inner entrance was lighting up the pleasure centers inside. Keith struggled to stay partly standing then gave up and shakily rearranged himself again so his bent legs were a top his alpha’s thighs.

He arched his back, pushing his ass out for more fucking.

His bondmate kept steadily thrusting the toy.

“Lance.” He whined as his body wound tight. All the slick he was producing caused a squooshing sloshy noise with the thrusts.

“Kitten.” Lance bit his lip as he made the toy bigger still.

Everything was right. Keith stuck his hand over his mound-testes area, fingers on his clit. He was almost there. His body humped back.

He whined piteously when Lance buried the dildo inside him and kept it firmly in place. His pussy tried to squeeze around the shaft of the toy, heightening his awareness of how widely stretched he was around it.  Keith’s body bowed forward; his chest heaved. Breathless creaky moans escaped him.

He felt the back and forth drag of Lance’s knuckles on his belly as he jacked off.

“It feels so good. I’m really close.” He said close to Lance’s ear.

The dildo was gone in one smooth stroke.

“Lance!” said Keith, so frustrated.

He realized Lance was carefully swinging away the leg rest which dematerialized as he planted his feet on the floor.

Lance smiled cheekily at him before he lifted him by his waist. It was impressive and hot that his alpha could bear his weight like that. Keith managed to untuck his legs from under himself and brace his feet on the locked wheels of the chair.

Keith’s mouth went dry. He was being guided onto his bondmate’s cock. His body trembled as he eased down slowly, relying on Lance’s sturdy grip. Then, at last, Lance’s _dick_ was inside him. _Lance’s_ dick was inside him. Lance’s dick was _inside_ him.

He was shaking uncontrollably by the time he bottomed out. Keith couldn’t get any words out. He struggled with getting his legs wrapped around his alpha, digging his heels into the back of the chair. They were intimately close, flat bellies and chests pressed together. His alpha’s arms crossed behind Keith’s back. His strong alpha pheromones made Keith’s head swim and sparked the wet spasms of impaled pussy.

He was closely held and completely wrapped up in his alpha. Their foreheads pressed together. Keith’s body moved with the roll of Lance’s hips.

“Kitten.”

Keith could feel Lance’s soft huffs on his lips and chin.

“Love you.” whispered Lance.

He could feel the flex of his bondmate’s arms as he held him. The roll of hips that transitioned to partial pull outs and deeply driven plunges. His alpha was finally taking him the way he wanted. His alpha dick was big and familiar to his body even after so long.

“I love you.” Lance said.

Keith’s arms were looped tightly over Lance’s shoulders. He dug his fingers in. Keith still couldn’t get any words out or even noises. Something ruinous was happening to his face.

“Love you.” said Lance.

His alpha kept saying it.

“I love you so much.”

He said it hushed, between the breathless thrusts.

“I love you, Kitten.”

Keith squeezed his eyes shut and swallowed.

“I love you so fucking much.” said Lance.

Why did he have to do this?

Any semblance of composure for Keith was shattered. He was stripped raw. Why did his alpha have to treat him so softly? How was he able to convince someone as guarded as Keith that he was treasured and cherished?

“I love you.”  

The words saturated Keith’s senses with life. But it wasn’t just the words. Lance’s feelings had always been in the way he touched him, whether boldly or soft and lingering. The way he looked at him and smiled, simply because Keith existed. All the stupid things he said because he wanted Keith to smile too. He’d even say the things he didn’t want to say because Keith was more important to him than his pride.

Keith desperately wanted to be better person so he could be worthwhile of that love. The insecure boy inside that never belonged looked back out at Lance. He felt his eyes well with tears and his face grow hotter as he asked, “Why? What’s so great about me?”

“Are you kidding?” Lance asked, astonished. His hips had stilled. “You’re _everything_.”

Keith snorted. He felt his alpha nudging his head with his own. He was sure he was trying to make him look up but Keith had jerked his gaze down at his words.

“I’m serious.”

Keith couldn’t respond to that.

“Kitten.” Lance tried again.

Keith bit his lip, refusing to look.

He felt Lance’s hand cup his chin. His bondmate gently tipped his head up, forcing eye contact.

“I’m serious.” His alpha stressed. “You’re my fucking world, Kitten.”

“ _Fucking_ sap.” Keith cried miserably, mouth trembling as he met Lance’s kisses.

“Yeah.” Lance said softly, unrepentantly, “Let’s get bonded.”

“We’re already bonded, asshole.” Keith croaked. He took a deep stuttering breath and dropped his head on Lance’s shoulder.

Lance was the love of his life.

He heard Lance’s wet sniffle and jerked back as he wiped his own eyes.

“Is this our thing now?” He demanded. “Sex and crying? I fucking hate it.”

Lance huffed, wiping his eyes with the back of his hand and then brushed a thumb on Keith’s cheek, swiping his tears away too. “Could be worse.”

Lance shifted his hips.

“Don’t move.” Keith rushed to say, stifling a sudden choked sob.

“Kitten?”

“Don’t. Move.”

“I um.” Lance laughed a little helplessly. “Umm..”

“Don’t move. If you fucking move I’m going to start blubbering and I don’t want to do that. Don’t move.” Keith said stubbornly.

“I need to move…?”

“ _No_.” Keith replied.

He gave him his worst glare and frowned as Lance tensed underneath him, trying not to move. Then his hips jerked, almost like a spasm, rocking Keith.  A loud weepy whimper escaped the tight knot in Keith’s throat.

“Asshole!” He accused.

“Do you want me to stop fucking you?” Lance asked through gritted teeth.

“Fuck you, no!” Keith then moaned, “Ohhh god.” shivering in pleasure as Lance started up again in earnest.

Keith held on and sniffled.

They had been through so much.

“Would you have gone to that mission anyway?” He asked in a fit of vulnerability.

“Baby, yes.”

Keith nodded, taking him at his word. It was the kind of men they were.

Keith burrowed his face in the crook of his alpha’s neck.

“I love you too.” He murmured into his skin.

“You’re mine, Kitten.”

Keith nodded. Hot licks of pleasure crackled out from his center through to his limbs as he was pounded. His alpha’s arms were suddenly pulling him up, halfway off his dick, and slamming him back down. Keith let him do whatever he wanted, riding the high of feeling completely possessed and claimed by his bondmate.

He heard the tell tale soft moans of his alpha.

_Fill me up, alpha._

Lance shot inside. His hips jerked, uncoordinated. He didn’t stop though; he hugged Keith tight by the waist, holding him still and drilled into him the way Keith used to always beg for.

“Ahh fuuuck!” Keith cried out as the short, brutal thrusts reverberated through his body. His mouth hung open as he let loose stuttering squeals matching the bounce. Orgasm struck. It bowled him over and carried him away.

He floated in a daze.

Hands smoothed around his back and he collapsed forward, panting in the aftermath.

Lance panted, too.

“I’m going to need a lot of painkillers.” His alpha groaned.

Keith laughed. His body was virtually humming as a wonderful afterglow began to settle in his bones.

He nuzzled his alpha’s shoulder, utterly satisfied. Lance’s t-shirt was drenched in sweat.

“Can you um.. “ It seemed Lance did a quick mental self-check. “Yeah, I can’t move anymore, can you get off my dick??”

Keith sat up carefully, worried as he asked, “Can you really not move? You didn’t have to do all that, do you want-”

Lance kissed him. “I’ll be fine.” Another kiss. “Also we’re not done. I don’t care if I pay for it.”  One more peck on the lips. “Also get off my dick. Just need your weight off, really.”

Keith lifted up slowly. His alpha’s softening cock slipped out of him. Keith was already getting sore. He was gonna be paying for it too.

He scooped up his shirt off the floor and covered the couch arm with it before he sat, facing Lance.  The mixed fluids inside were seeping out of him. He could also feel how disheveled his hair was. He was sure he looked fucked out.

Lance’s eyes darted down his body and back up. “Hot.” He said, simply.

Keith grinned.

Lance smiled crookedly, “Wish I could show you off to my family. Our family. Mom and dad and my sisters would love you.”

Personally, Keith didn’t think his anti-social unconventional idiocy inspired much love in people but he kept the thought to himself as he smirked. “You want to show me off like this?”

“Ha. No. Naked you is mine. You can wear all the washers when you meet them.”

Keith chuckled and tried not to worry that Lance swapped the word washer for clothes and didn’t notice. It was happening much less.

Lance hesitated as he regarded him. His next words sounded wistful, “I think you would love visiting Cuba too. We have some land in Viñales. It’s in the countryside. Lots of old farms and things.”

Keith smiled warmly.“Yeah?”

“Yep.” Lance wrapped a hand high on Keith’s calf. “I know you always wondered about your mom. Did you want to try and find her?”

He thought about it. “It would be nice…But I have other priorities. Like a stable and safe life for our kids.”

“Mmm. Yeah.” Lance said and left it at that.

Keith’s smile softened because he knew Lance wanted to ask about living in Cuba but did not want to be selfish.

Keith, Lance and their Voltron friends had all agreed they would stick around in this part of the universe at least until the peace accords were officially ratified.  

There was now a date for the signing to occur.

Keith kept smiling. Honestly, this planet was lovely - he owed so much to its people - but location didn’t matter to him much. He always felt like an outsider on Earth but that was a long time ago before Shiro, Lance and Voltron turned his life upside down. So long as he could be with his kids and Lance, he could settle anywhere.

“Would you fuck me as much as I want if we go back to Earth?”

He loved the happy flush on his alpha’s face and how his eyes twinkled merrily. His scar never stood a chance in dulling his bondmate’s shine.

He heard the laugh in Lance’s voice as he said, “Until my dick falls off, Kitten.”

“Great.”

“Great?”

Keith said,“I always thought Earth would be your end game. I would want to get things sorted here - wait for the end of the Wellspring learning cycle for Clara and get the elders situated but other than that…” He reached for Lance’s hand and squeezed. “Other than that, I’d be happy to settle on Earth. If you want.” He grinned.

Lance grinned back. Keith knew Lance was going to be gushing about returning to Cuba for a long time but for now, his response was an understated, “Okay.” His alpha changed the subject, “You are ridiculously heavy for a short stack, I can barely lift you.”

Keith smirked. “Oh, that’s because you’re a wuss.”

“Hey. I’ve been working out.”

“Wuss.”

“Some of us had to learn how to walk again before going on that Balmera-lift regimen.”

“Wuss.”

“You think your alpha’s a wuss?”

“Yeah, you’re a big wuss.”

“That’s not what it sounded like a few ticks ago.”

“That’s because your dick is as big as your wuss factor.”

Lance laughed, “You’re such an asshole.”

He tugged at Keith until Keith slid off the couch and leaned over him, hands on the rematerialized arms of the wheelchair. They were nose to nose.

“I’m just trying to keep you humble.” Keith reasoned.

“Nice. Except in reality you’re just an asshole.”

“Yeah.” He replied smugly.

Lance ran his hands up the back of Keith’s arms.

“I love you, Kitten.”

Keith shivered as he smiled.

“I love you too, Lance.”

They kissed oh so softly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> :D Welp, that’s it! I really hope you enjoyed this installment in the overall series! I’d love to hear from you if you did. For anyone that’s a little shy or maybe would like to send me feedback but don’t know what to say - Do you like rereading or thinking about any parts of this story? I’d love to know what really caught your heart or interest in some way! Though a quick word or two is lovely too!!! Thank you!

**Author's Note:**

> I live for each and every comment - thank you!!! :D


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